I Know It's Hurting You, But It's Killing Me

I stood up from the sand before walking off and leaving him alone. I didn’t even want to be at the beach in the first place, and I sure as hell didn’t want to talk to anyone. I walked back to the group and noticed the guys and Lex were out somewhere in the water. I slipped on my shorts and grabbed my flip flops and my phone.

“What are you doing Audrey?” Brian asked from behind me. “Going back to the hotel, I can’t do this right now.” I shook my head as I looked around for anything else that I might have brought.

“Oh, no you don’t.” He grabbed my arm, stopping me from leaving. “Please let go of my arm,” I said as tears fell from my eyes. He released my arm and sighed.

“Why are you so afraid to hear the truth?” He asked. I turned to him and looked him right in the eye. “You just don’t get it, nobody does.” I turned away and made my way back to the hotel.

I swiped my room key and entered the room. I paced back and forth; my mind just racing with thoughts I picked up my phone and called the one person who I knew could answer the question that stayed in my head at all times.

“Hello?” His voice answered. A shiver went up and down my spine just from hearing his voice.

“Brandon, I need to ask you something.” I got straight to the point.

“Audrey?” He questioned; his voice full of shock and surprise.

“Yeah, it’s me.”

“Why are you calling me? Up for another round or something?” He chuckled.

“I need you to answer a question for me. It’s the least that you could do, don’t you think?” I asked.

“Sure, ask away,” I could hear the irritation in his voice, but I ignored it.

“Why? Why did you have to rape me?” I kept my voice strong, but you could still easily hear the fear.

“Because I could,” He chuckled once more before the line went dead.

I looked down at my phone for a moment before I finally exploded with anger and rage. I threw my phone as hard I could against the wall and it shattered into small pieces. “I hate you!” I screamed as loud as I could, even though I was sure people on the same floor could hear me.

I looked into the mirror in the bathroom and I had no idea who was starring back at me, because it sure as hell didn’t look like me. I pushed everything off of the bathroom counter feeling even more anger run through my veins.

Before I could stop myself, I threw my fist against the mirror with all the strength I had left in my body and it also shattered; slicing my knuckles and my cheek in the process. I fell to the ground in tears and wondered how everything had gotten so screwed up in such a small amount of time and what I did to deserve it.

“Audrey,” Dad gasped as Lex opened the door and they all walked into the room. “I’m sorry, I didn‘t mean to.” I cried and covered my face with my hands. Dad rushed over to me and moved my hands from my face to see several cuts on my cheek. He picked up my hand and examined the damage on my knuckles.

“I have to take you to the hospital, okay?” He asked softly, and I nodded.

“We’ll take care of the mess, you go and take care of her.” Brian told dad. “I’m coming with you,” Jimmy stated as he stepped forward. “Okay,” Dad nodded and picked me up easily.

--

“Don’t leave me,” I whispered as dad laid me down on his bed in the hotel room.

We were at the hospital for a total of two hours. They x-rayed my hand and when they saw I hadn’t broken anything they wrapped my knuckles up, and took care of the cuts on my cheek before sending us on our way.

I was mentally and physically exhausted, and all I wanted to do was sleep, but I didn’t want to be alone. It surprised me by how tired I actually was, considering it was only three in the afternoon but I guess in the end it didn’t really matter.

“I have to talk to the guys for a few minutes, but I’ll be right out there if you need me. Go to sleep, don‘t try and fight it.” He told me. I nodded and closed my eyes before falling to sleep.

Matt’s POV

“Is she asleep?” Brian asked as I closed the bedroom door and walked over to the couch where all the guy were. “Yeah,” I nodded.

“I never thought this would get so bad,” Zacky said as he shook his head.

“I didn’t either dude, none of us did.” I responded as I sat down in the chair across from the couch and next to Brian.

“Is anyone going to tell me what’s going on?” Lex questioned from the floor. “Audrey is just going through some stuff Lex,” Brian answered before I could. He nodded and left it at that, not wanting to push the subject.

“Should we pack up and go home?” I asked them. “I don’t think we should,” Jimmy shook his head. “Ryan is still missing and it could make things worse.” He added.

“You’re right, it could make things worse.” Brian agreed with him. “Then I guess we’re staying here.” I shrugged.

“Maybe Michelle or one of the other girls should come and stay with us this week. I mean, she’ll talk to one of them.” Johnny suggested.

“I’ve got a better idea,” Brian smirked. “What?” I asked him.

“Suzy left this morning to go visit her sister up in Fresno and Papa Gates has nothing to do this week. I can call him and have him come out, Audrey listens to him pretty well.”

“That’s a brilliant idea,” Jimmy exclaimed. “It really is, it’s perfect.” I nodded.

“I’ll go give him a call,” Brian chuckled before getting up and stepping outside.