Ignorance

"Hello, little bird."

I blinked up at the person speaking to me. I lowered my heart shaped sunglasses to glare up at them. The sun was shining directly behind their head, making it hard to recognize them. I leaned up on my right arm and held my left hand up to block the sun. I smiled up at Joseph, who stood their awkwardly. He rubbed the back of his head before smiling weakly down at me. He seemed to be trying his hardest not to stare at my pale stomach. He caught me in the moment of sunbathing. My black bikini top was untied on the back and my dark green knee length skirt was gathered up around my waist. I pushed my sunglasses back to the top of my head, where it got caught on my pink headband that was pushing all of my dark hair back.

"Hey, sweet thing," I grinned up at him.

"What's up?" he asked nervously.

"Jo, if you have something to ask me, ask me," I smiled.

"Do you want to get ice cream?" he asked quietly.

"Well, it depends."

"On?"

"Is this as friends or as a date?"

"How do you want it to be?" he asked.

"Doesn't matter. I just want ice cream."

"I thought you said it depends."

"I lied," I smiled widely before holding a hand up so he could help me up.

I held one arm across my chest so my top wouldn't fall off as I stood up. I straightened my skirt out with one hand. I stared down at myself, biting my lip as I did so, not sure how to tie my top. I started to turn around so Joseph couldn't see anything when he took a step forward.

"Here, I'll do it," he said.

I licked my lips nervously as I let go of the strings to hold my hair up. Joseph's fingertips brushed across my back softly before he quickly tied the strings of my bikini top. His hands brushed down my sides before settling on my hips. His hands lingered there for a few moments before he let me go and took a step back. I took a step forward, turned around, and smiled up at him before bending down to pick up my sandals and sliding them on.

"Okay, let's go," I smiled.

Joseph walked by my side as we walked through the hot sand on the beach. We walked in silence as we passed by small children making sandcastles, women sunbathing, and teenagers playing beach volleyball. I glanced up at Joseph through my sunglasses as we walked to catch him occasionally glancing down at me. I smiled to myself as my arm lightly brushed against his. I pulled my long hair up into a ponytail as we walked, feeling the perspiration on my neck as a slight wind passed by us. We walked up a few steps before reaching to the top of the boardwalk and walking down it. We passed various kiosks before reaching a stand that sold the ice cream.

"Do you still like the usual?" Joseph asked, looking down at the various flavors as he licked his own chocolate ice cream cone.

"Yes, sir," I smiled.

"You got it, babe. One vanilla ice cream cone with gummy worms on top, please," Joseph told the vendor.

"Sweet ice cream for your sweet girl," the vendor smiled at us as he handed the ice cream to me.

I smiled up at him and turned to get a few dollar bills out of the small woven bag that was wrapped around my waist. Joseph grabbed my hand before I could pull anything out of my bag. I stared up at him in confusion.

"What are you doing?"

"You said it didn't matter if it was a date or not. And on a date, the guy pays," Joseph said softly, leaning down to speak into my ear.

"Well, whatever floats your boat, dude," I shrugged before licking my ice cream.

He smiled down at me before he put his arm around my shoulder to guide me back to the beach. He chuckled at me as I viciously chomped a gummy worm off my ice cream and chewed on it viciously. After I swallowed it, I grinned up at him so widely that my eyes closed and my nose scrunched. He poked my nose with a smile on his face before licking his ice cream. He sighed in exasperation as my cell phone rang noisily from my small bag. He took his arm off my shoulders and took a step sideways so there was some space between us. I smiled apologetically at him before answering it.

"Yo yo yo, this is the food ho," I answered.

"That's...cool. Where are you?" Kai asked.

"On the boardwalk with Jo Jo. He bought me ice cream."

"Oh. That's nice," he said hesitantly.

"What's wrong?" I inquired.

"Nothing. Nothing's wrong. I just wanted to let you know that we're going to go to Target for you know what."

"Are you serious?" I squealed with excitement.

"Serious as cereal, babe. Grab your shit and Joseph's and come find us."

"Okay, Kai, I'm coming," I laughed as I emphasized the last word.

"Oh, my darling little virgin, how I love you."

"Ha! If Noel is a virgin, than I'm Mother Theresa," I heard Hero yell.

"Well, then, it's nice to meet you, madre," Kai said, sounding somewhat distant from the phone.

"I'll meet you all at the bus."

"Okay. Joseph and all them are coming with us."

"Ooh, so it's a group orgasm. I like."

"Grow up, babe," Kai stated before hanging up.

I tucked my phone away before turning towards Joseph, who was slowly licking his ice cream and looking down at me with no expression on his face. I gave him a wide smile before grabbing his pale hand in mine.

"So what's up?" he asked.

"We are going to play the best game ever. Come on, all of you are riding with us in the tour bus," I said as I guided him off the boardwalk.

"Where are we going?"

"You'll see," I smiled.

We were walking for a few minutes off the beach into a local parking. We finally reached the bus, where the other boys from Joseph's band were standing outside. They were all staring up at the large bus in awe, with their eyes wide and jaws open. I stared at them in confusion as I walked past them and through the open door into the bus. I smiled at Mark as I passed him and Divine, who was lounging on the couch. I threw my bag on the floor by the couch before sitting on it with Divine, placing my legs on top of her lap. She rubbed my leg for a few seconds as she read her magazine before putting it down and staring at me.She looked at me for a moment before furrowing her eyebrows and looking out the window.

"They never walked in, did they?" she asked me.

I furrowed my own eyebrows before standing up and crossing the bus to open a window. I looked down at Girl on Fire, who was still staring at the bus in awe. After they still didn't pay attention to me when I cleared my throat, I reached over and grabbed a ball of paper and threw it at them, though it ended up hitting Ethan on the head. He blinked once in surprise before reaching up to rub his forehead.

"Are you guys coming in or what?" I asked with a smile before leaning back inside and closing the door.

Ever so slowly, all five of the boys boarded the bus. They stared around at the bus in amazement, soaking in all the things we had just in the front space of the bus. I turned around to see what they were staring at, which was the mostly stainless steel kitchen and large round table that was placed diagonal from the kitchen. Divine looked at me in amusement as she slowly placed her magazine back on her lap. Hero noisily slammed open the bathroom door and took a step out, blinking in surprise at the sight of Girl on Fire in our dining area.

"Umm...okay. Hey, why don't you guys come in the back with the rest of us? It's pretty cool back here," he smiled before turning around to walk through a curtain and to the back.

I smiled at the guys before following Hero as Divine stood up on her knees on the chair to watch them follow me. We had to pass the sleeping area to get to the back that Hero was talking about. I turned around when I realized that the guys had stopped once again.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Eighteen bunk beds?" Arik asked.

"Yeah?" I said uncertainly.

"Eighteen bunk beds?" he asked again.

"Yeah," I laughed. "Come on."

I opened the door the backroom and walked in, causing Kai to take his hand off his controller to let me sit on his lap. The guys stood in amazement from the doorway as they witnessed Tithe playing a game from the X-Box on the large television.

"You have an X-Box?" Ethan asked excitedly.

"And a Play Station 2," Hero said absently as he pointed to the corner where it was stored.

I smiled up at them before standing up and walking past them back into the sleeping area. I pulled myself up into my own bunk and rolled over on to my stomach to stare down at them.

"This is your tour bus?" Arik asked. I nodded.

"Jealous!" Ethan yelled with a grin.

"We only have an eight-passenger van with a carry-on trailer," Ricky explained.

"Ohh. Man, I remember those times. Damn, that was hell," I nodded.

"You seem used to this life," Ben said.

"This life, as in a rock star's life, or this life, as in a huge tour bus life," I asked him.

"Both."

"It was easy getting used to the bus. After spending so long not eating, not showering, not sleeping right. This bus was like a miracle to us. And I've been with rock stars since I was sixteen years old, Ben. A girl gets used to it," I said as I looked at him straight in the eye.

He stared into my eyes for a few moments before looking away with an uncomfortable look on his face. I blinked once before turning to give a small smile at Ricky. I could feel the jolts of the bus moving against the dark pavement of the road as we neared the closest Target. Divine walked past the sleeping area with a white mug in her hand. She took a sip of the tea before stopping and turning around. She leaned against the bunks and placed a lounging arm near my leg.

"Do they know the rules, kid?" she asked me.

"They should, they taught me the game," I said as I nodded towards them.

"Did they?" she asked as the turned towards the guys with a smile on her face. "Well, thank you for that."

"For what?" Ethan asked as she turned to walk away.

"It's your game, Ethan," I told him with a meaningful look on my face.

He stared at me in confusion before his face slowly started to contort into happiness. "Are you serious?" he asked.

"Serious as cereal," I nodded.

"Dude, I haven't played that since...well, since I was nineteen."

"Hope you still remember the rules, honey pie!" I exclaimed as I jumped out of my bunk. "We're going to be in location in five minutes."

I reached up into a separate bunk to grab my suitcase. I pulled out a pair of bright blue pants and a black tank top, along with my black converse that had blue paint splattered on them and my new charm bracelet. I folded them into my arms before standing upright to stare at them properly.

"Prepare yourselves while I get properly dressed," I said as I walked out.

I walked into the bathroom to get changed in my new outfit. While in the bathroom, I touched up my black eyeliner and put on my standard black lipstick. I folded my old clothes in my arms and threw them into my bunk before walking to the front, where all the guys had moved to. I grabbed a brush off a chair and slowly started to comb out my hair. Kai roughly sat down next to me and put his arm on the headrest of the chair I was sitting on. I subconsciously leaned against him as I brushed my hair, not even paying attention to the looks I was getting from certain people on the bus.

"Mark, how much longer?" Divine asked into a small walkie talkie that was attached to the wall as she didn't even bother to look up from her magazine.

"Ten minutes top, baby girl. Could be way less with the lack of traffic," Mark's voice came from the small speaker.

Divine nodded as she reached up to put the walkie talkie in its holder. She slowly turned the page, her eyes lighting up at whatever was on the page. Hero was sitting on top of the kitchen counter, throwing pieces of cereal in his mouth, ignoring the pieces that flew past his face or on to his lap.

"Heroin Biley, I swear to God, you better pick up that mess you're making because nobody else is. And I won't tolerate a mess on this bus," I said as I squeezed past him to grab an apple out the fridge.

"Got it, mama," he nodded as he wiped the cereal pieces on the the counter and then wiped them off with a napkin.

"Mama?" Ethan asked from one of the chairs up front.

"If it's not me, nobody will. Toby likes to say he's a parental figure but he's a male so he's pretty much useless," I said as I cut up the apple into slices.

"Stop talking shit, Blondie," Toby muttered as he squeezed past me to sit by Divine.

"You've racked up a few odd nicknames over the past few years, Ani," Joseph stated as he turned in his seat to look at me.

"That's for sure," I laughed as I sprinkled some chili powder on top of the apple slices.

"Chili with apples?" Arik asked incredulously.

"Oh, my God, it is so good. Divine made me eat cucumber slices with lemon juice and chili powder and it was amazing so I tried it with apples and it is seriously a spicy orgasm in the mouth. I swear," I said after I took a bite and sat down by Kai, putting my feet up on his lap.

"You would know what an orgasm in the mouth tastes like," Hero said from the kitchen, his mouth full of cereal.

"Thanks to you, babe," I smirked before winking at him.

"Ooh," he cooed. "Are we finally going public on that, doll?"

"I can't deny my urges for you anymore, Hero. I need you to take me, here and now," I said sarcastically.

"Darling, you might not want to say things like that," he said huskily as he bent down in front of me so his face was in mine. "You never know what I might do."

"Heroin Biley, if you touch her, you're finding your own way to the next venue," Divine said, not bothering to look up from her magazine.

"How come Kai gets to touch her?" he asked as he straightened up.

"Because we know Kai's intentions with her. And sadly, we know yours too. Kai automatically wins on that," Toby said.

"And to be quite frank, they look cuter together," Divine smiled.

"Oh shit, Divine and Toby agreed on it. It's fate, Noel," Kai laughed.

"Oh well, then, if Divine and Toby said it," I said sarcastically.

"So you agree!" Kai exclaimed with a large smile.

I rolled my eyes at him before pushing him off of me. I turned around to give a smile to Ricky who was laughing silently and shaking his head. I stood up to grab a rubber band off the table before pulling my thick hair up into a high, messy ponytail. I walked back and forth in the front area of the bus for a few minutes, ignoring the small brushes of skin on my hands coming from various boys on the bus. I didn't like the idea of boys who I considered friends liking me. I knew I had strong feelings for Ben but that was years ago and I had no idea how I felt about him currently. I knew Joseph liked me years ago and he very well may have liked me still but while he was gorgeous, I couldn't see him as more than a friend. And Kai was Kai. He was my best friend, my lover, my brother, my father. I knew I would always love Kai. Regardless if we were together as a couple or not, I knew I would love him in some sort of the way and he felt the same way for me. I folded my arms uncomfortably before standing next to Ricky, who was leaning against the counter in the kitchen. He stared at me with an understanding look on his face before adjusting his beanie and leaning his head on my shoulder.

"It'll get worse before it gets better," he whispered to me.

"I know. I just want to get the worst part over with fast."

He looked up at me before smiling and looking away. His face perked up at the feeling of the bus slowing down and the large Target sign outside the window. I grinned widely at Ethan who was hopping excitedly in his seat while the other boys in Girl on Fire slowly started to realize what was about to happen. The bus slowly came to a stop in the parking lot and Mark turned around in his seat.

"Get out of my bus, brats," he said with a smile.

"Don't go there, Mark," Divine laughed as she stood up and walked off the bus. Everyone got up and followed her out. They stood in the lot, squinting against the sun.

"Don't forget to say olly olly oxen free if you give up," I said as I walked off the bus.

"We know the rules, Noel," Hero said.

"Oh really?" I asked slyly as he nodded. "Okay. So...one, two, three, not it!"

"Fuck you," he claimed as I laughed.