Emotionless

Pippa and I were silent. The only sound was the loud music that boomed from the club we were stood outside of. My heartbeat accelerated to at least a million beats a second, my palms sweating as I chewed on my bottom lip. Heaving a huge sigh, I made my decision. Taking my hat from Pippa’s bulging shirt where she’d stuffed my hat in her bra (no idea why the heck she did that!), I pulled it onto my head and wrapped my arms around my body as I trudged in the direction which Molly had just stormed away in.

Thick darkness surrounded us, the only sound being the stomping beats of the music inside and Pippa’s high heels clacking against the tarmac. My converses squeaked as they rubbed against each other. “Molly!” I called pathetically, searching around the car park. Bob and Kirsten, the body guards, looked at Pippa and me oddly as we passed by the open doorway. “Molls, I’m really sorry!” It was useless. Bob cleared his throat, pointing in the direction of a shining BMW with the lights on inside.

“I saw Molly go towards that car with this huge bulky guy, they seemed a little friendly,” Kirsten explained with a small smile, lifting her glasses so she met my teary blue eyes. Pippa thanked the body guard gleefully and the two of us ran towards the BMW. When Pippa knocked on the tinted glass window of the passenger’s side, it wasn’t Molly that climbed from the car. It was an angered looking Matt who seemed to have what looked like wet patches on his shoulder.

“What the fuck did you say to Molly? Do you know how heartless you are?! Do you know how upset she is because of you?!” Matt roared, pointing directly at me. His once kind hazel eyes gleamed with pure rage as I gulped visibly. In the dark, he was even more intimidating than the other night when I punched him. Molly climbed from the car, black tears staining her cheeks as she ran over to Matt and tried to put herself between him and me.

Pippa walked across to Molly, getting her out of the way of Matt in case he lost control around her. I was the one who deserved the beating, not little Molly. She was sweet and innocent and deserved nothing but a guy like Matt who would stand up for her like this. I stared at him, a single tear rolling down my cheek which was quickly wiped away with the side of my sleeve covered hand. My contacts were burning my eyes, or was it the salt in these tears. I haven’t cried in so long. It felt alien to me now, having wells being filled with this water.

“Don’t you dare fucking cry! You’re nothing but a heartless whore who needs to get some emotions instead of going around like you’re some kinda higher being, punching guys who were trying to be nice and thinking you know what’s best. You need a reality check!” Matt bellowed, Bob walked away from the entrance of the club, Pippa running to stand in front of Matt as she glowered pure daggers at him. It was all true though; there was no point in me crying.

“Hey, that’s over the line. Keeley has been my best fucking friend since we were in baby-grows! What gives you the goddamned right to call her heartless? You barely know her!” Pippa yelled. Bob came over and escorted Pippa away to stand with Molly as Kirsten came over to help out. I shook my head, the tears had dried now and had been replaced with a hardened shell that stood like the wall of China around my heart and soul. A shaky breath left my lips as I turned and walked away.

“Yeah, that’s it!” Matt called after me, Bob and Kirsten trying to escort him to his car. “You fuckin’ run away. Don’t you dare come near me or any of my friends. And that includes Molly!” I gulped down the lump in my throat and carried on walking. I passed by Pippa’s car that was on the other side of the car park and slipped around the back. I was in need of a release, something to beat my anger into without people realising I was upset. Carefully slipping through the back door, I wandered down the corridor towards River’s office where he was stood outside talking with some chick with long blonde hair and fake tits that size of bloody Russia.

River turned from the fake woman, smiling at me widely and opening his arms out to hug me. I hugged him back, thanking him gratefully for letting me do this. River told the blonde woman to wait in his office before he wound his arm across my shoulders and led me through the back way towards the decks. Lights flashed in all directions, floating across the bodies of the swaying drunks that crowded in the centre of the dance floor. I gulped, nervous butterflies fluttering in my stomach as I pulled the ear phones around my neck and slammed a vinyl onto the deck.

“Are you guys ready to fuck this place up?!” I screamed into the mic, earning a roar as the music stopped for a moment and I began to play the heavy metal beats that boomed throughout the club. Of course, this club wasn’t just any club that played that pop crap that has just been remixed. No, we play some real shit. Pendulum began to play and I worked it with some Five Finger Death Punch, scratching and merging them together to create a song that had everyone jumping and dancing around. This is where I belong, behind the decks with my ear phones and my brother watching me from the sidelines to make sure I don’t get hurt. I sighed.