Apparition

Chapter 13: Soap Opera
The next morning I woke up at my usual time: four thirty. I still wasn’t used to my dreams and that was because I was frightened of them. It was hard to think that there was a time where I was able to sleep more than five hours and the dreams were like breathing to me. Now they were the most horrible things on the planet.
I poured myself a tall glass of coffee and turned on the TV to the morning news. This was my everyday morning schedule. I was never the one to drink caffeine but I had to stay awake some way. To tell the truth drinking coffee and watching TV in the early morning was the complete opposite of me. I thought coffee was vile and watching TV was a waste of time.
I sat in front of the TV until nine o’clock. By that time my parents already left for work and Jayant was already at my house to babysit Jonathon and Nicolette since it was the weekend and the daycare they went to wasn’t open on weekends.
“Natalia, do you want a grilled cheese sandwich?” Jayant asked from the kitchen. I didn’t know he’d talk to me since what happened yesterday. He probably already forgave me. I had a lot of leeway since the incident a couple months ago but people slowly started me treating like everyone else which I was happy for.
“We should poison it,” Nicol said and laughed out loud from the kitchen.
I ignored her. “No. The coffee filled me up,” I responded.
Jayant walked into the TV room with a grilled cheese sandwich. He held it out for me to take. “It was a rhetorical question. Take it.”
I rolled my eyes and took the plate from him.
He sat next to me and took a bite of his sandwich.
“Eat,” he pressed.
I nibbled on the crust. “Happy?”
“Why are you watching these morning soap opera’s?” He asked and laughed. “Do you even understand what this is about?”
I shook my head but my eyes stayed on the TV.
“Harlie watches this every morning when she has the time. She dreams about someday being on a soap opera for a part time job while she modeled.”
“These shows are always twisted to a point where it’s to confusing to even make the effort to fathom the situation.”
“Try focusing on the show then you’ll get it.”
I looked at him in a weird way.
“Harlie watches them all the time! It’s rubs off,” he said in defense.
I laughed. “Sure, Jayant.”
I grabbed the remote to turn up the volume.
The setting was in a very high class living room with a huge fire place, a mahogany rug with beautiful classic print, there were dark brown sofa’s, tall house plants, and the walls were a beige-almond color.
The camera’s were focused directly on their faces to show their exaggerated expressions.
“Miranda, you can’t keep denying the facts,” the handsome, brown-haired man said.
The camera switch in on Miranda who looked away from him as she began crying. Miranda had shoulder-length dark brown her and a sweet face with grey eyes. Both of them were somewhere around their twenties.
“Look at me. Miranda, look at me,” he said and brought Miranda’s face up to his. The camera showed the both of them now. “What you had with Cameron was great but he left you, Miranda. You can’t keep holding on to him. You know you can let him go if you wanted to.”
“What if I don’t want to let him go, Ryan? What if there’s something deep inside me that knows that what I had with Cameron isn’t over? He left me-I can’t deny that but the reason he did it is what I don’t understand. I know that fire between Cameron and I is still there. It’s always hard to put out a fire.”
“How about our fire. You can’t deny that you don’t love me,” Ryan said, wiping a tear from the corner of Miranda’s eye.
“I do love you, Ryan but I don’t love you the way I love Cameron. Cameron is special to me.”
“And what am I to you?” Ryan yelled, suddenly angry. “A piece of trash? A piece of tape to hold yourself together while your glue wasn’t there?!”
Wow. The dialogue used a lot of metaphors.
“Ryan don’t you understand? You’ve always been there for me and I’ve been there for you! It’s what friends do! If for some reason you thought that I was using you for my own benefit, then I’m sorry. I-I have to go.” Miranda turned around and headed for the door.
Ryan came up from behind her, spun her around, and kissed her. For a couple seconds it looked like Miranda was actually into it but when she became sane again she pushed him off and slapped him on his right cheek with a gasp.
She turned around and headed out the door.
“Miranda, come back!” Ryan called, desperation in his voice. “I love you,” he whispered.
Then it went to commercial.
“Wow,” I laughed. “Ryan is obviously obsessed with Miranda.”
“But what you don’t know is that Miranda is secretly obsessed with Ryan, too.”
“Are you kidding me? Miranda seems deeply in love with Cameron.”
“Are you two actually talking about a lame-o soap opera?” Nicol asked with food in her mouth as she walked into the room with Jon right behind her.
“Oh! Uhm… I’m not. I was just… playing along with Natalia,” Jayant said.
“Mmhmm. Sure,” she said and plopped onto the couch. Jon sat down next to her.
After the commercial was over a preview for the next episode played.
Ryan and Miranda were standing in the rain, drenched from head to toe. Miranda was wearing a black dress that was sticking to her body. Her hair was supposed to be up but was dripping all over the place and her mascara was running down her face either from crying or from the rain. Ryan was in an expensive looking tuxedo, his hair falling in front of his face that had a look of desperation.
“Miranda, what do I have to do to make you love me the way I love you?” Ryan begged.
“There is nothing you can do!” Miranda yelled. “There is no way that I’m ever going to get over Cameron. Why can’t you just accept that?”
Ryan stepped forward and held Miranda close to him. “Because I know it isn’t true,” he murmured.
“Aw. Well isn’t that just adorable,” Nicol said, sarcasm was thick in her voice.
“Doesn’t it just absorb you?” Jayant asked.
I shrugged my shoulders. I stopped believing romance a long time ago but I was pretty sure if I still thought it existed in my world I would’ve thought it was the most romantic thing in the world.
“So, what’re you doing today? Any plans?”
I sighed. “I was thinking about Lawren. Maybe I should go apologize.”
“I noticed that you’re the one always apologizing even when you’re the one who didn’t do anything.”
I shrugged my shoulders again and went upstairs to get dressed.
I threw on a pair of jeans and a plain blue shirt.
“Jayant, I’m leaving now!” I called as I walked down the stairs.
“Alright!” He called. “We’re going to be at my house just in case you want to know.”
“Okay!” When I opened the front door, Lawren was standing there right about to knock on the door.
He smiled.
I smiled back awkwardly.
“Can we talk?” He asked.
“Uhm… sure. I was just about to go over to your house to do the same.”
I let him into the house and we stood in my small living room awkwardly.
“Have a seat,” I said, breaking the silence. He sat on the sofa in front of the TV and I sat next to him.
He had another moment of silence before we began our conversation.
Lawren inhaled. “I’m sorry,” he said as he let out the air. “I should’ve have been so insensitive-”
“No, no, no,” I interrupted. “I shouldn’t have blown up on you like that. I know I’m not the most exciting person to be around anymore but it’s just that for some reason I’m still stuck in the past. By now I should be over it but it’s just that there’s something deep down inside me that’s telling me that what I had with… Nathan… isn’t over.” I winced as I said his name.
Lawren thought before he spoke. He was probably finding words that wouldn’t offend me but trying to be honest with me at the same time. Then Nicolette ran down the stairs followed by Jonathon and Jayant.
“Oh!” Jayant said. “You’re still here,” he said but it wasn’t a question. “We’ll just be leaving now.” He pushed Nicol and Jon to the door.
“It looks like I’m going to win the bet,” Nicol said to Jon as they were pushed through the door by Jayant.
“He’s coming back,” Jon whispered as he looked back at me.
Jayant turned around to look at me then winked.
I grinned at him and waved.
After we heard them drive away we continued with our conversation.
Lawren was about to speak but I stopped him. “Lawren, you don’t have to worry about hurting my feelings. I promised myself earlier that I wouldn’t take what you said to me too personally but remember, this isn’t the time to explode with your opinions. You may continue.”
“Natalia, I may never experience the pain and loss you’re in but I don’t have to be a genius to know that… you lost the best thing that has ever happened to you,” his voice went down to a whisper. “What you had with him was wonderful. Everyone was able to see that. But sometimes things just come into our lives just to walk back out. You never know who’s going to leave until they actually do. Have you ever wondered why I never left you?”
“But you have,” I reminded him. I didn’t realize I was crying until Lawren reached forward and wiped a tear from my cheek.
“But I eventually came back to you, Natalia,” he whispered fiercely, my face in his hands. “I could never forget about the best thing that has ever happened to me. We have our fights but in the end we’re always coming back for each other. When we think we’re ready to give up on each other we stand back up and help each other to get back on our feet. I won’t stop bothering you until I know you’re firmly on your feet. I’m your best friend and that’s what I’m here for.”
I wanted to say something. Anything. But I couldn’t so I jumped up and gave him a hug as tears still flowed down my face and onto his shirt. “You have no idea how much you mean to me,” I whispered as I cried.