Clearly

There comes a time in every relationship where you just know that everything is right. There’s no questions about what the next day will hold or the possibility of your partner committing an act of infidelity. They love you and only you, and you them, and everything is perfect. Absolutely nothing can tear you down from that high because everything is so clear without requiring the use of my camera lens.

That’s how I felt as Pierce drove me home, my feet dangling in his lap haphazardly as I played with the fingers on his right hand—a hand he should have had on the wheel of the car, but my fingers were much too lonely and he had a whole other hand for steering. I felt free, no longer a skeleton in the back of Pierce’s closet, but a person in open existence that has laid his claim to what he is and where he belongs in the world—right by Pierce’s side. And I’ll be damned if anyone ever steals that spot away from me again.

And when that epiphany became so apparent to me, it made me realize that I had nothing to hide. This was Pierce—my boyfriend, my first love…my lover.

*

Pierce is such an understanding person, loving simplicity over complexity; he’s a man that lives for passion-filled moments of sincerity. That’s what made tonight so special.

It wasn’t one of those moments in the movie theaters that make you squirm uncomfortably in your seat because your parents are sitting right next to you. It’s not full of lust or forced sensuality for the entertainment of others. No articles of clothing that cover your most intimate of areas were strewn across the hallway floor in a fit of excitement that was barely covered up as passion. It was all real, not forced, and simple. Simple, just the way things should be when two people love each other.

To put it simply—it all started with a kiss.

Followed by another, than another, than one more before the kisses turned into a fire blazing within our veins as we wrapped our bodies around each other. Clothing was discarded with care, gently laid on the floor by shaking hands before said hands shook even more as they explored territory that was still so new to them. So new despite the fact that my body was his all along. So special—simply divine.

No words needed to be spoken, as if we were communicating on a wavelength all our own. Everything clicked. Every finger dragged down ones torso, every appendage that tangled with that of the other, every kiss and tug of a small clump of hair was in perfect synchronization, not one bump in the road.

And it all felt so good, so pure despite the act being committed. But that’s what Pierce was, right? Pure? A pure man possessing a pure heart to balance out his pure soul? A body that had never been loved before was ready to relinquish its hold and allow new things to happen. For its purity to be broken, despite all that Hunter had done to break it in the past.

My lips parted gently, my eyes squeezed shut as these brand new levels of ecstasy coursed through my veins. And for the first time, my strong soldier was just as vulnerable as I was. His head buried in my neck, our bodies moving together, worshipping each other for the very first time—that’s all that mattered. Mind, body, and soul all came together, function as one as we fought to learn where one of us began and the other one ended. We were one. Two halves of a single entity finally united after searching for each other for what could have been forever.

Gentle, so gentle, were his rough hands on my body. Yet, somehow, they were not. They dragged me into him, almost greedily, as his body beckoned mine closer on a cellular, physical, emotional level.

No sense could be found in this very moment. It was just me and him and him and I and us as a whole, together, at last.

We arched into each other simultaneously, our synchronization carrying us even deeper into the depths of pleasure as I fought the urge to allow his name to leave my lips, not wanting to ruin the passionate silence that had enveloped us at this very moment. The rustle of the sheets, the soft sliding of skin on skin, the desperate attempts to gain air back into our lungs as our lips closed over one another’s were all echoing around us, bombarding us from every direction—as if they were being blasted through a stereo and not a man so special to you that there wasn’t even a mere inch separating you from each other.

My angel was mine, all mine.

I threw my head back and screamed his name to the heavens as his melodic cries enveloped me whole. Warmth flowed through my veins as everything that was Pierce Gordon overwhelmed me and took me prisoner.

This was our moment.

*

I don’t understand how Pierce could look so vulnerable and angelic in his sleep, but be so big and imposing all at once. How could such a huge heart be trapped within a body, even a body as big as his? How could his hands be so gentle yet so rough all at once?

My cheeks reddened at the thought, my heart beating the tiniest bit harder as I traced my eyes over his naked body, feeling as if I was committing a crime at viewing something so gorgeous.

Even after what he had just done, my angel could still look so angelic—so pure.

A small gasp broke past my lips as Pierce’s lips parted slightly, his body angled itself in his sleep so that he was flat on his back, his flushed cheeks facing away from me as his legs opened just a fraction. He never understood how I saw him as angelic because he is never awake to view himself during such gloriously simple moments as this.

I leaned over the edge of the bed, pulling on the pair of pants that Pierce had brought me. The expensive fabric felt cool along my legs, a large contrast to the gentle and hot caress that had enveloped my body earlier. They hugged my short legs and rather large bottom, making me look like I did belong in Pierce’s world. Despite how hard I tried, I never really belong there, but I do now.

I walked over to Pierce’s side of the bed, smiling at him as I pulled the blanket over his left thigh, tucking it under that of his right to cover up the area of his body that only I could see. His milky skin was a gift from above and should be exploited; the way it stretched over his relaxed muscles and shaped him perfectly made me believe it was a sin to be so beautiful.

With another longing glance at his sinfully long fingers on his wonderfully large hands, his right one folded over his pelvic area as his left one lay facing the middle of the bed, as if it were waiting for me to hold it in my own, I left the room. I picked up the first camera in my study, a fresh roll of blank and white film loaded into it as I walked back into the bedroom and stood on a wobbly chair, promising myself that I wouldn’t fall.

I brought the camera up to my eyes, peering through the lens as I focused it on Pierce’s body. He looked like a flushed angel tangled up in loose bed sheets as if he had just fallen down from Heaven above and needed a night’s sleep to regain himself. All of his beauty shown through my lens as I angled my body to catch the perfect angle of his, my breath catching in my throat as I snapped a single photograph before climbing down.

As a triumphant smile passed my lips, I placed my camera on Pierce’s work desk.

For once, he can see himself for what he clearly is—an angel, a human being that has nothing but good flowing through his veins—just as I see him. For once, he won’t be able to argue with me.

It’s time that he learns what it’s like to see things clearly for what they are too.