I Know It's Hurting You, But It's Killing Me

I rubbed my eyes as I sat down at the breakfast table the next morning where the guys were eating. I wasn't as tired, which I was happy about. I had slept a long time. Wesley was supposed to wake me up for dinner, but he never did so I slept straight through the night.

“You hungry?” Matt asked with a smile as he motioned to the eggs and bacon on the table.

I scrunched my nose up and shook my head as my stomach churned at the smell. “Not really,” I declined.

“You need to eat something, sweetheart.” He insisted.

I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. “I honestly don't think that's a good idea. I don't feel to well, Matt.”

He nodded before setting down a glass of orange juice in front of me along with the prenatal vitamin I had to take everyday. I frowned before picking up the large, chalky pill and putting it in my mouth. I gulped down some orange juice after it, before lying my head down on the table.

Wesley put his arm around me as he glanced down at me from my left. “You okay?” He questioned.

I shook my head, swallowing hard. “I think-- I think I'm gonna be sick.” I pulled myself out of the chair and raced around the corner to the downstairs bathroom in the hall.

I fell to my knees and vomited the orange juice I had just gulped down and whatever else was in my stomach into the clean, white toilet bowl. My long locks of hair were pulled away from my face and Matt's hand rubbed my back soothingly as I gagged a few times. There wasn't much in my stomach to begin with, so it didn't last too long. After a couple of minutes I pulled back and covered my mouth in disgust. Tears surrounded my eyes as Matt handed me a damp washcloth.

“Thanks,” I muttered before wiping my mouth.

Trembling slightly, I stood up and flushed the toilet. I turned to the small sink and rinsed my mouth with some water. Matt put his hand on my shoulder, giving it a small squeeze as I wiped my mouth with a hand towel. I turned around and took one step into Matt's arms.

“I don't want to do this anymore.” I muttered, not liking morning sickness.

Matt chuckled softly and wrapped his arms around me. “It comes with being pregnant, Audrey. You know that.”

“What if I can't do this?” I asked him softly.

Matt pulled away and raised an eyebrow at me. “That's a serious thing to say, sweetheart. I thought you decided for sure that you want to keep the baby. What happened?”

“I just...I'm scared I guess.” I said, lowering my gaze to the floor.

“Hey, look up at me.” He said, pulling my chin up with his hand until our eyes met. “Are you having second thoughts, Audrey?” He questioned.

I gulped and nodded slightly. “Somewhat, I guess. But I'll be fine.” I assured him.

“Sweetheart,” He sighed, running a hand over his face. “You have to be sure. This is a big decision. Like a life changing decision, Audrey.”

“I know!” I nodded. “But this is my only option. I can't have an abortion, I just can't. And adoption is out of the question.” I told him, tears falling freely from my eyes.

“Okay, okay.” He nodded and engulfed me into a big hug once again. “As long as you're sure.”

“I'm sure,” I confirmed, hugging him tightly.

--

“What about these shoes, honey?” Michelle asked, holding up a pair of silver flats.

“I don't know,” I shrugged. “They're cute, but I'm not sure.”

“Are you okay?” She narrowed her eyes.

“Yeah,” I lied slightly. I was feeling fine, I just had a bit of a headache and I felt a little lightheaded. Of course, I wasn't going to tell her that. “Why do you ask?” I smiled.

“You just look a bit pale is all.” She said, eying me up and down.

I laughed and waved it off. “I'm fine, Michelle. Now, about the shoes. Do you think they'll go with the dress?” I asked.

She contemplated her answer for a moment while starring at the shoes in her hands. “Maybe we should go with black.”

“That sounds like a good idea.” I nodded with a small laugh. “They'd probably match the dress better anyways.”

“Lets pay for these, and then we'll go get a bite to eat.” She grinned.

I nodded slightly and was about to answer her when everything started spinning. I went to grab a hold of her arm to keep me from falling, but it was too late. I felt myself hit the floor and then everything went black.

--

Matt's POV

“Where is she?” I questioned, running through the emergency doors and over to Michelle in a panic.

I had gotten a call about twenty minutes before that Audrey had lost consciousness in the middle of the shoe store. To say that I was freaked out would be an understatement. I probably wouldn't have been as worried if she wasn't pregnant and hadn't lost her memory recently.

“She's in the back with the doctors.” Michelle said. “She wouldn't wake up! I don't know what happened, Matt.”

I nodded and swallowed hard. “It's not your fault.” I assured her.

She sighed and sat down in one of the chairs. “The guys will be here soon.” She told me.

“Okay. I'm gonna go ask someone what's going on.” I said before walking up to the desk where several nursed were.

“May I help you sir?” A young looking blond asked with a bright smile.

“My daughter was brought in a few minutes ago from passing out.” I said.

“Name?” She questioned.

“Audrey Sander's.” I answered patiently, even though I was in a state of panic.

“Ah, the pregnant girl.” She smiled softly at me. “Follow me back and I'll take you to her.” She said as she got up from her chair.

I nodded and gave her a soft smile. We walked down a hallway before reaching a door. “The doctors in there with her.” The nurse said. “You can go on in.”

“Thank you,” I said to her before pushing open the door.

Audrey looked over at me and her face broke out in a grin. “Dad!” She exclaimed.

I walked over to her and pulled her into a large hug. “You scared the shit out of me, Audrey.”

She laughed, “I'm sorry, dad. It won't happen again, or at least I hope not.”

I breathed a sigh of relief before turning to the doctor. He looked up from the file he was holding. “Mr. Sander's I assume?” He questioned, raising an eyebrow.

“That's me, doc.” I nodded.

He extended his hand. “It's nice to meet you. I'm Dr. Fields.” He introduced himself.

“It's nice to meet you too.” I shook his hand and smiled slightly. “So, Dr. Fields, can you tell me what happened? What made her faint like that?”

“I'll explain that in time, but I think Audrey has something she'd like to talk about with you first.” He laughed and winked at Audrey, before leaving the room.

After the door closed behind Dr. Fields, I turned to Audrey with narrowed eyes. “What's going on, sweetheart?”

“I remember, Dad!” She said with excitement. “I remember everything!”

My mouth dropped slightly. I didn't expect to hear that when I walked into the room to see how she was doing and what was wrong. “That's incredible, Audrey.” I said before engulfing her into another big hug.

“I know,” She smiled and squeezed me tighter. “Maybe things are really going to be okay for now on.”

I chuckled and kissed her forehead. “Maybe,” I agreed.

“I love you, dad.” She murmured, pulling away and locking eyes with mine.

I rubbed my thumb over her cheek. “I love you too, baby girl.”