Not Your Enemy

For the first time since she had arrived in the hospital that fateful night, Tobi woke up without Jasper holding her in his arms and the tragic feeling of emptiness in the pit of her stomach. Not from hunger, not from any form of virus, but from the small sense that something wasn’t right; something important was missing for some odd reason. With a light yawn, Tobi sat up from her pillow and looked around her room as she stretched her still sleeping muscles. She noticed that she didn’t have a new set of fresh flowers at her bedside, nor did she have a small reminder of how beautiful she was that day. Puzzled, Tobi pressed the nurses button and the moment a sleepy eyed woman walked into her room, Tobi asked for the famous Dr. Cullen.

“Oh, I’m sorry but I don’t think he’s check in this morning,” the nurse said with a light smile, “it’s a little sunny outside and I bet he’s taken his family on an early trip up to the mountains. He’ll most likely be back by the end of the night.”

“Thank-you,” Tobi faked her old smile and watched the woman walk out without another word. It puzzled her as to why Jasper hadn’t found a way to sneak into the hospital as Edward had done just a couple of days before, but she figured her could have been hunting because they had kissed a lot the day before and her blood was to him as fire was to her. Even with the thoughts of positivity in her head, Tobi felt that something wasn’t right.

Something had happened.

A small knock echoed in the room and Tobi turned to look just in time to see Paul’s large body walk through the room with three large bags of food in his hands; two for him and one for Tobi, who looked as if she were wasting away in the hospital with each passing day. He had left an hour earlier when she had been sleeping because his stomach was growling angrily and he wanted to give himself time to think over the kiss they shared the night before.

It was right, so right it was almost wrong for them to share the feeling, but even after they pulled away Paul knew Tobi had been holding back because Jasper had been in her life.

Jasper was the only thing coming between the two and their happiness.

“I hope you don’t mind dinner for breakfast” Paul said as he pulled up her table from the wall and set out her food in front of her, “Emily had enough saved from last night because Jared had skipped dinner to patrol with Sam. She said she hopes you like steak mashed potatoes.”

“It’s fine,” Tobi was able to mutter lowly, but as she ate the food Paul had kindly brought for her she tasted nothing. Her eyes looked into space and her left leg was hugged tightly against her chest. The feeling wouldn’t go away, and the feeling was dark enough to make the young girl want burst into tears and collapse into Paul’s chest so he could whisper sweet nothings about her just PMSing or something.

That’s when it hit her… she could have just been pre-PMSing.

But the feeling was like something had happened to Ruby or Jasper or Hannah; it was a feeling that gnawed at Tobi’s insides like maggots on a dead carcass.

It was painful.

“Tobi,” Paul’s voice was gentle, sounding like he cared from deep inside his heart, “what’s wrong? Is your leg still hurting?”

Tobi shook her head and reached to firmly grasp Paul’s hand in hers as she smiled brokenly, “I’m perfect. I just have a feeling that something is wrong.”

Her voice was enough to break his heart, and her shaking hands just made everything worse. For the first time, ever, Paul dropped his fork and pushed his food to the side to cover Tobi’s tiny hand in his. His eyes looked deeply into hers and he shook his cropped head like a stern father, “Is it because we kissed? I know I shouldn’t have pushed you into it, I’m sorry, but I had to show you that we could be in love, more so than the love you have for that Cullen, and be together for the rest of our lives. I had to show you that we were meant to be more.”

“I love you, Paul,” Tobi said freely for the first time, meaning more than just platonically, “but I love Jasper more. After… after what happened at the party, my life has been hell at school and because of that it’s been hell for my little sister and I want to fucking hate your guts for it. But I can’t. I’m not going to lie and say that I don’t love anything about you because, in fact, I love everything about you oddly enough. But Jasper helped me get through the pain you caused… he hasn’t hurt me, and he swore he never would.”

Paul shook his head and grabbed her shoulders, “He can hurt you. For as long as your heart beats, he can hurt you.”

“And as long as you’re a wolf and can’t control your temper, so can you.”

“Never.”

Tobi shrugged and took her hands out of Paul’s grasp to cup his cheeks as if she were about to whisper words of comfort, “You’ve already done it once and for that I can’t trust my heart to you. Not now, not while I have a boy who treats me like I shit fucking diamonds.”

Paul nodded and back away from Tobi’s bedside to sit in his usual chair.

As she watched his face drop and his eyes lose emotion, Tobi shook her head and tears brimmed her red eyes, “Please, don’t look like that. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

Paul shook his head and locked eyes with Tobi’s, “No, I deserved it. I hurt you more than words can express and now I’m reaping what I sewed a long time ago.”

“That doesn’t mean I don’t love you.”

“But you can never love me with your whole heart as long as he’s around,” Paul’s voice was a bit sharp but not enough to drive Tobi away or to tears. He had understood that it was his fault his imprint would never love him, but that didn’t mean he’d fight to make sure she ended up with the best person for her and a leech wasn’t what he saw as best, “just promise that you’d give me a chance if things don’t end up on a good note.”

“Paul, I-“

“Just promise to give me one more chance.”

Tobi pulled her hand to her chest and nodded with a smile as she promised something she knew would never happen, “If Jasper and I don’t make it… you will have your chance. For what you do for me now and how you’ve been focusing on me… you deserve one.”

The two finished eating in silence, but Paul couldn’t help but grin from the warmth in his stomach. After they kissed, he knew things would start looking up. As soon as Paul had pushed the food to the side so Tobi could have enough space to lay back once more, the door opened and Ruby walked in with a lost look in her eyes and flushed cheeks.

Almost at once Tobi know something was up. She knew that the feeling in the pit of her stomach was caused because of whatever happened to Ruby. It was a small connection they had because of how tight their bonds were, and Tobi was surprised she couldn’t taste the food her friend ate because of its strength. It came in handy at times.

“Hey,” Ruby greeted them and sat down on the armchair. Her brown hair fell in her face carelessly and it looked as if she didn’t put much effort into how she dressed for school because of whatever was on her mind.

“No rude comment?” Paul asked with a cocked eyebrow, confused as to why he wasn’t verbally abused at once.

Ruby had a blank look on her face, one that scared Tobi greatly, “Can you please leave? I need to talk to my best friend.”

Paul was surprised that she said please, so he obliged and stepped out of the room.

“What’s wrong?” Tobi asked and sat up. Her voice was fully alarmed and her heart started pounding at once as she waited for her friend to explain everything.

“Last night, at Bella’s party,” Ruby began to explain, “she got a small paper cut, and Jasper attacked her.”

Tobi’s eyes widened and she thought to how bad Jasper must have felt. It made her realize how fragile humans were, how fragile she was, compared to vampires. She looked at her friend with questions sailing through her mind, “And?”

“She’s alive, but Edward pushed her aside, and along the way, me, so we both fell on a glass table. I got some cuts on my hands,” she faced her hands upward and showed Tobi the marks. “Emmett… he lost control.”

“He didn’t…?” Tobi asked unsure of what to ask.

“No, he didn’t bite me, I would’ve been turning into a vampire if he did, Tobi, but… the look in his eyes… it was scary,” she admitted to Tobi, and she would only admit it to her. “Since last night, I haven’t seen or heard from Emmett, and I’m worried. They weren’t at school, and I thought Jasper would be here or something.”

“Have you tried calling him again?” Tobi asked frustrated that she wasn’t allowed a cell phone. Her old one had burned in the fire and her lack of communication with anyone other than visitors had pissed her off greatly. She wanted to call Jasper to see if he was okay, or just to hear his voice if he wasn’t; Tobi yearned to pull him into her arms and rock his pain away.

Ruby took out her phone. “At least a hundred times.”

“Ma-maybe they just need some time,” Tobi said, her voice shook and tears clouded her gaze but she wasn’t going to cry. An old promise to herself, but one she would keep for as long as she could. Tobi knew Ruby didn’t buy it, Tobi didn’t even buy it, but it was comforting to hear the words in the air.

Jasper just couldn’t leave like that.

“You’re right.”

Paul walked back inside with his cell phone in his palm and a small smile on his face. He nodded politely, yet stiffly, to Ruby and kissed the top of Tobi’s head before telling them he had to return to La Push and talk to Sam about something. Once he was gone, Ruby had climbed into the bed with Tobi and rested her head on Tobi’s shoulder as they gazed up at the television but neither took in what was there. Jasper was on Tobi’s mind as sounds blasted from the screen and his smile wouldn’t go away.

Tobi didn’t know if she could take the pain if he had decided to-

’No, don’t think like that. He’ll be coming through your window at any moment.’

After a full day of watching everything and nothing, Ruby sat up and looked down at her friend, “TV sucks, do they have DVD’s around here?”

“Maybe in the library,” Tobi said, but she wasn’t really paying attention.

“I’ll go get us some,” she got out of the bed and got out of the bedroom.

Tobi waited for the door to shut before she reached for the three vases of bouquets next to her bed and started playing the childish game of ‘Left Me Not’ with the flower petals. Her eyes teared up as she went through the first two bouquets and just as she was about to finish up the last things got to hard for her.

“He left me,” she whispered as she desecrated the plants in her fingers, “he left me not. He left me. He left me not. He-“

Suddenly, the door bursted open and Ruby rushed in with tears in her eyes and shaking hands, “They’re gone.”

Tobi’s eyes were confused and alerted, “Who is?”

“They’re gone, Tobi, I j-just heard some nurses say that Carlisle got some job offer in LA and he quit this morning, and now they’re gone… they’re gone,” Ruby repeated to herself unable to comprehend her own words.

All air left the lungs of Tobi’s and her heart seemed to stop beating. It was excruciating and it made the tears she tried so hard to keep in fall freely down her cheeks. She shook her head and ignored the biting pain in her chest, “No… no, that… can’t be right,” Tobi chuckled nervously. “You must’ve heard wrong, Ruby.”

“No, I didn’t, I tried calling all of them, Tobi, all of their phones are disconnected. I even tried Bella, but… something happened with her, she was missing, but when I called someone had found her… I think she knows what’s going on.”

“Why would they leave?” Tobi whispered. Her chest ached and she felt everything around her go hazy.

“Because we’re human.”

Jasper stood in the forest just a couple of feet away from the hospital with his hands in his pocket and his head down in shame. He had been standing there all day, trying to muster enough strength to give Tobi a final goodbye and a thank-you for walking into his life but he couldn’t do it. He couldn’t look her in the eyes and watch the pain, feel the pain that he knew would break both their hearts, but his decision was for the best.

It was to keep her happy and safe and out of any danger.

When Ruby had given Tobi the news, Jasper could feel the pain from where he was standing and he tore him to pieces inside to feel how badly he hurt his love, to feel how dark her emotions could get. His hand shot to his chest and he held it tightly there as his forever dead heart gave phantoms pounds of heartache and misery.

“Why would they leave?” Tobi’s voice was able to speak.

“Because we’re human,” Ruby answered, her voice both lost and aloof.

Jasper shook his head and turned to runaway, but before he left he whispered his final words in Forks, “No, because I love you.”

It had been four hours since Tobi had gotten the news of Jasper leaving and she had oddly become numb to the fact that she wasn’t ever going to see him again. Her heart didn’t hurt anymore, but it was painful to breath. Her head didn’t spin as fast, but it was excruciating to move. But, most importantly, her stomach didn’t twist and turn like she was on a roller coaster…

It was as if Tobi had blocked out the pain of heartache almost fully.

Rather roughly, she grabbed the final flower, a rose redder than blood –ironic in her eyes- and grabbed the whole blossom in her fist while throwing it to the floor and glaring bitterly at its existence.

“He left me.”