Bursting Red

Kisame gripped the rope tighter, the make shift lead that was attached to my mid section was slowly cutting off my circulation, but that wasn’t even the worst of it. When they had untied my legs so I could walk, first, I hardly had feeling in them and secondly, I had lost a lot of blood for the state I was in. The gash was swollen and a pink tinge was slowly spreading up my leg. Infection was the appropriate term. We left the village a good time ago, and to my horror, we left by foot. “She’s slow, can’t we just drag her?” Kisame spoke loudly, glancing at Itachi who plainly ignored him and continued to stare absently ahead. I brought my dizzy head up and looked forward. My hands were tied roughly behind my back but at least they had the kindness to un-gag me before heading out. I stole a glance to my left and for one second felt sorry for Deidara. Ridiculous. Here he walked, unscathed and having the nerve to feel sorry for himself while I limped along, numb and dizzy. They were right, I could feel it. Surely I would be dead by the time we reached this base. My head hung back down, the sun beating on my exposed back was burning me, there wasn’t even so much as a slight breeze to cool me down. We had been walking for what felt like hours and according to their overheard speech…it took four days to get there by foot. I stumbled in the dirt and with a sudden yelp, fell down, the rocks angrily marring the skin on my chest and face. “Do you see what I mean? She’s useless and she’s slowing us down! Leave her here.” He dropped the rope and continued to press forward. I didn’t even have the strength in me to look up and tell them to at least untie my arms.

“What?! No wait, you can’t just leave her here like this!” Deidara stumbled back towards me, his face a mask of pointless rage. “Let me carry her. I won’t run, I made a deal…what choice do I have.” He whispered down to me, brushing back a strand of hair from my bruised face. These minor injuries were partially my fault. It definitely taught me that when an S-class criminal wants to bind you down, you don’t struggle. Thrashing about had caused me to be slammed into the ground, straight into a small bed of rocks. I wouldn’t look at Deidara as he cradled me, holding me close to his chest as he walked. Even I knew, no matter how strong he was, he couldn’t carry me for two days straight. Kisame grunted as Deidara packed me around bridal style.

“How do we know you’re not going to make a run for it kid?” Kisame spoke. Even Sasori glanced up to wait for his answer.

“My hands are kind of full don’t you think! Hm, I can’t do anything without a free hand.” Deidara snapped coldly, glaring at the other missing nin. I made a small noise, wanting to tell him to try and not talk back, that there was no point in getting angry at them or having them angry with us. Considering we weren’t exactly in any position to talk big. It hurt too much to talk however. “Don’t worry Nezumi, you’ll be alright. I’ll make sure of that.”

“You’re a lot of talk Deidara-kun.” I managed to say. His eyes widened at me and for a moment I thought he was going to drop me to the ground and leave me there alone. But he didn’t. He looked away from me and scowled, angry but not angry enough to leave me behind.

“Once we reach the tree lines we’re going to be running. It would be wise to keep up.” Itachi said from his left, glancing over at Deidara and letting his scarlet eyes drift down to my cradled form. “I don’t want to have to force you to comply. Girl or not, if I must I will.”

“Deidara-kun, please…I would rather be left behind.” merely a mumble, he heard but pretended not to. Gripping tighter his face turned into one of unhealthy determination as the tree line steadily approached. I didn’t care, the world was shifting around me and my colors faded into one deep blue smear. Fading to black, I tried to keep my eyes open but the dizzy static in my brain took over and brought me down underneath a wave of silent shudders.

Day had turned to dark when I woke back up. A terrible mistake on my behalf as I realized with awareness came every pain and ache that had been overshadowed by my unconsciousness, at least my wrist bindings had been cut off. It hadn’t occurred to me that we had stopped moving until I glanced up and caught sight of Deidara’s sharp jaw line, breathing in and out with a light sleep. I was still in his arms. The world was nearly pitch black and even in this suffocating darkness I could feel a pair of watchful eyes, just waiting for us to make a move out of place. “What are you planning to do with Deidara-kun?” I said once I had rearranged myself out of Deidara’s grip and situated my body to ease the throbbing pain. I couldn’t tell who was there but whoever it was didn’t want to answer me right away. “Trust me, I’m no threat.” My head hung low as I spoke and I was nearly ashamed at the lack of confidence that leaked through my words. “I can hardly wield a butter knife and in this condition…well, I’m harmless.” A rustle, a breeze and they spoke.

“Deidara has a gift, a talent. He’s useful to us. Our orders aren’t given to us in detail, that’s all we know.” It was the man who had hardly said much this entire time. Not that the rest of them were talkative, but the small one seemed the most reserved out of all of them. It bothered me wondering where the blue one and the morose one had fled off to.

“Ah…I see.” More work, if it could even be called that. It’s not like I ever expected Deidara to keep his promise. If there was one thing I had learned spending so much time around him it was that he was as unpredictable as they come, I would even go so far as to say he was almost unreliable. “If you don’t mind me asking, what do you plan to do with me once we get to wherever we‘re going?” I didn’t want to know but it had to be asked. After all, if I was going to be killed I would like to have a chance to prepare myself properly. “Don’t worry, he’s sleeping, he won’t hear us. Besides, at this point his opinion doesn’t matter to me.” At least I hoped he was really asleep, if he heard me talk like that who knows what he would do.

“Hm, I don’t know why you’re asking me. If you’re not dead by the time we get there it’s up to our leader to decide your fate.” Right. It was strange talking about my life like it was a mere scrap of paper that could be thrown away. I cast my eyes back, looking over Deidara’s finely sculpted bone structure in the patches of moonlight that began to slip through the trees. The clouds were shifting, revealing a sea of stars above us. Sasori didn’t say anything else and that left me to close my eyes and drift away to tender memories of so many years ago...

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“It’s ugly outside Kaa-san, make it go away.” I sat in the window seat of our living room, my small hands pressed firmly against the cold window panes that were streaked with beads of rain. “I want to go play.” My mother drifted closer, a smile on her soft face and she placed a slender hand on my shoulder.

“Nezumi-kun, the rain brings us flowers, it feeds the plants, it‘s beautiful outside. It’s not ugly, you wouldn‘t say that if the sky was blue.” My hands slid down the glass, creating an unappealing noise as they fell.

“That’s because when the sky is blue it’s not ugly. But the sky is grey today.” Her laughter was like music and I turned towards her unable to hide the smile that was creeping on my own face.

“Don’t you know Nezumi-kun, every sky is blue.” My eyes widened in confusion and I pointed back outside. Couldn’t she clearly see the rain falling? “Those are just clouds, underneath all those clouds is a bright blue sky just waiting for you. Now close your eyes,” I did as I was told, closing my eyes and puffing out my cheeks. “And make a wish.”

“Okay, I made it. Now what?” I peeked through one eye and she tilted her head in the direction of the window. The sky broke apart and through the cover of the stormy weather was a pool of azure skies, as soon as it came, it left. “I saw it Kaa-san!” Her eyes softened and she reached out to bring me into her lap. “But you were wrong. Not every sky is blue…the night sky is black.” Nodding, I closed my eyes and pulled a serious mask on. She tapped my nose and when I opened my eyes she was smiling.

“My, you’re catching on quickly. You’re absolutely right, almost.” When I frowned again she cradled me closer, casting her own eyes out the wet window. “If it’s not here, then it’s somewhere else. There’s always a blue sky somewhere…”

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Deidara shifted next to me, pulling my lids open I scanned my surrounding area. Itachi, Kisame, and Sasori were both standing in front of us. It was still dark outside and I could only guess that a mere ten minutes had gone by. “We’re leaving. Come on, stand up.” Kisame spoke sharply. Deidara mumbled something from behind me and slowly got to his feet. Without his help I stood on my own, shaking and unstable. Despite his unfriendly demeanor he wrapped his arm around my waist. “I’m not going to let you get left behind. You shouldn’t think so low of me, hm.”

And we set off again into the looming forest.

By the time morning broke through I had developed a rather high fever. I was breaking out into a cold sweat and by that time found myself unable to form complete sentences without stuttering. I hadn’t been sleeping properly, remembering the last time I really ate was somewhat of a challenge, and my leg was beginning to fall numb. The truth was, I didn’t want to die just yet. Only three more days, I told myself softly, three more days to keep this up.

The next time we took rest, Deidara took this chance to treat my wound. By now it was disgusting, my leg was pink and swollen and I couldn’t step on it without nearly crying. As much as the medicine hurt, it was a relief to get a bandage put on. Now I didn’t feel so vulnerable. “Thank you and I’m sorry for what I said yesterday…you know I didn’t mean it.” I said quietly, glancing at him through my lashes.

He stared at me for a long while before turning his head away slowly. “Don’t lie, I know you did. Because it’s true. I’m not stupid, hm. And I’m sorry for putting you through this.” His eyes drifted over to the other three ninja, all of them were busy with thier attention not fully put on us. “I’m going to get you out of here soon,” he whispered urgently, tucking a loose strand of hair behind my ear. “You don’t deserve this, hm. Once we get to wherever these bastards are taking us I’m gonna find a way to get you home.”

“I can’t go home! I have…nothing left there to go home to…” Don’t cry, I pleaded with myself over and over again. “I can’t leave without you Deidara-kun…I won’t!” His hand tilted my face towards his sharply, with fingers roughly probing a tender bruise I hissed in pain.

“It’s better you leave without me than die. I can’t come with you, hm, not now.”

“Are you saying…you’re planning to stay with these people?” Absently, a tear slipped out, running the length of my cheek before sliding to his hand. His eyes dropped and he stared at the wet spot on his knuckles, removing his palm and refusing to look at me. His defiance clenched my gut, making it harder and harder to breathe. I wanted to go…but I needed him to come with me. I’d gone far too long playing the obedient, quiet child. I wanted a life, a life with Deidara. A life without him just wasn’t a life at all. Or not one I ever wanted anyway.

“It’s not easy. Not at all.”

“I love you, I hope you still know that.” Soft spoken, I wasn’t sure he even heard me. Eye contact was made and he dropped a small smirk, less passionate than the ones he usually delivered when I said something meaningful.

“I know Nezumi-kun.” I didn’t expect anything more from the boy. It was almost a relief to know he wasn’t going to return the feeling right then.

“Breaks over kids, no more stops from here on out. Deidara, you and your pet here will be introduced to our leader soon so shape up and if you know what’s good for you, keep that big mouth shut.” Kisame said, dragging Samehada over his shoulder with a smug grin. “Until then, just keep up.” To my amazement, all three ninja were gone. How fast they willed their bodies to move was a complete mystery to me. It was so unnatural it was unnerving.

“One more time, hm.” Deidara offered, holding his palm out. Despite the mouth opening in satisfaction, I placed my hand in his and he folded me inwards to his chest to hold me tight. Then, at an equally alarming rate, we were gone along with the rest of them.