Apparition

Chapter 8: Uncontrollable
I didn’t sleep. I didn’t eat. I didn’t talk. I just laid in his bed all day. Sometime during the day, I didn’t know when, Jayant and my parents came over. Probably Keith called them to come pick me up. When my dad tried to carry me out of the bed I clutched the headboard and refused to move. My whole family ended up spending the night in Nathan’s room with me but as they slept I stayed awake. Even if I was capable of falling asleep I wouldn’t dare to. I knew what would happen if I fell asleep and now there was no way to prevent that.
I no longer had a tranquilizer. It was just like before…. I would soon be out of control.
My parents didn’t go to work the next day and I didn’t go to school. I stayed in the room that eventually become stuffy and smelly from what I heard. I also heard that I smelled of wet dog. It was probably because I hadn’t bathed since before Prom night. Of course I didn’t notice the smell since I was the one emitting it.
“Natalia, dear. You have to eat something,” my mom murmured in worry. She had set a tray down on the bedside table an hour ago that contained a now lukewarm bowl of soup and a stagnant glass of water.
I didn’t respond but just kept my eyes on the window like they were glued to the same spot.
“Natalia, why are you doing this? I can’t stand to see you in such a mess.”
I didn’t respond.
“Is there anything I can do? Anything anyone can do?”
This time I wanted to respond but I couldn’t. I would’ve said: “Yes! Find my Nathan. Sarah can help.”
“How about you at least bathe and get a change of clothes?”
I would’ve said: “I wouldn’t mind that.”
She sighed. “I’ll leave you to be. Your father and I wont be too far. We’re just a door down, alright? If you need anything just call.” She examined me. “Or make a noise.”
I didn’t respond and she stroked my cheek. “I love you baby.” She leaned down and kissed me on my forehead.
My mom stood up and walked out the door, shutting it silently behind her.
“How is she?” I heard Keith ask in a low voice from the other side of the door.
My mom sighed. “Not to great. She isn’t eating, speaking, or showing any emotion. She hasn’t even cried. I feel like I’m speaking to myself.”
“I don’t know what triggered his departure. It was so sudden and so random.”
“Isn’t there a way to get in contact with him? Sarah!” My mom said with a burst of knowledge. “Can’t she help? She’s some sort of… tracker, right?”
Yes, yes! I thought in my head.
“Nathan clearly wrote that he wouldn’t like to be tracked down. Nathan asked many things from Sarah but she never gave him what he wished even if it were the littlest things. She feels that she should obey his last wish to her as a way of apologizing.”
“I can’t stand to see her like this! Isn’t there something you can do?”
Keith was silent for a moment then spoke. “I can put an image into her head. An image that makes her happy.”
“Anything but an image of him,” she murmured. “It would make her happy to see him once more but once the image is gone it might be an “on” switch to something worse and I can’t bear to see this get any worse.”
If I was able to speak I’d say: “No! I don’t need help! If this was going to be there way to prop me up, it wasn’t going to work.”
“Is there anything else that makes her happy? A place? A type of food? A time in her life? A person?”
My mom thought. “Lawren. He’s her best friend. Whenever they’re together he always manages to put a smile on her face. Well… before she knew what she was of course.”
“Should we try it now?” He asked.
“The sooner the better.”
They opened the door and walked around the bed to face me.
“How are you, Natalia?” Keith asked happily.
I felt like I was a patient in a mentally defected hospital.
“I’m not crazy!” Was what I wanted to say but my mouth wouldn’t open and my brain wouldn’t find the words.
Keith bent down to look me in the eye but my mom stayed standing next to him to watch him work his magic.
Keith smiled at me and tilted his head to the left.
Suddenly my mind was filled with pictures and pictures was the only thing I was able to see. They were pictures of Lawren and some of Lawren and me. The pictures went from the days we first met in kindergarten to the night of Prom when I danced with him.
I shut my eyes and started to shake my head. At first slowly but then it grew into vigorous shaking of my whole body and my eyes were squeezed shut.
“Natalia, stop!” My mom shrieked.
My dad and Sarah came running into the room.
“Hold her down!” Sarah cried.
Each of them took one leg or arm. I struggled to free myself but they were too strong or maybe I was just too weak. I banged the back of my head on the pillow constantly as I screamed.
“Let me go!” I yelled. “Let me go!”
“Natalia, calm down,” my mom cried. She put her hand on my head to try to make me stop.
“Let me go!” I screamed with rage.
Suddenly all hands were off of me and I was free. I jumped out of bed and screamed. I grabbed the curtains and ripped them down. I ran to the flat screen TV and punched through it then turned around and flipped the bed over with so much strength that it stuck to the wall.
I went completely crazy. Ruining his room was just the beginning. I broke through the door and walked to the balcony that connected the two halls. I jumped and clung onto the crystal chandelier as it rattled and crystals fell to the marble floor below. The chandelier came crashing down but I landed safely.
I was like a tornado. I wanted to stop ruining the beautiful house I used to go to for calmness but I was like a wild animal.
The sudden burst of energy wore off in less than five minutes and I became weak in seconds. I fell to the ground and was limp. I opened my eyes and looked around me. I was in what used to be the game room. Everything was ruined. All the arcade game’s were in pieces just as the pool table and everything else.
I suddenly broke into sobs when I realized what I’ve done. I turned to my side and vomited. I was now in a pool of my own vomit and tears.
“Natalia!” My mom cried when she ran into the room.
“Mom,” I croaked.
“I’m here, I’m here,” she whispered.
“Dad.”
“I’m right here, honey. Let me get you out of that mess.” He picked me up and carried me out of the room.
“Keith. Sarah,” I cried. I kept my eyes shut as my dad walked me up the stairs. I didn’t want to see the destruction.
“They’re safe,” my dad responded. “It’s alright, honey. It’s alright.”
I sat in the bathtub as my mom helped me wash myself because I was incapable of doing it alone. I felt so weak that I couldn’t even open my eyes though tears were still flowing out. I got into a change of clothes and my dad carried me into one of the bedrooms I forgot to destroy.
“Go to sleep, baby,” my mom whispered.
I shook my head as I cried. “I’m scared.”
“I’m right here, baby. You’ll be fine.”
I shook my head again.
My mom stroked my cheek and gasped.
I didn’t ask her what was wrong or didn’t make any emotion. I kept my eyes and mouth closed because I was too weak to move them.
“Jeremiah!” She called.
My dad came running into the room as if I was still going ballistic. “What is it?” He asked.
“Feel her forehead,” my mom said in a shaky voice.
He laid his hand on my head and gasped just as my mom did.
“She’s burning up,” she whispered.
“She’s malnourished,” Keith murmured as he walked into the room. “She needs food and sleep, the two things she refuses.”
“But I thought ghosts can’t get sick… why?” My dad cried in a desperate voice.
“Incorrect, Mr. Wellington. Ghosts can’t be harmed. We’re prone to sicknesses just like everyone else but I don‘t think she’s sick. She just might be stressed.”
My mom exploded into tears.
“Do you need me to make her something to eat?” Sarah asked in a gentle voice from somewhere in the room. At first I thought it was Maddie who was speaking with her soft voice but it was Sarah. It actually sounded like she cared.
“Not right now, Sarah,” my dad said. “It looks like she’s actually getting some rest. We shouldn’t bother her. Thank you anyways.”
“This is all because of him, right?” My mom asked while she sobbed silently, thinking I was asleep.
“It’s quite obvious,” Keith responded. “Never in my life have I seen anyone act so nasty because of a break-up.”
I cringed at the word.
“I don’t mean to interrupt but I don’t think here is a very good place to have a conversation like that considering Natalia in the room,” Sarah said.
I was shocked at her abnormal sympathy for me.
After they all shuffled out of my room I turned weakly to my side to face the window. My mom set a bucket beside my pillow just in case I would vomit again.
Why was the happening? Was it because the person I loved more than anything else had exited my life? I had a feeling that wasn’t the complete reason. I knew at the pit of my stomach that something was completely out of place. Nathan claims he left because he couldn’t endure being a ghost any longer. I didn’t believe that for one second.
Nathan was my first true love. When he came into my life he repaired me. Turned my into a new person. I went through a rebirth. I loved the person I was able to be. Now without him I was just shattered glass, broken into a million pieces than before.
Once again I didn’t spend my night sleeping. I spent it face down in my pillow, crying and thinking about the short time I had with Nathan. What was and what could’ve been.