Darkness Falls
I'm Letting Go?
At sunset, Leah wearily got up to place "The Young and The Hopeless" inside her CD player and turn it on. She placed it on random play, grabbed her razor blade, and sat on her bed to wait.
"I can't decide whether or not to live or to die. If The Day That I Die plays, I'll die. If Hold On plays, I'll live."
The album played out. Leah sat on her bed, just listening. Sometimes she even sang along. With tears in her eyes, she realized that once this song ended only two songs were left.
The Day That I Die and Hold On.
"Heh. My destiny decided by music. Ironic." Leah laughed through her tears as the last chord to Lifestyles of The Rich and Famous ended. She waited eagerly for the next sound.
It was Cashdogg barking.
"Oh well." Leah gripped the blade and pulled it across both wrists, cutting deeply into her own flesh. "Didn't really like life anyways."
The last thing Leah heard before falling backward onto her bed was Joel's voice.
"Darkness falls, I'm letting go.
All alone but I feel just fine."
Xx : Darkness Falls: A Joel Madden Story : xX
Two days later, Leah woke up in a hospital bed. She had IVs stuck into her, plastic wristbands on the left arm, and bandages on both.
"Leah!" She was attacked by a sobbing brown mass of hair.
"Get off, Kat." Leah tried to speak firmly, but all that came out was a hoarse whisper.
Kat obliged and began to tell what had happened. "I came to visit you and you were all cut up. I called 911, and now you're here. The doctors say you're gonna need to stay here for a bit. They said you need counceling, too. They knew you tried to commit suicide from the wounds."
Leah tried to reach for a glass of water. As she did so, Kat glanced at the wrists. "Why?"
"The only parts of my life that are still really here are music and you."
"You have family."
"Then why the hell aren't they here?!" Leah tried to yell, but Kat crammed an orange quarter into her open mouth. "Rugha frugh?" Leah tried to swear, but failed miserably due to said orange.
"Vitamin C helps the throat. Lyra's worried sick about you. And if that isn't good enough, here's something else for you to live for." Kat handed Leah an envelope postmarked from Waldorf, Maryland.
"Waldorf? Where the hell is that? What the hell is this?" Leah said, turning it over in her hands. There was a post office box for the return address.
"I entered you in something. I'm suprised you don't know where that is..." Leah tore open the envelope, set aside a few extra pieces of paper, and read the handwritten letter.
Hello, Leah!
I'm writing this letter to congratulate you on winning our 'Chronicles of Life' Contest. Enclosed are plane tickets to come meet us, and I'll have a driver meet you at the airport. Hopefully we can hear your music live there!
Love, Benji Madden of Good Charlotte XOXO You can't clone me, y'all!
"BENJI MADDEN?! WHAT CONTEST!?" Leah attempted to scream again and actually did so this time, making a nurse that was walking into the room with a lunch tray to drop it and break/spill everything.
"The Chronicles of Life Contest. Can't you read? I entered one of your songs."
"How? Nobody's ever heard my songs."
"I put a tape recorder in your room, checked it out, and sent it in. But hey, you get to meet Joel!"
Leah tried to punch Kat, but fell backwards onto her pillow. "You need to rest. Your blood cell and hemoglobin counts are still low."
"Now more than ever do I wish I was in Corpse Bride." Leah finished. "All right. Can you hook up the webcam so you can pack for me?"
Kat smiled. "Yeah. Keep your laptop on AIM and I'll link it. The usual url."
Leah reached for the laptop and accessed AOL Instant Messenger. "M'on it. Chat with ya later." Kat waved bye as a woman walked in.
"Miss Carter? My name is Rebekah Miller." Rebekah extended her hand. Leah didn't reach for it, leading to an awkward silence in which Rebekah withdrew the hand. "I am your councelor. Would you like to get started?"
"Can I say anything?" Leah asked.
"Of course. Everything is confidential."
"I don't need your help, bitch, so get the fuck out of my hospital room and leave me the hell alone." Leah glared and flicked her eyebrows upward for a millisecond.
"You need to talk to a councelor. You tried to commit suicide."
"I talked to you, didn't I? You learned that I don't like you. Get out."
Rebekah tried to speak again. "But you need..."
"Don't make me call my lawyer. I will." Leah threatened. "I already told you I don't want to speak with you." Leah's laptop began beeping.
"Now if you will excuse yourself, I have a video confrence to attend to."
Miss Miller walked out, disappointed she didn't do her job. Leah opened the laptop and acknowledged that her twin, Lyra, was Instant Messaging her.
YourAardvark7: Leah! Thank fucking God!
93percentpunk: i know...i just had a councelor come in and make me tell her where to shove it.
YourAardvark7: Damn it, you scared the shit out of me! Kat called and I fucking fainted! What the hell got into you?
93percentpunk: bacteria of sorts...i think i have a cold.
YourAardvark7: You know what I mean...I'll call later, I have to get to work.
93percentpunk: i'll be on aim, Kat's streaming a webcam. I'M VISITING GOOD CHARLOTTE!!!
YourAardvark7: NO SHIT?! Fuck work, I'm going to visit you. See ya in eight hours. (Author note: that would be flight/driving time)
93percentpunk: alright ttyl
YourAardvark7 signed off at 5:23 PM.
Leah hooked up her webcam, then played Go on her computer to kill time until Kat IMed her.
MeowMix66: allright, hit it.
93percentpunk: right then
Leah turned on her webcam and went to an address to see Kat in her bedroom. "Hey Kat."
Kat smiled. "Nice to see you. What do you want?"
"ToV shirt, Level 27 track jacket, MADE hoodie...you know what, all the black stuff."
Kat went over to a closet and grabbed some hoodies, then dropped them into a large red suitcase. Then she headed to the dresser and grabbed t-shirts, pants, and threw in a few pairs of shoes. "Anything else, madam?" She faked a French accent.
"Fuck off, you offered...London hoodie and the moose, sushi, black, plaid and grey pajama pants. Seven undershirts, unmentionables, jeans, jean jacket..." Kat ran around throwing things in the suitcase. "CD player, phone charger, CD case, Sammy Raccoon..."
"You get to cuddle a MADDEN and you want your RACCOON?!" Kat asked.
"Shut up and pack him. Sketchpad, and that's it I think."
"Got enough shit?" Kat joked.
"Forgot the jewelry and makeup." Leah remembered.
Sighing, Kat emptied a few little drawers from a jewelry box into a bag and reached for a small case of makeup. "That should be all of that you need...finished?"
"Yeah. I'm ready for when I get out of here."
Xx : Darkness Falls: A Joel Madden Story : xX
Lyra walked into Leah's darkened room. "Heya."
Leah woke with a start. "Hey."
"So what's this I hear about you going to visit Good Charlotte?" Lyra asked, setting down a small backpack.
"Kat taped one of my songs and entered it in the 'Chronicles of Life' contest. Before you ask, no I didn't let her. She just did it."
"And you won?"
"Yeah. Here's Benji's letter." Leah handed over the envelope. Lyra read in silence then consulted the tickets.
"Hey Lee..."
"What?
"There's four tickets here, not just one."
Leah grabbed the envelope back, letting her sister keep the letter. After searching, she found a smaller note.
"Benj can be an insensitive moron sometimes. You can bring three friends if you want.
Joel"
"I get to bring three others! That's what Joel says!" Leah whispered excitedly. "You and Kat...that's all I'm bringing."
"I'll leave and let Kat know so we can pack. And I'm getting you out early for this."
"How...?"
"I'm a nurse. I hook this equipment up every day. You're a makeup artist for music videos and films. And we're identical twins." Lyra explained, and Leah's eyes brightened.
"You'd do that?"
"I can keep an eye on you when you're out." Lyra passed a makeup kit over to Leah. "Now make the scars."
Leah carefully applied her scars to Lyra and wrapped the bandages. "Bracelets...That's a problem..."
Lyra held up identical ones. "Kat gave me your codes earlier. I made new ones before I left."
She also handed Leah the backpack. "You change into these, I change into the robe, then you change again into my clothes. I'll fake the IV work while you're doing that."
Leah drug her IV into the bathroom and changed while Lyra put a shortened needle into her arm and put the heart rate monitoring gear on herself. Leah emerged while Lyra was putting on the finishing touches.
"Give me your robe." Lyra commanded. She changed and left her clothes for Leah to change into again. Once the appearances were done, they only had to transfer the heart rate and IV machines.
Lyra explained the details. "Okay, the plan for the IV is simple. I have a fake needle in my arm. For heart rate it's more difficult... I have to be in the bed when you unplug yourself and hide the cord. You have about fifteen seconds after the pull. Got it?" Leah nodded.
"All right. First the IV..." Lyra transferred it without a problem. She then got into the bed.
"Ready?" Lyra asked.
"Ready." Leah answered. "Thanks."
Lyra smiled and placed her cord by the plug. "Go."
Leah yanked out the cord and shoved it inside her shirt just as a nurse came running in.
"I unplugged my monitor by accident." Lyra said. "Sorry."
The nurse looked at Lyra strangely, then gave a glance toward Leah. "It's all right. Visiting hours are over, miss."
"Oh, I'm sorry!" Leah said, scooping up the letter and backpack. "I'll leave. Be on AIM, chica."
"Yeah. Bye." Lyra said. Thirty seconds later she got a text message from Leah.
Not so cheery! I've been pissed all day! ~Leah
Lyra sent a reply back and sighed. "Only twelve hours to go..."
"I can't decide whether or not to live or to die. If The Day That I Die plays, I'll die. If Hold On plays, I'll live."
The album played out. Leah sat on her bed, just listening. Sometimes she even sang along. With tears in her eyes, she realized that once this song ended only two songs were left.
The Day That I Die and Hold On.
"Heh. My destiny decided by music. Ironic." Leah laughed through her tears as the last chord to Lifestyles of The Rich and Famous ended. She waited eagerly for the next sound.
It was Cashdogg barking.
"Oh well." Leah gripped the blade and pulled it across both wrists, cutting deeply into her own flesh. "Didn't really like life anyways."
The last thing Leah heard before falling backward onto her bed was Joel's voice.
"Darkness falls, I'm letting go.
All alone but I feel just fine."
Xx : Darkness Falls: A Joel Madden Story : xX
Two days later, Leah woke up in a hospital bed. She had IVs stuck into her, plastic wristbands on the left arm, and bandages on both.
"Leah!" She was attacked by a sobbing brown mass of hair.
"Get off, Kat." Leah tried to speak firmly, but all that came out was a hoarse whisper.
Kat obliged and began to tell what had happened. "I came to visit you and you were all cut up. I called 911, and now you're here. The doctors say you're gonna need to stay here for a bit. They said you need counceling, too. They knew you tried to commit suicide from the wounds."
Leah tried to reach for a glass of water. As she did so, Kat glanced at the wrists. "Why?"
"The only parts of my life that are still really here are music and you."
"You have family."
"Then why the hell aren't they here?!" Leah tried to yell, but Kat crammed an orange quarter into her open mouth. "Rugha frugh?" Leah tried to swear, but failed miserably due to said orange.
"Vitamin C helps the throat. Lyra's worried sick about you. And if that isn't good enough, here's something else for you to live for." Kat handed Leah an envelope postmarked from Waldorf, Maryland.
"Waldorf? Where the hell is that? What the hell is this?" Leah said, turning it over in her hands. There was a post office box for the return address.
"I entered you in something. I'm suprised you don't know where that is..." Leah tore open the envelope, set aside a few extra pieces of paper, and read the handwritten letter.
Hello, Leah!
I'm writing this letter to congratulate you on winning our 'Chronicles of Life' Contest. Enclosed are plane tickets to come meet us, and I'll have a driver meet you at the airport. Hopefully we can hear your music live there!
Love, Benji Madden of Good Charlotte XOXO You can't clone me, y'all!
"BENJI MADDEN?! WHAT CONTEST!?" Leah attempted to scream again and actually did so this time, making a nurse that was walking into the room with a lunch tray to drop it and break/spill everything.
"The Chronicles of Life Contest. Can't you read? I entered one of your songs."
"How? Nobody's ever heard my songs."
"I put a tape recorder in your room, checked it out, and sent it in. But hey, you get to meet Joel!"
Leah tried to punch Kat, but fell backwards onto her pillow. "You need to rest. Your blood cell and hemoglobin counts are still low."
"Now more than ever do I wish I was in Corpse Bride." Leah finished. "All right. Can you hook up the webcam so you can pack for me?"
Kat smiled. "Yeah. Keep your laptop on AIM and I'll link it. The usual url."
Leah reached for the laptop and accessed AOL Instant Messenger. "M'on it. Chat with ya later." Kat waved bye as a woman walked in.
"Miss Carter? My name is Rebekah Miller." Rebekah extended her hand. Leah didn't reach for it, leading to an awkward silence in which Rebekah withdrew the hand. "I am your councelor. Would you like to get started?"
"Can I say anything?" Leah asked.
"Of course. Everything is confidential."
"I don't need your help, bitch, so get the fuck out of my hospital room and leave me the hell alone." Leah glared and flicked her eyebrows upward for a millisecond.
"You need to talk to a councelor. You tried to commit suicide."
"I talked to you, didn't I? You learned that I don't like you. Get out."
Rebekah tried to speak again. "But you need..."
"Don't make me call my lawyer. I will." Leah threatened. "I already told you I don't want to speak with you." Leah's laptop began beeping.
"Now if you will excuse yourself, I have a video confrence to attend to."
Miss Miller walked out, disappointed she didn't do her job. Leah opened the laptop and acknowledged that her twin, Lyra, was Instant Messaging her.
YourAardvark7: Leah! Thank fucking God!
93percentpunk: i know...i just had a councelor come in and make me tell her where to shove it.
YourAardvark7: Damn it, you scared the shit out of me! Kat called and I fucking fainted! What the hell got into you?
93percentpunk: bacteria of sorts...i think i have a cold.
YourAardvark7: You know what I mean...I'll call later, I have to get to work.
93percentpunk: i'll be on aim, Kat's streaming a webcam. I'M VISITING GOOD CHARLOTTE!!!
YourAardvark7: NO SHIT?! Fuck work, I'm going to visit you. See ya in eight hours. (Author note: that would be flight/driving time)
93percentpunk: alright ttyl
YourAardvark7 signed off at 5:23 PM.
Leah hooked up her webcam, then played Go on her computer to kill time until Kat IMed her.
MeowMix66: allright, hit it.
93percentpunk: right then
Leah turned on her webcam and went to an address to see Kat in her bedroom. "Hey Kat."
Kat smiled. "Nice to see you. What do you want?"
"ToV shirt, Level 27 track jacket, MADE hoodie...you know what, all the black stuff."
Kat went over to a closet and grabbed some hoodies, then dropped them into a large red suitcase. Then she headed to the dresser and grabbed t-shirts, pants, and threw in a few pairs of shoes. "Anything else, madam?" She faked a French accent.
"Fuck off, you offered...London hoodie and the moose, sushi, black, plaid and grey pajama pants. Seven undershirts, unmentionables, jeans, jean jacket..." Kat ran around throwing things in the suitcase. "CD player, phone charger, CD case, Sammy Raccoon..."
"You get to cuddle a MADDEN and you want your RACCOON?!" Kat asked.
"Shut up and pack him. Sketchpad, and that's it I think."
"Got enough shit?" Kat joked.
"Forgot the jewelry and makeup." Leah remembered.
Sighing, Kat emptied a few little drawers from a jewelry box into a bag and reached for a small case of makeup. "That should be all of that you need...finished?"
"Yeah. I'm ready for when I get out of here."
Xx : Darkness Falls: A Joel Madden Story : xX
Lyra walked into Leah's darkened room. "Heya."
Leah woke with a start. "Hey."
"So what's this I hear about you going to visit Good Charlotte?" Lyra asked, setting down a small backpack.
"Kat taped one of my songs and entered it in the 'Chronicles of Life' contest. Before you ask, no I didn't let her. She just did it."
"And you won?"
"Yeah. Here's Benji's letter." Leah handed over the envelope. Lyra read in silence then consulted the tickets.
"Hey Lee..."
"What?
"There's four tickets here, not just one."
Leah grabbed the envelope back, letting her sister keep the letter. After searching, she found a smaller note.
"Benj can be an insensitive moron sometimes. You can bring three friends if you want.
Joel"
"I get to bring three others! That's what Joel says!" Leah whispered excitedly. "You and Kat...that's all I'm bringing."
"I'll leave and let Kat know so we can pack. And I'm getting you out early for this."
"How...?"
"I'm a nurse. I hook this equipment up every day. You're a makeup artist for music videos and films. And we're identical twins." Lyra explained, and Leah's eyes brightened.
"You'd do that?"
"I can keep an eye on you when you're out." Lyra passed a makeup kit over to Leah. "Now make the scars."
Leah carefully applied her scars to Lyra and wrapped the bandages. "Bracelets...That's a problem..."
Lyra held up identical ones. "Kat gave me your codes earlier. I made new ones before I left."
She also handed Leah the backpack. "You change into these, I change into the robe, then you change again into my clothes. I'll fake the IV work while you're doing that."
Leah drug her IV into the bathroom and changed while Lyra put a shortened needle into her arm and put the heart rate monitoring gear on herself. Leah emerged while Lyra was putting on the finishing touches.
"Give me your robe." Lyra commanded. She changed and left her clothes for Leah to change into again. Once the appearances were done, they only had to transfer the heart rate and IV machines.
Lyra explained the details. "Okay, the plan for the IV is simple. I have a fake needle in my arm. For heart rate it's more difficult... I have to be in the bed when you unplug yourself and hide the cord. You have about fifteen seconds after the pull. Got it?" Leah nodded.
"All right. First the IV..." Lyra transferred it without a problem. She then got into the bed.
"Ready?" Lyra asked.
"Ready." Leah answered. "Thanks."
Lyra smiled and placed her cord by the plug. "Go."
Leah yanked out the cord and shoved it inside her shirt just as a nurse came running in.
"I unplugged my monitor by accident." Lyra said. "Sorry."
The nurse looked at Lyra strangely, then gave a glance toward Leah. "It's all right. Visiting hours are over, miss."
"Oh, I'm sorry!" Leah said, scooping up the letter and backpack. "I'll leave. Be on AIM, chica."
"Yeah. Bye." Lyra said. Thirty seconds later she got a text message from Leah.
Not so cheery! I've been pissed all day! ~Leah
Lyra sent a reply back and sighed. "Only twelve hours to go..."