You're My Daydream

I watched Jack through my brunette fringe, slowly taking a sip of my beer. We were in a bar tonight (me, Jack, Alex, Rian and Matt), just chilling after a long day at the studio. Lately, all I’ve been thinking about is Jack. I just can’t help it. He entrances me in his crazy hyper ways, and even though I know he’s straight, he’s the only thing that occupies my mind. Right now Jack and Alex are in a whisky shooting competition, and it’s pretty obvious that Jack’s losing. Badly. It’s obvious by the fact that Jack’s barely standing up.

“You’re staring again,” Rian whispered in my ear

I jumped slightly, startled, but turned to face my friend.

“Brah, I’m watching them drink,” I protested

“No, you’re only watching Jack,” Rian retorted, smirking slightly

I blushed lightly, but shook my head.

“Bullshit,” I scoffed

“What’s going on, Z?” Rian asked softly, raising an eyebrow

I looked at him, realising he wasn’t going to give up easily, and sighed. Rian always knows just how to read me. I guess that’s what I get for having the smart one of our group as my best friend, who knows that I’m bi.

“Nothing. Nothing at all,” I muttered, taking another sip of my beer

“But you wish there was...?” Rian suggested

“You have no idea,” I laughed dryly

“Have you talked to Jack about it?” Rian frowned

“You are joking, right? Jack would only laugh and you know it,” I mumbled

“It can’t hurt to try. I could always ask him what he thinks of you,” Rian offered

I was about to protest, but stopped when I remembered Rian wouldn’t make anything obvious. He’s subtle like that. Thank fuck.

“Don’t give him any hints,” I sighed, defeated

Rian just saluted and smirked. Then we heard cheers from in front of us, so I turned my head to see Matt holding Alex’s arm in the air.

“Better luck next time, Barakitty,” Alex grinned

Jack just poked his tongue out and stumbled over to me and Rian.

“You lost again, huh?” Rian teased

“S’not my fault I don’t like w-whisky,” Jack slurred

“Jeez, how much did you drink?” I frowned

Rian nudged me, teasing, but I ignored him.

“I don’t know. But I don’t feel so good,” Jack whined

“You want to throw up?” I asked

“N-No...can we just go home?” Jack pouted

I nodded. Anything for him.

“Jack wants to go back to the apartment so I’ll take him,” I announced to our three friends

“I’m gonna stay for a bit,” Matt shrugged

“Me too,” Alex nodded

“I’ll drive you then. I promised Kara I’d go over hers anyway, and you’ve had 4 beers so you can’t drive,” Rian prompted, wiggling his pepsi at me

“Sure,” I smiled

I slung Jack’s arm over my shoulder and helped him out of the bar, Rian just in front of us. I got Jack into the car and put his seatbelt on. But he wouldn’t let go of my arm, so I sat in the back with him. Rian chuckled and started the engine, driving down the road.

“Y’know, Zack, you’re really pretty,” Jack mumbled from where his head was resting against my shoulder

“You hear that? He thinks you’re pretty,” Rian grinned

I glared at him, before looking down at Jack.

“Thanks Jack. You are too,” I said softly

“You’re really really pretty,” Jack sighed

Then he passed out. Rian just laughed loudly, making me roll my eyes. Of course, Jack would have to be absolutely plastered to say anything about me. He won’t remember it in the morning, which sucks. Ten minutes later, Rian pulled up to the apartment we 4 shared, cutting the engine.

“I’ll go open the door, you carry him,” Rian instructed

I just nodded, unbuckling my seatbelt and Jack’s. I scooped my lanky unconscious friend in my arms, supporting his head with my shoulder. It’s times like this that I’m glad I work out so much, otherwise I wouldn’t be able to carry him. Rian unlocked the front door and opened it, letting me carry Jack through to his bedroom. But as I laid Jack down on his bed, he stirred awake.

“Zack, I don’t feel so good,” he groaned

“I’ll go get you a bucket then,” I replied, chuckling

“D-Don’t leave me,” Jack begged

My eyebrows shot up, surprised. What?

“Uh, I’ll stay after I’ve got you a bucket,” I said hesitantly

Jack smiled and flopped his head back onto his pillow. I pulled off Jack’s shoes before walking into the kitchen to get a bucket. Rian waved as he walked back out the front door, making me smile. Just me and Jack alone then. Grabbing a bucket, I walked back into Jack’s room, and put the bucket on the floor by his head.

“Zack?” Jack murmured

“Yeah Jack?” I asked softly

“Can you sing to me?” he pleaded

I chuckled and nodded, and sat down on his bed. For some reason, Jack likes me to sing him to sleep. I’ve had to do this a few times when he’s been drunk, but I don’t mind. I don’t mind at all.

“Make it a sweet, sweet goodbye -
it could be for the last time and it's not right.
"Don't let yourself get in over your head," he said.
Alone and far from home we'll find you...

Dead - Like a candle you burned out;
spill the wax over the spaces left in place of angry words.
Scream - To be heard, like you needed any more attention;
throw the bottle, break the door, and disappear.

Sing me to sleep, I'll see you in my dreams,
waiting to say, "I miss you. I'm so sorry."

I looked at Jack to see he’d fallen asleep. Smiling, I pulled the duvet over him, making sure he was comfy. I inhaled sharply, before leaning down and pressing a gentle kiss to his forehead, lingering slightly. Maybe things are better staying as they are. I know I couldn’t handle rejection from Jack; I’d rather him not know at all than have him awkward around me. Maybe I’ll just have to keep him to my daydreams.