Oh Baby, I Deserve Better.

I was in the hospital for about two days before I got to go home. It was weird going in with a baby in my tummy and leaving empty handed. Alex's mom and dad had taken care of Josey my entire hospital stay seeing as how Alex wanted to stay there with me. I was extremely grateful to them for being so good with her all the time.

"Do you want to stop by my parents and get Josey or do you just want to go straight home and I can pick her up later?" Alex quietly asked as he helped me into the car. I was a little sore from surgery and tears were clouding my vision, I hadn't stopped ctying since we lost it.

"We can go pick her up, I miss her" I said as a couple tears leaked down my cheeks.

"Don't cry, babe. Everything is okay now" Alex comforted as he gently kissed my forehead and then closed the door, walking around to the drivers side and getting in.

The ride to his parents house was quiet until he finally pulled into the driveway.

"Just stay in the car and I'll go get her, okay babe?" Alex softly asked. I just nodded and looked out the window at the wind blowing through the trees. I didn't know it was possible to go from feeling so happy to feeling like you want to die in such a short amount of time.

"Mommy!!" Josey yelled as she jumped into the backseat and Alex strapped her into her carseat.

"Hi baby" I tried to muster up as much enthusiasim as I could to greet her but my happiness just sounded so forced it wasn't even worth the try.

"Where have you been Momma?! I missed yous soo much!!" She giggled in her cute little baby voice.

I was about to respond when Alex cut me off.

"Josey, Momma's been sick. Just sit back and we can talk when we get home." Josey was quiet after that and I just turned to look out the window, tears silently falling down my face.