I Know It's Hurting You, But It's Killing Me

“Are you ready to talk about it?” Dad asked as we sat in the car and he drove. Brian, Jimmy, Zacky, Johnny, and Lex all sat in both back seats passed out. We had only been on the road for an hour, which meant another hour or so to go. “Not really,” I murmured.

He sighed and slowed down as we hit some traffic. “I’ve been patient with you Audrey, but you really need to talk about it.”

“And I have! I just don’t feel like talking about it right now, I mean it’s bad enough Brandon’s not even in jail for what he did and Ryan is practically stalking me.”

“What do you mean Ryan is practically stalking you?” He demanded quietly, not wanting to wake the others. “Damn it,” I cursed myself. “He sent me a text last night around eleven thirty.”

“And you felt the need to keep this from me why, Audrey?”

“I don’t know, maybe because it doesn’t exactly matter right now. I’m always with one of you so I figure that I’m protected.” I shrugged.

“Give me your damn cell phone.” He emphasized each word through his gritted teeth, clearly pissed and annoyed. I pulled my phone out from my bag and handed it to him without saying another word. He opened it and read the text message before slipping it into his pocket.

“We will be talking about this later Audrey,” He finally said. “That doesn’t surprise me,” I muttered.

“Can’t we enjoy this week Audrey?” He asked. “I don’t know, can we dad?” I retorted.

“You know what? I give up Audrey, if you want to be a little bitch this week then go ahead but Me and the guys are going to enjoy our vacation before tour. Oh, and one more thing, I have my laptop with me and you start your classes tomorrow.” He said calmly but with you couldn’t miss the anger in his voice.

I turned back towards the window and chewed on my lip as tears stung my eyes.

--

“I’m sorry Mr. Sander’s, it seems that there has been a mistake.” The hotel worker said behind the desk as he looked at his computer screen. “What kind of mistake?” Dad asked irritated. “We have two doubled bedded rooms booked for you, but the other two were only booked as single bedded room. I’m terribly sorry for the inconvenience.”

“It’s alright,” Dad chuckled. “That will be perfectly fine for us.” The man nodded before handing my dad the room keys.

“Alright guys this is how it’s going to work, so listen up.” Dad said after we walked back over to the guys. “Brian and I in one room, Zacky and Johnny in another, and Jimmy you get your own because they made a mistake when I booked the rooms.” The guys nodded and took their keys.

“As for you two,” Dad said, turning to Lex and I. “You have to share the other room.” Dad smiled before handing Lex our keys.

“But it only has one bed!” I protested immediately. “What else am I to do Audrey? It’s too late to book another room, and I’m sure the guys don’t want to share a bed with Lex. You’ll be fine, I’m pretty sure Lex won’t harm you.”

I folded my arms across my chest and glared down at the floor not knowing what to say. “We’re all on the same floor, so I suggest you get comfortable and relax for a few hours and later we’ll get something good to eat for dinner.”

--

“I can’t fucking believe this,” I muttered as I sat my suitcase down on the floor next to the door in our hotel room. “At least we have a beautiful view.” Lex laughed as he opened the balcony doors and walked out there. The room was simple but nice and of course it would do for the week.

“Alright, we need to figure out our sleeping arrangements.”

“What’s there to figure out? You take one side of the bed and I take the other.”

“No Lex, I’m not sharing a bed with you.” I sighed and shook my head. “Well, I’m not sleeping on the floor again Audrey.”

“Okay fine, we can share the bed.” I gave in. “Cool,” He smirked. “But you have to wear shorts and a t-shirt to bed and you better keep your hands to yourself.” He nodded in agreement with my rules.

I laid down on the bed and closed my eyes. Not to got to sleep, just to rest for a few minutes. I felt the bed sink beside me and I could feel him staring at me. “Stop doing that,” I warned him, “Stop doing what?” He laughed.

I opened my eyes and climbed off the bed. “Stop staring at me and giving me that look.”
“What look are you talking about Audrey?”

“You keep giving me that look that says you want to just fuck me.” I put it bluntly, not sure how else I could say it. He chuckled, “Don’t flatter yourself,” He replied smartly. “I can’t deal with you right now, I’ll be back later.” I grabbed my room and key and left him alone.

I walked down the hallway and knocked on dad and Brian’s door. “Hey,” Dad answered as he pulled open the door. “Can I hang out with you until dinner?” I asked. “Sure, but what about Lex?” He asked as he let me walk by him and into the room.

“He’s being a jerk.” I muttered. Dad sighed and shut the door behind me. I sat down on his bed and leaned back against the headboard. I could hear the shower going which let me know that Brian was taking a shower.

“I’m sorry about earlier in the car dad. I was going to tell you about the text message, but honestly I completely forgot about it.” He sat down on the edge of the bed and took my hand in is. “It’s okay Audrey, I just worry about you. If you get anymore text messages let me know, alright?” He asked as he pulled out my cell phone from his pocket and handed it to me.
“Okay, I promise.” I nodded.

“Audrey we really need to talk about tour,” Dad said. “Okay,” I said slowly. “What?” I wondered. “You and Lex are going to have to decide were your going to sleep, because we only have one extra bunk and then the couch.”

“Let him have the bunk, I’ll take the couch.”

“Audrey, the couch is really uncomfortable.”

I shrugged. “I’m not going to listen to him complain the entire time over him sleeping on the couch. He can have it and I’ll take the couch, I’ve slept on it before. It’s not the big of a deal.”

“Lets not decide anything right now, we’ll discuss it when the time comes. I just wanted to tell you before hand that way you knew.” He stated. “Okay, thanks for the head up Dad.” I nodded.

He smiled and gave me a hug.