Rome and Julie

Sighing contentedly to myself, I reached out and grasped the mug Maggie was offering me, snuggling into the back of the couch. Rome was seated beside me, sipping on his own warm cup of hot chocolate. Robert did the same, while doing so in his chair, looking slightly more pale than usual.

I had already opened all my presents and went through the whole act of pretending that I actually believed Santa had come and given me all of the gifts sitting under the tree. Robert and Maggie knew better than to actually believe me, but it was much more fun to believe in the joy and perfectness of there actually being a Santa Claus.

“Only 365 days left,” I announced suddenly, getting everyone’s attention. Maggie rolled her eyes and walked back into the kitchen, and I could smell that she was starting breakfast. I turned to Rome to start a conversation with him, but instead froze, eyes widening.

Rome’s birthday was tomorrow. And I didn’t get him anything.

Usually, instead of getting him a Christmas present and a birthday present, I just used his birthday as an excuse to give everything I got him then, to save me trouble. But that was a lie. It usually bought me time, because even though Rome’s birthday occurred every year on the same date, I always forgot. And waited until the last minute to get him something.

“What?” Rome questioned, obviously taking notice of my shocked face. Clearing my throat, I plastered a smile onto my face, telling myself I could go get him something later today.

“Nothing.” I widened my smile exaggeratedly, and Rome chuckled under his breath and rolled his eyes. Trying to hold back a sigh of relief, I thought of something to say. “I’m thinking that maybe you should hook me up to meet Jared Leto. You know, since I own half of our business and all, and I’m about three hundred times more important—,”

“I beg your pardon?” Rome said, raising an eyebrow. I watched him closely, seeing the hint of amusement at his lips, and the slight crinkle of his tan skin beside his eyes. Those lips that I got the privilege of kissing, and those eyes that revealed slight flecks of gold at close proximity. Feeling my body begin to heat up, I shrugged, turning my face away before Rome could catch on to my thoughts. He seemed to be too good at that lately.

“Oh… just, nothing,” I teased, clearing my throat. Rome laughed through his nose, and I risked a glance in his direction.

“You think you’re more important than me? Whose name is first? Madden&Corbin Company? Oh that’s right… that would be mine,” Rome said smugly. I grinned back sarcastically, and then stuck my tongue out at him when he held my gaze for longer than what was normal.

“Oh, quit fighting, you two. It’s very tiresome,” Maggie said as she entered the living room again, this time to bring out napkins. We always ate breakfast in the living room on Christmas morning, so we could look at the small Christmas tree set up in the living room before we had to take it down.

“You’re tiresome!” I quipped childishly, staring at Maggie as she didn’t even spare me a glance, and just turned back around and head towards the kitchen. “Ouch. Ignored…,” I muttered, feigning a look of hurt.

“I need to go shopping today,” Rome said from beside me in a conversational tone, and I couldn’t even stifle the disbelieving snort that escaped through my throat.

“You so sounded gay just then.” Rome’s eyes narrowed considerably, until his facial features relaxed into that of a smug expression.

“Dear Julie, you of all people should know that I’m not gay.” Startled, I choked on some of the hot cocoa I had just drank. I held the drink away from me, in hopes that my coughing wouldn’t shake the cup and spill it everywhere. Rome, laughing, took my cup while I had a coughing fit.

When I could breathe almost normally, I glanced over at Robert to see if he had overheard anything, but he was immersed in the television. Had I been looking closer, I would’ve seen the small smile that was on his lips, as he tried to hide it behind his mug, pretending to take a drink.

“As I was saying, I need to go shopping,” Rome said, making me look back over to him. He handed me back my mug, and I sipped it cautiously, raising an eyebrow in question. “I need to get some of my associates Christmas gifts. Do you want to go to the mall a few towns over later on with me?” I knew it was a perfect time to shop for Rome, although I’d have to find a way to escape him for a little while for privacy.

“Yep,” I replied, popping my ‘p’ in hopes of sounding nonchalant and casual. Rome still had a hint of that smug look on his face, but I deliberately ignored it. I had more important things to fret over, such as getting Rome a gift for his birthday. In less than twenty four hours. “Let’s go,” I said suddenly, abruptly standing from the couch. Something hot stung me in the stomach, and I glanced down, seeing a large brown stain on the green t-shirt I’d thrown on this morning. “Shit…,” I cursed under my breath, glancing around the room for something to wipe it off quickly.

“Here…,” Rome said, sounding amused, yet in a tone that insinuated he thought I was a child. He stood, grabbing my mug, still holding onto his, and began walking towards the kitchen. Feeling like a homeless puppy, I rolled my eyes and followed him reluctantly. I watched, leaning against the opposite wall, as he sat both mugs in the sink, and leaned over to take a couple of paper towels off the roll. He wet them down, and approached me.

“I can do that,” I insisted as Rome grabbed my shirt in his hands. One hand went under it to keep it off my skin, and the other worked the paper towel over the stain. Heat spread across the surface of my cheeks.

“Sure you can,” Rome said, not sounding convinced. I huffed and leaned my head back against the wall behind me, noting mine and Rome’s extremely close proximity. With my head tilting up, I could easily look into Rome’s face, and I studied him while I had the unproblematic opportunity. He had that look of concentration on his face that I recognized; eyebrows furrowed, lips slightly tightened, the upside down ‘V’ formed between his eyes. I smiled to myself, feeling pleased, flattered, and still slightly embarrassed with the constant reminder of Rome’s hands brushing against the sensitive skin on my lower stomach. “That’s as good as it’s gonna get for now.”

“Thanks,” I said, not bothering to check his handiwork as I waited for Rome to step away so I could go to my room and change. It took him longer than necessary to move away, and I gave him a lingering, knowing look before passing by him to head down the hall. I saw him smirk as he passed out of my view behind the kitchen doorway.

After showering and slipping on jeans and a pair of tennis shoes, I decided on wearing my new red and plaid button up flannel shirt. It fit well, and wasn’t too snug but didn’t hang off my torso like a trash bag. I liked it, and thought Maggie had nice taste. Rome hadn’t gotten me anything for Christmas yet, but usually he gave me whatever he purchased for me on the day I gave him his birthday/Christmas present. I applied light make up, feeling the joy that it was Christmas. Then I realized something.

It was Christmas.

Rushing back down the hall towards the living room, I stopped when I saw Rome sitting on the couch by himself.

“Rome, it’s Christmas. Everywhere is closed,” I pointed out, feeling very confused. Rome wasn’t one to forget something so obvious. He looked at me with a blank expression for a moment, and I cocked my head to the side, wanting to know what was really going on.

“I was actually hoping to make a road trip out of it. You know, go later on today after spending time with Maggie and Robert, then go up to a big city and staying for the weekend and shop. Since, you know, tomorrow is my birthday,” Rome said, winking at me. I felt my face heat up almost immediately, and I looked away. “I mean, if you don’t want to we can always—,”

“No!” I paused, watching Rome start to smile at how I sudden got so obviously flustered. “I mean, I do want to go. It sounds like fun.” Rome’s birthday, however, was starting to feel like a weight. I had no clue what to get him. Not a damn idea. “You can ask Maggie,” I said, grinning at him. Rome narrowed his dark eyes at me, his face set into an indignant expression.

“She’s your aunt.”

“It’s your idea.”

“You’re the one under eighteen.”

“Which makes you the one that has to ask, grandpa.”

I smiled innocently at Rome, showing all my teeth and batting my eyelashes. Rome rolled his eyes, getting off the couch and standing up erect.

“Don’t give me that expression. You’re a demon.” My mouth fell open, and I put an exaggeratedly shocked expression on my face.

“Rome Houston! How dare you call a lady such a name!” I exclaimed in a Southern Belle accent, watching with amusement as Rome tried not to smile. With another roll of his eyes, he began his way towards the kitchen, where I guessed Maggie was. I didn’t bother to follow, instead deciding to sit down on the couch Rome just vacated. It was still warm from where he sat, and I curled up, trying to gather as much heat as I could. When I got comfortable, I glanced at the television, just to see the sports channel. Fake sobbing, I reached towards the coffee table in front of me, where the remote sat. From my nest on the couch, I couldn’t reach it. I pouted, dropping my reaching hand, letting it hang over the side of the couch. “Rome…,” I half-said, half-moaned.

There was no answer, or emergence of Rome’s figure as a response to my summoning. Frowning, I took in a deep breath.

“Rome!” I moaned louder this time, trying once more to futilely reach for the far away remote. Still, despite my increase in voice volume, Rome didn’t come. Pretending to cry some more, I curled up in a little ball, arms locked around my knees as I hugged them to my chest.

“Julie?” Rome’s voice said after a few minutes, breaking my faux-sobbing. I titled my head up to look at Rome, who was standing by the couch, looking concerned. When he saw that I was perfectly okay, he rolled his eyes and took on an annoyed countenance. “Faker.”

“Can you please hand me the remote? If I move I’ll let all your warmth free.” Rome, instead of complying to my demand, stared down at me, slowly shaking his head. I jutted out my bottom lip, pouting to the best of my ability, and watched as Rome just rolled his eyes. “Please?” I drug out the word, this time reaching for him. Immediately, he backed away, a smile finally reaching his lips.

“Why? What’s on is good,” Rome noted, glancing over at the old television set. I followed suit, and made gagging sounds.

“No. Sorry to tell you this, but it really isn’t.”

Rome laughed, walking back in my direction. My hopes raised, but instead of leaning over to grab the remote like I‘d wanted, he walked right past, smug almost, and sat down on the couch beside my balled up body. I didn’t bother to speak to Rome; he wasn’t exactly listening to anything I was saying, obviously, by the way the remote still laid on the table just out of my reach.

“You’re allowed to go on a road trip with me. And you’re lazy.” I ignored Rome’s last jibe, taking a deep breath to gather my energy. I sat up, feeling cold rush onto my skin that was once warm. “Wow. You actually look devastated.”

“I am,” I replied, looking over at him. He was shaking his head at me, putting on an ashamed expression. I rolled my eyes, deciding it was time to change topics. “So, I think we should do something with the whole family today. You know, get out with Robert…,” I paused, feeling my throat being to constrict just at the mentioning of Robert’s name. I wondered if it would do that every time I thought or talked about him.

“Julie…,” Rome said, sounding understanding, but at the same time I could tell he didn’t want me to break down again. And I didn’t either. Crying wasn’t exactly my favorite pastime.

“No, I’m okay. I just think we should do something all together. I think he’d enjoy that,” I said, looking away from Rome so he couldn’t read me so easily. I saw him nodding in my peripheral vision, and hopped off the couch. “I’m gonna go ask Maggie what she thinks.”

Without waiting for a reply, I walked away from Rome and headed towards the kitchen. Upon entering, I saw Maggie by the sink, washing dishes. I skipped over to her, trying to lighten the weight that felt close to permanently crushing my heart.

“I propose we all do something together today, yes?” I said, hopping up onto the counter beside the sink so I could see my aunt’s face. Maggie looked over at me, and pursed her lips.

“I’ll have to see if Robert’s up for it. He went to rest in his room a few minutes ago, so I’ll have to check on him and see how he‘s feeling.” She paused, looking back down at the plate she was scrubbing. Soap suds ran half way up her arm, and she had a few specks of water on her cheeks. At least, I thought they were water drops. “What’s with you and Rome?”

Immediately, heat completely took over my body, and I felt as though I’d stepped into an oven. I ducked my head and stared down at my feet, swinging my legs back and forth, trying to hide my crimson-tinted cheeks.

“What do you mean?” I asked after a considerable silence, proving that I knew exactly what Maggie was talking about.

“Don’t play dumb. I can see right through you two. Especially you. Something is up.” I was silent, trying to think of something to say that didn’t reveal how clueless even I was about the situation, yet how thinking about Rome made my stomach either drop to my toes or elevate and disappear into thin air. “Well?”

“Nothing, Maggie.” Smooth, Julie. Real smooth.

“Yeah, right,” Maggie said after a disbelieving snort. I didn’t know how she’d caught on so quickly, or if we were being so obvious about the fact that we’d kissed. “Did you guys—,”

“Please, don’t,” I cut off, not wanting to hear what Maggie was about to ask. A grin crossed her face, and her gaze bore into mine. “Don’t look at me like that…,” I muttered, lowering my gaze again as a deeper blush set in on my already blazing cheeks. My heart was hammering in my chest with embarrassment as it was.

“You guys kissed, didn’t you?” I snapped my gaze up to hers, my eyes wide.

“Shhh! Not so loud!” I whispered, looking over at the kitchen threshold to see if Rome was about to pop in and ask why Maggie was talking about he and I making out. To my relief, after a few moments, I was convinced he hadn’t heard and wasn’t coming in any time soon.

“Ha! You did!” Maggie smiled, her eyes lighting up in a way that always made me just a bit happier. “I always knew you guys would have some sort of relationship deeper than friendship one day. It’s been obvious since you were around thirteen. And he’s always cared for you. Everyone saw this coming, that’s for sure—,”

“Maggie.” I stopped her embarrassing rant, trying to save myself from a heart attack. “You always said that you didn’t want Rome and me to get married. So don’t pretend that now you’re all—,”

“No, Julie. I didn’t want you to end up like my sister. Your mother changed after business moved into her life.” Aunt Maggie paused, a far off look in her eyes. “If you knew your mother around the time that she died, and back before she and your father got into the business profession, you wouldn’t believe she was the same person.” Maggie stopped again, to focus her eyes on me. “She and your father were so in love. Everyone knew it, even though they tried to pretend they hated each other. Your dad worked for my dad before your parents dated, and there was always a tension between them.”

Enthralled by the story, I didn’t dare breathe or look away. No one ever told stories about my parents that dealt with their love life.

“Your mom would always sabotage something your dad was working on to get him in trouble by our father. But usually, your grandfather would just laugh at the whole thing. He saw what everyone else saw. The only people who didn’t know they were in love were themselves,” Maggie said, finishing off her thought with a sigh. There were a few moments of silence, until she began speaking again.

“But of course they got married and started up a business with the Maddens. And Jules, this was a long time ago. Back when they were in their early twenties. You know your parents got married when they were twenty and twenty one, right?” I nodded, aware that sometime in my life the fact had been mentioned to me. I held in a laugh, thinking of how I spit out the drink I was drinking when I was told. “Well, the business took off, and their relationship couldn’t keep up. I don’t know the specifics, because I didn’t live with them, and your mother stopped talking to me about things like that. Julie… I just don’t want you to change after you really get involved with the company like your mother. It was the saddest thing I’ve ever had to watch.”

I swallowed hard, unsure of what to say. I twisted my thumbs around each other in front of me, strangely feeling nervous.

“But, I don’t think you’ll change that much. Maybe you’ll grow up a little more…” As Maggie trailed off, I looked up at her, a disbelieving expression on my face. “And maybe not.” We laughed, and just like that, the tension was released.

“Well, how about I go check on Robert?” I proposed, feeling as though I’d been too distant from him my whole life. I knew I couldn’t make up for lost time in whatever time was left, but I’d sure try in vain.

“Give him a couple of minutes. He went to use the bathroom when I left him. Damn fool won’t let me help him…,” Maggie muttered, shaking her head. She began to scrub dishes again, with new vigor. I pursed my lips, shaking my head at her hypocrisy.

“Yeah… isn’t that funny? When people don’t take offered help because of pride?” A silence settled after the words accidentally slipped through my lips. Maggie had stopped her scrubbing and stood idly still, staring at her sudsy hands. “Maggie—,”

“Jules?” Rome’s voice interrupted mine at the perfect time, before I babbled and something to my aunt that I was gonna regret. Upon inspection, I found Rome standing in the door of the kitchen, an amused quirk to his lips.

Oh god.

How much of our conversation had he heard?

“Uh… what?” I answered, trying to hide my panicky expression. I must’ve failed, or I had something on my face, for Rome’s smile only broadened. A sick feeling spread through my stomach, and I immediately frowned. Maggie and her big mouth….

“Something’s here to see you,” Rome said, and his smile abruptly disappeared. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion. One, he said something. Two, his amusement vanished. And three, who, or what, was here for me?

“Um… okay, then,” I muttered, taking my chance to leave the kitchen and its awkwardness. As I made my way to the front door, I pondered over the possibility of Rome overhearing mine and Maggie’s conversation. Embarrassment immediately filled me, and the color of my cheeks deepened just thinking about it.

“Julie!” I looked up, extremely surprised to see Jeremy coming in and closing the front door.

“Hey, Jeremy! What are you doing here?” I said, trying to hide the accusing tone in my voice. It felt weird to be around Jeremy for some reason, now that Rome and I had…

The fake smile plastered to my face shook as I tried to rid my brain of any thoughts retaining to the K word.

“You said I could visit any time! So… tada! Here I am,” Jeremy said, throwing his arms in the air. I did a once over on him, noting that he was wearing jeans and a navy blue pullover that complimented his blonde hair nicely. Speaking of his hair, it was getting longer, and nearly hung over in his pale green eyes. Rome and Jeremy, I realized, were stark opposites. While Rome was sophisticated, sexy, mature, and dark haired as much as dark eyed, Jeremy was childish, boyish, and donned light hair packaged with light eyes.

“Tada…,” I offered weakly, still in shock that Jeremy was at my house so soon after I’d just seen him. And so soon after Rome and I had…

“What’s wrong? Should I not have come?” Jeremy looked concerned now, and guilt spread through my body. Sighing, I walked towards him and gave him a tight hug, hopefully filling the hole that loneliness caused. He ridiculed Rome often enough about his solitude, but I knew Jeremy had enough issues of his own on that particular subject. And I didn’t want either men to go through that.

“No, it’s completely fine. I’m sorry for making you think otherwise,” I said, leaning back to look up at him. He was gazing down at me, a small smile on his face, although not sad. His expression made my grip on his waist loosen slightly. It was almost as though…

No.

“So good to see you, Jeremy!” Maggie’s voice wafted through the front room, giving me an excuse to let Jeremy go without seeming like I thought he had managed to come down with a serious case of the bubonic plague. As I stood to the side with my arms crossed tensely over my chest, Maggie came and hugged him, looking genuinely true to her words. Now why couldn’t I be happy to see him?

I felt like such a major asshole.

“You too, Mags. How’s Robert doing?” At Jeremy’s question, Rome made an appearance in the doorway, leaning against it and mirroring my stance. He wasn’t looking at me, however. Rome’s heated gaze rested on Jeremy, as though he was waiting for one wrong move by the latter, to give reason to pounce.

“He’s all right, I suppose. Not feeling too well. But what can you really expect?” Maggie said, offering a weak smile to us all. No one was fooled, I’m sure. I swallowed, trying to wet my dry throat, wanting to wrap Robert up and hold him away from the world, to make sure he was okay. I know I couldn’t do that, or anything, really, to help him. “Well… why are we all standing here? Come to the living room, Jeremy. It’s warmer in there.”

As Jeremy passed me, I noticed him staring at me with concern, as though he sensed my unease. I gave him a smile, trying to mask any sort of negative emotions that threatened to show in the smallest of lines on my face. Everyone, these days, seemed to be able to read me. It didn’t seem all together fair, since I could barely read anyone by their expressions. Well, any time I actually wanted to read someone, I couldn’t.

“Do you want anything? Coffee, hot cocoa?” Maggie offered to Jeremy as he sat down on the couch. I settled on standing off to the side, beside Rome, who looked less than thrilled at the arrival of our guest. I sighed, running a hand down my face. Where was the remote with the fast-forward button when you desperately needed it?

“No, no, I’m fine,” Jeremy said, pausing. He looked hesitant, and my suspicions towards his purpose for coming here slowly grew. “Actually, I wanted to talk to Julie.” A beat of silence. “Alone.” As I swallowed hard, Rome stiffened considerably beside me. By his intake of breath, I knew he wasn’t going to be put down without a fight.

“Oh? Alright then, dear. I need to go check up on Robert anyways. You kids don’t get into anything,” Maggie warned playfully, waving a hand at us as she left the living room and headed towards her bedroom where Robert was resting.

She left behind an excruciatingly awkward silence, were the three of us — Jeremy, Rome, and myself — just sat in the living room, avoiding eye contact. Well, strike that. Rome was still glaring at Jeremy.

“Rome? Do you mind?” Jeremy broke the silence, his words colder than the snow topping the ground just outside. I glanced over at Rome, whose angry expression hadn’t let up in the slightest since the moment he’d walked into the room.

“Yes. I do.” Rome’s tone was equally as cruel, and I instantly sensed a fight. A real one.

“Seriously, man? Just leave. I need to talk to Julie.” Jeremy deadpanned, clenching his jaw when Rome made no move to leave. My own anger welled up inside my stomach at how unfair the situation was. Why couldn’t Rome and Jeremy just get along? And why could I barely looked at Jeremy now that Rome and I had finally kissed? And what was with the look he was giving me earlier when we were hugging?

I huffed out a heavy breath, narrowing my eyes at the two men — if you could even call them that with their behavior — wishing they’d both just grow a dick and be real men.

“You two, please shut the hell up with all of your stupid fighting. It’s really annoying, and it’s starting to give me a headache.” I paused, looking between the two of them. They still looked infuriated. “You,” I started, pointing at Jeremy. “stop provoking Rome all the goddamn time. He’s probably sick of it, and hell, I’m sick of listening to it. And you,” I turned towards Rome. “Don’t fall for his stupid tricks. He’s pushing your buttons, and you’re allowing him to rile you up. Stop. And you can leave the room while Jeremy and I talk for a little bit. Capiche?”

Rome and I connected gazes, and we had a mini stare down. I finally softened my gaze, turning my expression into one of pleading. I didn’t want to listen to any arguing anymore. And I needed to fix things with Jeremy for good. Rome breathed out, and shook his head, but turned and left the room. Guilt spread through my skin at the way Rome’s face had fallen.

I never wanted to see that expression on his face again, I decided.

Finally, I directed my gaze to Jeremy, who was grinning at me. I rolled my eyes, and moved towards him to sit on the couch with him. Feelings of exasperation consumed me, and I fell into the abyss of the back of the couch. I heard Jeremy’s laugh, muffled by the cloth of the couch surrounding my face.

“Julie… I don’t even know where to begin.” I wanted to help him out with an immediate ‘then don’t,’ but… I didn’t want to hurt his feelings any more then I already had. “You’ve always managed to be there for me, even though I live like thirty minutes away from you.” Be there for him? “I know this is probably weird for you and all, since you’re blinded to everyone’s emotions sometimes—” Wow, thanks a lot. “—but I really need to tell you something. I mean, I’ve needed to tell you for a long time, and I just couldn’t seem to get the courage.” He paused, smiling. “But now I do.”

Oh. God. If this was what I thought it was… I was going to be sick.

“I love you.”

Long period of silence. I didn’t make eye contact.

“Julie? I love you. Like… more than a sister.”

My heart hammered hard in my chest, and my tongue and throat suddenly felt swollen. What the hell do I say to some nonsense like that?

“Well, I’m starving. How ‘bout some macaroni? You up for some macaroni?” I stood up abruptly, feeling slightly hysterical, and yet like my mind just cleared. Rome was right. Jeremy had liked me the same as Paris liked Juliet.

Earth, open up and swallow me whole.

“Wait, Juliet, what?” Jeremy said, grabbing a hold of my wrist, rooting me to my spot. To be honest, his tight grip began to gnaw at my skin, to the point that I want to rip my limb away from his hold violently, cradle it to my chest, and stick my tongue out at him. Whatever the case, at all costs, I wanted to avoid the previous sentences Jeremy had had the balls to say.

“I want macaroni. Do you?”

Jeremy gave me a long, hard look, as if scanning my brain for any sign of maturity. As he scrutinized me, I lowered my gaze, once again, to his hold on my wrist.

“Ming letting go, while you’re at it? That kinda huts, yo,” I muttered, adding a hint of humor to my words, all though any damned fetus could tell that I was avoiding the subject matter at hand. Jeremy’s grip loosened, but he didn’t let go completely. I rolled my eyes and stared off at the wall, avoiding his poring over my face. That was the thing about Rome that I loved, and the thing I hated about Jeremy. Rome was a gentleman at most times, and never wanted to hurt me. He would nearly always try to give me what I wanted if I really wanted something. Jeremy, however, couldn’t catch onto a hint, and did what he wanted, when he wanted. Like say something stupid along the lines of “I love you.”

I mean, what the hell is that.

“Julie, please sit down.” Jeremy’s voice was soft now, and the hurt coated over it like chocolate on ice cream made my heart nearly stop. I felt guilt to the top of my head to the tips of my toes, but I didn’t know what else to do. Man. I was a bitch. I knew it, and I couldn’t change it. Not in that situation. What had to be done, must’ve been done.

However, I sat down again like he’d asked, hoping that he’d take my example and use it, and do what I asked. Finally, to my greatest level of relief, he let go of my damned wrist. Immediately, I drew it back and massaged it with my other hand. The skin was sore and raw, and I knew I’d feel that for a while. No matter if he didn’t mean to harm me; he did, whether it was intentional or not.

“I understand this must be extremely weird for you and all, since you’re… engaged—” He practically spat, “to Rome. But if I understand correctly, you only see him as a brother, right?” Jeremy asked, eyebrows raised, an expression similar to that of the puppy who gets left last in the ‘free puppies’ box on the corner street, when someone walks by or stops to look.

Ohhh shit.

“Uhh…,” I muttered intelligently, feeling about as good as a snail with a salt shaker over his head. Anything I said that was the truth was going to shatter that hopeful look on Jeremy’s face. Sullenly, I shifted my gaze to the floor, exhaling heavily. “Look, Jeremy—”

“You can’t blame me for falling for you, Jules. I mean, you’re perfect. Gorgeous, funny, nice, smart… Rome is an idiot for not making a move on you before. Good thing you’re not going to a public school. You’d probably have turned into one of those really popular girls, and they might’ve just corrupted my perfect Julie.” I looked up at his calling me his Julie. I was pretty shocked at this point, but if there was one thing I did know, it’s that I didn’t belong to Jeremy. “And I know I’m sorta just dropping this all on you at once like a bomb, but I knew I had to tell you while I got the courage. Cause there I was, sitting at home alone, on friggin’ Christmas day, for Christ sakes, and naturally I started to think about you. And your beautiful blue eyes and your long gorgeous hair. And I knew. I knew I needed to tell you how I really felt, before someone else finally came to their senses and confessed—”

He was rambling, and I was only half listening. The weight of his words pressed on my heart and lungs, and breathing became a strenuous task. Why was Jeremy doing this? To himself? To me? To our friendship?

“—not to mention that we’ve known each other since—”

“Jeremy, shut up,” I said abruptly, cutting off whatever new rant he was allowing to spill out of his mind without thinking. “What are you doing?” I said, noticing how harsh my voice sounded. I softened my expression as best as I could, but there were no promises, considering I was starting to feel extremely pissed off. He was going to ruin our friendship. Without a doubt, if he didn’t stop spitting out lies and bullshit, he was going to spoil everything we’d ever had together.

“I’m… I mean… wait. What are you doing?” He retaliated, his face clouding with something that I didn’t want to identify.

“I asked you first.”

“And I asked you second. Congrats. We can count.”

“Jeremy, stop being a stupid asshole.” Finally, he didn’t try to strike back with a witty remark. He waited for me to continue. “Why are you trying to ruin our friendship by making it out to be more than it is?” Jeremy swallowed and lowered his gaze to the floor. “Shit. I didn’t mean that to come out so rude. I mean, Jeremy, you know I love you, but in the complete, utter, wholly sense of a brother. And I’m sorry if that’s not what you want from me, but that’s all I’m willing to give. Especially since Rome and I—,” I abruptly cut myself off, my eyes bulging out at what I was about to say. I resisted the urge to either slap my hand over my mouth, or just slap myself at the extensive stupidity I was exhibiting. Jeremy’s head snapped up, and his eyes narrowed.

“Since you and Rome what?” He spat, his light green eyes darkening. My forehead wrinkled up, and I resisted the sudden urge to cry. My chin began to tremble, and I had to bite my lip to control my freaking tear ducts. “Since you and Rome what, Julie?!” Jeremy exclaimed after my lack of answer, louder than necessary. I cowered down under his anger, wishing to God that I could just rewind and never let Jeremy in my house. So that I could call him up later and tell him that I may or may not have feelings for Rome, and that I appreciated Jeremy being such a good friend. A good brother. Emphasizing how I so did not love him.

“Me and Rome… we… I mean, I don’t even really understand…,” I stammered like an idiot, cause my already flaming cheeks to burn more intensely. “Jeremy, I’m so sorry,” I whispered, looking up at him, tears building up in my eyes, no matter how hard I tried to hold them back. “I’m so sorry.”

“I hate that goddamned asshole. He knew I loved you. I know he knew it. And yet he still played you and put you under his spell. Christ, Julie. I didn’t think you’d fall for him. I thought you were smarter than that.” His face softened the tiniest bit. “Why couldn’t you have been smarter than that?” He rubbed a hand down his face. Jeremy looked about ten years older than he actually was at that moment. “Now I’ll never have a chance. I was too late.”

“Now it feels like things will never be the same,” I stated, inhaling slowly. I angrily swiped away a descending tear, a frown forming on my lips. “Why the hell,” I paused, throwing an arm in the air. “would you come here and ruin everything we’ve ever had with each other? Why? I mean, come on, I know I’m not that great. You probably don’t even love me. It’s just… you need to find some more people to hang out with, Jerm. You’re a great guy. You could have millions of friends. Millions of other people to interact with. Many other girls to like.”

“But I don’t want many other girls, Jules. I want you.” And then Jeremy did something that I’d never, ever forget. And it wasn’t one of those good memories.

He grabbed the back of my neck, pulled me closer to him, and kissed me.

Square on the lips.

Shock completely took over my body for a few seconds, and I sat frozen still, eyes as wide as they could possibly be. It took a few more moments to my senses to flood back to me, and as I mustered up as much energy as I could to push him away, a figure showed up in the doorway in my peripheral vision.

My strength had managed to actually knock Jeremy off the couch, so first, I looked at him, laying on the floor, staring up at me with a smirk. I knew I looked shocked, incredulous, and most of all, pissed. I moved my gaze over to the door, where I saw Rome, staring a me, his face in a crumpled, hurt expression.

Shit. Shit, shit, shit, for the one hundredth time that day.

“You’re a prick, Jeremy.” I furrowed my brow, swinging my head back over to the asshole sprawled on the floor. “I can actually say that I really hate you right about now.” That wiped that cocky expression right off Jeremy’s face. With no sympathy at all, I looked back over to Rome, who was now glaring at Jeremy. Glaring was an understatement for all the anger possessed by his gaze. I saw his jaw clench with a force I was sure could break his teeth, then he moved forward, into the room, to Jeremy.

Swiftly, and with an oddly effortless force, Rome grabbed Jeremy’s shirt, heaving him up onto his feet. There wasn’t a second that passed before Rome had swung back his fist, and landed Jeremy right in the face. And back down to the floor he went, this time clutching at his nose.

“God dammit, Rome! You broke my nose!” I barely heard Jeremy’s whining. All I could think about was how utterly wrong Jeremy’s lips had felt on mine, and how thankful I was that Rome beat him to it. My first kiss was one I’d never forget.

And that was an example of a good memory.