Inside of You

It was 9:30 on the clock and I was beyond nervous. Garrett told me that everyone decided that a party was a good idea seeing that it was a Friday night and that there was nothing better to do.

I’m not sure if I’m nervous about the guys being there as well or the fact that Adam and John were going to be in the same house for more than a few hours, give or take.

I looked at myself again consciously at the full length mirror as I tried to keep it together.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to come?” Andy asked leaning against my door jamb.

“What kind of a question is that?” I replied with another question.

“What I mean is, are you sure you want to put two guys who don’t like each other in the same house for about 3 hours or so?” she clarified as she looked at a few products on my dresser.

“Wow, I never knew my conscience really spoke to me in person.” I said sarcastically. “What do you think I’m so nervous about?”

I was being snappy. This was bad. I needed to calm down and take another drag.

“I’m just saying,” she said patiently as she sat on my bed.

“Are they all downstairs already?” I asked.

“Yeah, they’re waiting for you to finish and for Adam to arrive,” she said nonchalantly as she walked out the door. She really can’t stay in one place for so long.

Just then my phone buzzed and I saw a notification saying that I had one new text message. I opened it and read its content. It was from Adam and he said that he was already on his way. I mean what happened about being here by ten?

My nerves were getting the best of me and my inner coach – who was telling me to calm down – was not helping me deal with the situation at all.

I breathed in and out smoothly as I put on my pumps. I knew I was bound to go down sometime.

As I went down the steps, I heard laughter erupting from the living room. That was typical of them to crack up about something someone said. But what I didn’t expect was them to stop when I reached the last step. Their eyes landed on me and suddenly I was under this big spotlight. I started to feel self conscious but eased when Garrett cleared his throat.

“Wow,” Kennedy managed to say. I smiled at him and nudged him on the shoulder with my elbow.

John couldn’t help but look. I stared back at him and watched as he looked away blushing. I smiled at that and told them about Adam coming a little early.

“That’s great,” Pat said all jumpy and excited. “That means more time to party!”

Pat was such a kid that sometimes I forget how old he really is.

A few minutes later, we were all heading out the door. Adam was a little surprised but he got over it. I told the guys that I’d ride with Adam and they didn’t seem to have a problem with that which in my opinion was sorta weird. I thought they’d make excuses but I was wrong. Maybe I’m too full of myself but whatever.

“You look beautiful tonight,” Adam said as if it was protocol. There was no feeling in that statement at all so I just beamed at him from the side even though I knew he couldn’t see it.

“What’s wrong?” I had to ask. I mean I needed to know if I did something wrong.

“Nothing, it’s just that it’d be just us you know,” he said.

“But I thought you said we were going to a party,” I said alarmed.

“We are,” he said, “but I just don’t feel comfortable around your friends,”

I bit the inside of my cheeks as I searched for something to reply with but came up short. I didn’t know what to say to that. I mean what was I supposed to say?

“Sorry,” was the best I could come up with and when he heard exactly how I sounded, he looked to the side and grabbed my hand. He smiled and let me know that it was okay.

Another turn to the right and we were at our destination. The house wasn’t a house. It was more of a mansion.

“Wow, your friend seems rich,” I told him and he smirked.

We both got out of the car and the guys greeted Adam. If you were a stranger looking on, you’d probably think they were all such good friends. They hid their emotions so well that it almost scared me. Well everyone except John, that is. He hardly acknowledged the guy but that was a good thing because I really didn’t want to spark a fight this early.

We went inside and Adam greeted the host and his girlfriend. He welcomed us warmly and told us to make ourselves at home because anyone who came to his parties were his instant friends. I guess he was sorta drunk already but that didn’t really come as a surprise.

“Want something to drink?” Adam asked and I nodded.

“Sure,”

He grabbed my hand and moved me through the sea of people as we made our way to the kitchen. When Adam let go of my hand, I waited outside the crowd of people grabbing and mixing a few drinks and felt a hand on my side.

“I told you I’d find you,” a husky voice whispered into my ear.

A chill ran down my spine as I realized who it was. I didn’t turn or move at all. I was numb and I wanted to run far away.

I was in danger and my feet were stuck on the floor.