To Go From There

Kellen walked me up to my front door and leaned in, putting one hand on my neck. I swallowed a lump of fear in my throat and he kissed me gently. He pulled back moments later, grinning.

“Goodnight, Kiernan.” he said, turning and walking off. I stared after him, watching as he loped off, sliding easily into his car. I stared as he started the engine and drove off. I looked at my hand and smiled when I saw his number scribbled there in permanent marker. He just so happened to be carrying a Sharpie on him.

I went inside and checked the messages.

“Message one, July 10th, 8:52pm.” the automated voice said.

“Hey Kiernan, it’s Mom. I just wanted to let you know that I’m not gonna be home before you start school. I’m sorry, sweetheart. I tried to get them to let me go but they said there’s no way. I love you. I hate to have to say this but you’re going to have to get a job. I called Marianne, she said she’s got an opening at the daycare. Call her. I love you, Kiernan. Be good while I’m gone.”

I fell to my knees and rested my head against the stand. I wanted my mommy. I wanted my dad to come back and magically make it all better. I wanted Rhys to walk through that door and blow Kellen’s kiss away. I wanted something to take my mind off that message.

My prayers, like most of them, were not answered. I waited by that stand all night, tears dripping down my face at random intervals. I held my head in my hands and pulled at my hair. I tried to stand, to drag myself to my room, to the couch, to the carpet at least. I tried to at least lay down but that wasn’t working for me. So I sat back up, leaning against the stand. I fell asleep.

I woke up, confused and sore. I was curled up, holding onto a phonebook.

“Hey, there she is.” I heard someone, a male voice said. I looked up and found Rhys and Genesee standing over me.

“What… what happened?” I croaked.

“Well, you went home with Kellen. We came home, hoping you were here and well…. We found you passed out on the ground.” Gen explained.

I wiped my now dry eyes and let Rhys pull me up off the floor. I gripped his shirt and rested against him.

“What happened? Kellen didn’t hurt you or anything, right? Because I swear to God, that boy won’t know what hit him if he did.” Rhys growled. I looked up at him and smiled.

“It wasn’t Kellen. My mom left a message for me while we were gone. She tried to play it off as it was no big deal but… she’s getting worse. I knew that tone of voice. She’s scared. She had that tone of voice when we first found out she had cancer… When Rob left, that tone came out. She tried to hide it but it’s been Mom and I for the longest of time. I know my mom, she’s my best friend. She’s scared out of her mind.”

“Oh, Kiernan…” Rhys muttered, kissed my temple and held me close.

“You take her upstairs to sleep in her bed. I’m going to make some of her favorite comfort foods. Alright?” Gen whispered to Rhys. I felt his head nod and he sweeped me up into his arms. I didn’t know how to handle it, but I knew I liked it. I nuzzled my head into Rhys’ shoulder as he carried me. I didn’t really understand. I was half asleep as he lay me down. I felt his lips on mine for a second before he lay down beside me. I turned and snuggled into Rhys’ side. It was just as amazing as I remembered it.

***

“I smell pancakes. And bacon. And… oh my god, she made blueberry muffins!” I jumped up and down on my bed, waking Rhys. He grabbed my ankles and pulled me down. I landed on top of him, straddling his stomach. I grinned.

“Are you bipolar?” he asked. I shook my head and leaned over, kissing his nose.

“No, I’m just… feeling better and now, I’m starving. Are you coming?”

“Can’t we just stay like this?”

“If I wasn’t wasting away, I’d be all for laying in bed all day with you. But, alas, good sir, I am in fact starved.”

“You are something else, Kiernan.” Rhys shook his head. I leaned over again and kissed him lightly. I jumped up, vaulting off the bed.

“Are you coming, Rhys?”

“I guess.” he pushed himself up and he stood beside me. I fixed his hair before grabbing his hand and dragging him downstairs. I squealed when I saw the counter of delicious food. There was pancakes, bacon, stacks of blueberry muffins, a bowl of fresh fruit, all sorts of juices and pancake puppies. Rhys chuckled.

“Well, I think there’s a secret fat person inside Kiernan that controls her happiness level.” Gen said, watching as I bounced.

“What are you talking about? Secret? Do you see this? I’m getting fat as it is!” I said, pulling at the skin on my stomach. Gen stared. Rhys grabbed my hand.

“Stop it, Kiernan. You’re beautiful.” he said. I blushed.

“Go eat, piglet.” Genesee instructed. I ducked out of Rhys’ grasp and grabbed myself a plate. I loaded it up with bacon and pancakes. I danced.

“She looks so happy.” Gen muttered to Rhys. I wasn’t supposed to hear it, so I pretended I didn’t.

“Yeah, it’s nice to see her like that.”

“Rhys… I know the rumors about Kellen.”

“I know. Sadly, I think most of them are true.”

Rumors? About Kellen? Sweet, “I’m going to help you” Kellen? What rumors? What’s wrong with Kellen?