Emotionless

‘Falling into another man’s arms, naughty girl,’ someone whispered in my ear. I looked up shakily, seeing a pair of dark green eyes smirking down at me as Matt flicked some hair from his face. I frowned, pushing him away from me as I straightened myself out quickly, my bracelets jangling together as I brushed my hands down my shirt. ‘Don’t frown, dear. You’ll get wrinkles on that pretty face of yours.’ Hobbling away, I ignored the eyes on my butt and legs and followed after a sheepish looking Icky. Zacky had pulled the golden and purple muffins from the oven, steam seeping up from them and into the air to create a swirling pattern in the air.

I wound my arms around his waist from behind, resting my head on his shoulder to try and throw Matt off trying anything on with me again. Zacky smiled, his arm winding around my shoulders and pulling me into his side as he motioned a hand towards the muffins. ‘We make a good baking team, eh, Keke.’ I giggled, nodding my head as the footsteps of Matt followed in from the kitchen. The iHome sang away on the windowsill, the music intoxicating me like the sweetest form of alcohol. I shook my hips to the beat, wriggling from Zacky’s grip and tugging on his hand to dance with me around the kitchen, ignoring Matt completely as he lingered in the doorway.

‘Awe, isn’t that the sweetest thing ever?’ Matt cooed as Zacky spun me around, hugging my waist from behind as he grinned over at his brother. ‘So, when are you gonna tell her?’ I glared at Matt before looking up at Zacky who had let go of my waist and was leaning against the kitchen counter. His brother had a sickly smirk on his face, telling me that something was definitely wrong. I turned around to look at Zacky, crossing my arms over my chest as I waited for him to say something. ‘Well? She’s going to if you don’t tell her, I will. Keeley, sweetie, Zacky’s a daddy. His ex-girlfriend moved back and she’s got a sprog that’s his. That’s why he was on the phone so much last night.’

My jaw dropped. Picking myself up again, I looked towards Zacky who had a sheepish expression on his face. ‘I-is that true?’ I whispered, unable to allow the words to process in my mind. He’d been trying to on with me all this time and he has a kid! Zacky nodded his head slowly, opening his mouth to explain but shut it again as the words became trapped in his throat. ‘I –um- see. Of course, yeah, it kinda makes sense now I suppose. I better, uh, get going. Pippa might burn the house down trying to cook breakfast and Molly is probably too loved up to help, um, yeah.’ I kept babbling on nervously, wandering away to the front door.

‘No, Keke, wait.’ Someone grabbed my wrist when I reached the door to my freedom away from this place. ‘Please, it’s not what it looks like, I promise,’ Zacky was pleading but it didn’t quite reach my ears. I blocked everything out, tugging my arm from his grip and walking out the front door into the cool afternoon sunshine of Huntington. Well, everything felt cold to me now. I rubbed my arm silently, hobbling away without my crutches; I guess I shouldn’t really use them too much. My heart felt as if someone had just torn it apart with icy fingers of wrath. Nothing felt real anymore. I guess I was right about him. Why, oh why, didn’t I listen to my own warnings?

Pulling out my phone, I dialled my aunt’s number slowly, eyeing the digits on the iPhone slowly as if to debate on whether to press call or not. With a deep breath being sucked into my body, I pressed the green button and held the phone to my ear as I listened closely to the ringing tone. My aunt’s voice sprung from the phone loudly, causing me to jump slightly from the swing I’d perched on. ‘Hi Aunt Layla, I’m, um, I’m in a bit of trouble. Could you come pick me up?’ I sobbed, wiping away the tears as fast as I could though they kept tumbling down my face.

‘I’ll be right there, Doll. The park on Huntington Road, right?’ Layla confirmed with an obvious reassuring smile in her gentle voice. Mumbling a reply, we said our goodbyes and I hung up quickly. Swing to and fro on the swing never felt so good and so free. The air was thick and cold, causing me to shiver as I swung higher into the grey abyss overhead. More tears stung my cheeks and turned them red with the friction of my palms rubbing furiously at them. How could I allow myself to have gotten in so deep? Why would I allow myself to get in so deep? Each niggling question chewed and gnawed at my mind, clamping down on me with and iron grip I couldn’t wriggle out of.

A cherry red convertible rolled up opposite the park, my aunt leaning from the window with a flustered expression on her face. ‘Need a spa day, baby?’ she called, making me half smile as I stood slowly and limped cautiously over to the car. ‘Cheer up, honey. We’re going to the spa for a full afternoon of relaxation, and while we have our back-rubs, you’re gonna tell me everything.’ Sliding onto the beige leather seat, I leaned my head back into the head rest and ran a hand through my hair. Layla looked over at me oddly, obviously noticing something weird. ‘Is that… a hickey?’

‘It’s nothing,’ I hissed quickly, scrambling to tug my hair over the shoulder she was looking at. Layla’s nimble fingers moved the hair from the red mark as she barked a laugh, poking my nose as she muttered that I don’t keep her as informed as I should. ‘I don’t want to talk about it.’ Layla sighed and cupped my cheek, rubbing the skin with her thumb before turning away to drive us away from the park. The music blasted in my ears, blocking everything else out from my mind but still not keeping the image of Zacky’s smile from my thoughts. Or the memory of how wonderful he made me feel when we were alone in the kitchen.

Damn my stupid mind. Damn it to hell!