Have We Gone Too Far?

I froze.

I couldn’t move at all.

They tried to get me out of the house, but I didn't listen to them. I stayed but now I really regret it. There are a few things that scare me, and right now, all of those things are in this house, looking at me. Staring at me.

What I've never understood is what I did wrong. What did I do to deserve all of this crap? What am I being punished for?

I stopped thinking when my eyes locked with my dad’s, petrifying me. Last time I saw him, he’d left me for dead in an alleyway and some stranger had to call a taxi for me. That night is one I’ll never forget. I forgave him for everything...then he left me. It was like the first time he started to hit me. I trusted the guy so much, he’s my dad, what reasons did I have not to? And then he betrayed me just like that. When I finally started to regain that trust, he destroyed it again.

And some people wonder why I have trust issues...

The look my dad gave me confused me even more. He looked sympathetic. How is that even possible? He just broke into Cole’s house and now he’s trying to act sorry. What’s wrong with him?

I quickly moved my gaze away from him and turned to look at Cole. He was staring at Mr. Baker. I could tell Cole was trying to look as calm as possible, but when I leaned against him I could feel him shaking. He was scared too.

“Why the hell are you here?” Cole asked, not addressing his question to any of the three in particular. His voice managed to stay flat, and for that I'm sure he was grateful.

I heard Mr. Baker’s laugh and felt my insides churn. I can’t be around that man. I hate him even more than I hate my dad. Mr. Baker’s hurt me in every way possible. He’s made it so I'm completely vulnerable to him, I wouldn't even try to stand up for myself if I was put again the guy. He got inside my head as well as...

My eyes started to water and I felt Cole’s grip on me tighten and I buried my head into his side, trying to hide myself from the three that have owned my nightmares for what feels like forever to me.

“Aww what’s up Zacky?” I heard another voice ask. It was Derek.

My body tensed up even more. I wanted to hurt that guy so much. Out of the three of them, he scares me the least. I don’t fear him, I hate him! He’s ruined so much for me! If it wasn't for him, maybe my family wouldn’t have turned against me. He got me drinking, he got me into drugs. Derek was the bad influence.

I want to get back at him. I need to. He’ll pay for what he did to Beth, and I will be the one to make him.

“Zacky having a little cry,” Derek spoke again in the teasing pathetic voice you use to mock children.

Any patience that I had left in me was all taken away in that spilt second that he chose to speak.

I pushed away from Cole, shocking him as I pounced on Derek. At that moment I couldn’t care less about anything that was going on, I just wanted to hurt him. I wanted to get rid of him. In all honesty, I wanted him dead.

We both fell down to the floor and I heard arguing around us. I expected it to be between Cole and someone, or maybe even John and someone, but that wasn't the case. I could clearly make out my dad’s voice as well as Mr. Baker’s. Maybe they’re not on the same page after all.

Derek was underneath me, but he was still giving as good as he was getting. Each punch he got in on me, I knew I had to match with my own. He knew what he was doing and he could’ve overpowered me, but I was determined. I wasn't giving up on this. I needed to make sure he was hurt.

I felt someone’s arms grab around my waist and try to pull me back off him, I assumed it would be Cole, trying to keep this situation as calm as possible, but it wasn't.

My body was pulled away from Derek’s and I watched as Mr. Baker held him back. This would’ve been the perfect moment to just unleash Derek on me, he’d be able to do a fair bit of damage now I'm being held back, but Mr. Baker kept his hold on him. Surprisingly he didn't try to help with getting me hurt.

When I calmed down I turned to face who it was holding me back. John. I stared at him for a moment, trying to work out if he really wanted to get me out of that, or if he was doing it for Cole. Whatever his motives were, they seemed like they could only be good in this situation.

“Control that skank of yours,” Mr. Baker hissed, still restraining Derek.

My heart started racing and I glared at him. I wanted to go over there and hit him. I’m scared of him, yes, but does that give him the right to talk like that about me? Hell no.

John could clearly see what I wanted to do, so he put his arms around me again and I heard him whispering to me.

“Just stay calm and don’t do anything stupid,” he said, knowing that only him and I would know what he was saying. “I’ll take out fatso when I get the chance,” he whispered, “don't you worry.”

I nodded my head and tried to collect myself. I looked over at Cole, who was standing on his own. I wanted to go over to him, but John wouldn't let go of me. Why won’t he let me be with Cole? Hell why isn't he over there with his brother? He cares about him way more than he does for me.

“What’re you doing here then?” John asked them seeing as no one answered last time that question was asked.

I kept my eyes on Cole, not particularly wanting to see anyone else right now; especially with the options that I have in here.

“We’re actually here to see your brother,” Mr. Baker answered, gesturing over to Cole.

Both of our bodies tensed, but John managed to not let it show. His face remained expressionless and although I’m sure Mr. Baker was trying to threaten Cole, John did nothing like move towards his brother as some form of protection.

“How you doing Cole?” he asked him, acting like we weren’t in a situation where he’s just broken into the house.

John was watching Mr. Baker’s every move, most likely waiting for the perfect moment to strike. As he got closer and closer to Cole I could feel John making himself more and more alert. He was ready to do whatever it takes when this starts getting out of hand, I could tell.

“Why are you here?” Cole asked him in a quiet voice.

“Oh you know why,” he hissed, raising his voice and obviously getting angry now. Cole shook his head at him.

“If anyone here should be apologizing, it sure as hell isn't me Frank,” Cole responded, shouting to the same volume that Mr. Baker did. “You know what you’ve done to me and Zack and if anything, you should be begging for forgiveness.”

Mr. Baker laughed at him and got right in Cole’s face. At this point I was scared for him. Being that close to him is terrifying, I should know.

“I only say sorry, if I regret what I did. Right now, the only regret I have is not shutting you two up sooner.”

My body went back into the frozen state it fell into before as I thought about the many things that that could’ve meant. Shutting us up? He wanted to kill us. Crap, what if that’s why he’s here now?

“Do you not have any heart at all?” Cole asked him in a mumbled voice.

I flinched as Mr. Baker punched the table. If he wasn't bald he’d be ripping his hair out right now. He was losing his patience with Cole, which was clear to all of us.

“Cut the crap and give me a bloody apology!”

Cole stepped back for a second before shaking his head, letting him know that he wasn't sorry for anything.

At that point Mr. Baker just snapped and punched him in the face. A smirk appeared on his lips after he hit him. My heart started racing. He placed his filthy fist one my Cole. He hurt my boyfriend! And John...he didn't do a bloody thing. He still hasn’t moved!

I tried nudging him, but still, nothing.

“Do you know how long I’ve wanted to do that for?” he asked slyly before taking hold of Cole’s chin and running his finger over his lips.

I couldn’t help but feel a bit jealous right now. No one touches Cole’s lips but me! Right now I don’t have the guts to say anything about it though.

Mr. Baker turned his head to look at my dad and Derek, who were now just standing there, waiting for some kind of instruction.

“Get the boy,” he hissed.

I stared at him wide eyed. Of course they were on about me. But why?

Derek walked over to where John and I were standing, a smirk on his face as he got closer to me.

“Give us the kid John,” he hissed.

John gave me a tight squeeze and ignored Derek’s request. I couldn’t help smiling at that. Derek’s the type of guy who always gets his own way, not this time though.

“Chuck Derek one of them pistols,” Sir shouted to my dad.

My heart started racing again. They’re armed. My dad’s going to give Derek a gun. My dad is providing the weapon which will most likely be the death of me.

An evil look appeared on Derek’s face as he caught the gun and turned back to face me.

“Don't!” I heard Cole shout from across the room.

Derek and Mr. Baker started laughing at him and I heard him cry out in pain as Mr. Baker head butted him, knocking Cole out and forcing him down onto the ground.

I knew John wanted to go over there and check on his brother, but he didn't leave me, and for that I am grateful.

On the inside I was screaming right now, but nothing was coming out. I was too scared to move, too scared to even try and speak. This was so bad.

“Give us Zack,” Derek hissed, holding the gun so it was facing John as Mr. Baker walked over to his side, knowing that Cole was knocked out and wouldn't be able to interfere for now.

John didn't move or react in any way to them being there. He didn't even care about the gun. How can do that? Just block it all out.

“I'm warning you Sanders!” Derek shouted this time, jabbing the gun to John’s forehead.

“J-John,” I stuttered, my voice was a lot more shaky than I wanted it to be. “J-j-just do it.”

John hesitated but did as I asked him. Mr. Baker pulled me into his arms and I started feeling even sicker.

I closed my eyes for a few seconds, trying to block everything out and pretend that none of this is happening. That didn't work. Nothing was going to work.

When I opened my eyes I started to panic. Why was Derek still holding the gun at John? He let go of me so why hasn’t he left John alone?

I looked up and saw Mr. Baker looking down at me already.

“You might want to turn away now,” he whispered, forcefully turning me so that my face was leaning against his chest.

I didn't want to cry, not in his arms, but I couldn’t control myself. The tears just fell and nothing I did could stop them.

When I heard a bang from the gun being fired, I completely broke down; I couldn’t even support my body anymore. I went completely limb and wouldn't be surprised if I ended up passing out. The part that made that even worse was that it was Mr. Baker holding me there, keeping me standing up right.

After a few seconds what had just happened sunk in. The gun was fired...

I jumped as Mr. Baker suddenly moved my body so it was facing ahead again. My eyes immediately landed on John. A cry escaped my lips as I saw him laying there on the floor.

“Shhh,” Mr. Baker whispered into my ear. “He’s going to be fine.”

I shivered as his breath touched my skin and I struggled to believe his words.

Blood.

It was...it was everywhere. All down John’s arm; all I could see was blood.

This time I felt more than sick. I was sick. I throw up right there and then and began feeling even worse as he started laughing at me.

“Too much for you?” Derek asked, joining in with the laughing.

I tripped as Mr. Baker pushed me forward and Derek grabbed hold of me.

“You might need to hold him up,” Mr. Baker explained, “I made him go weak,” he said sending a wink in my direction.

My stomach started aching once more and before I knew it I was throwing up again. At least this should show him what I think of him.

I wiped my mouth and tried to ignore the conversation that was going on around me.

“It’s pretty easy to solve that one Baker,” Derek laughed as he shoved my body down onto the floor in the corner.

It was a rough landing for me as I slammed into the wall, but nothing compared to what I'm feeling on the inside now. Not only am I scared but I was in the room when they bloody killed someone. What if he is dead? What if John’s dead?

More tears fell from my eyes as I looked over at his body again.

John...