Adventurer's Log

“You piece of shit elf! You piece of shit dwarf! You’re both pieces of shit!” Shouted the struggling cutpurse from beneath the willow, his face swollen red with hate. “I’ll make you two squeal like a pig, you hear me!? Like a pig!” Sweat was now pouring from his forehead and down his neck, his swollen face glistening in the light of the hot sun above.

The gnats were beginning to buzz around his head, lapping up the sweat which continued to trickle all the way down to his tunic. His hands were bound together with thick rope, and his hands bled from the struggle, and were burned and itching from the thick rope digging into his skin. In spite of this, he continued to wiggle and writhe, desperate to free himself from the rope which not only restrained his hands, but his feet as well, all the while flinging curses, insults, and threats at his captors sitting in front of a campfire.

“Would ye’ shut up already!? By the gods, yer’ louder than me muther-in-law!” Shouted a dwarf. Unfortunately, the dwarf was drowned out by the sound of the purloiner’s endless barrage of insults.

“Your mother is a whore! You hear me, a whore!?” He shouted, thrashing from side-to-side like a fish out of water.

“He’s not going to talk Brimstone.” Said the Dark Elf sitting across from the dwarf.

“Well, what would ye’ suggest then Thorn?” Asked the dwarf, cocking his head to face the elf.

“Well…”

“You slut! I’m REALLY going to enjoy making YOU squeal, you little whore!”

“That’s it. I’ve heard enough.” Thorn sighed bitterly, reaching for the satchel sitting next to her.

“Aye, I can’t hear me self think!” Said Brimstone, covering his ears with his thick, muscular hands.

“Don’t worry you ole’ fart, I got just the spell.” Smiled Thorn rummaging through her satchel. She was soon holding a small, crystal phial containing an odd, green concoction within. She popped the cork off the phial and poured some of the strange liquid onto the palm of her hand. She set the bottle down and rubbed the liquid into both of her hands until her hands began to emit an eerie glow.

“An’ wot’s that supposed ta’ do, aye?” Asked Brimstone, hands still covering his ears.

“Just watch.” Replied Thorn, a mischievous smirk playing across her face. Thorn got up and quickly dusted off her leather trousers before pointing at the screaming bandit before her with a finger which glowed an eerie color, a color similar to the liquid used for the spell.

“You think you can make me talk with a spell!? Well you can just forget it you piece of shit! I’m not talking, and there ain’t nothing you and that hairy bastard can do about it! So, you can just rot in-“ Suddenly, the thief was interrupted in mid-sentence. His lips continued to move, but no words came out, not a single one. The thief, absolutely awe-struck by this revelation, closed his mouth, tasting a bead of sweat which dripped down from his forehead.

“There, maybe now we can have some peace.” Said Thorn sitting back down. “Hey, Brimstone, mind tossing me that rag? I’m starting to heat up here.”

“Wot was that Thorn?” Asked Brimstone as he lowered his hands away from his ears.

“It’s a mute spell. As long as that spell remains, try as he might, he can’t utter a sound. Rag?” Answered Thorn, extending a hand.

“Uh, sure thing, lass.” Brimstone grabbed a damp rag and wiped away the sweat accumulating on his bald head before handing it to Thorn. “I dun’ care wot it was, as long as it keeps his pie hole shut.” He then swatted away a mosquito which bit his slightly exposed neck.

Thorn wiped away the sweat which dampened her face and neck. “I don’t know about you friend, but I can’t wait to get out of this swamp.”

“Aye, me too. But we ‘ave a job ta’ do.”

“I know, I know.” Sighed Thorn, putting the rag down.

“An’ ye’ haven’t forgotten ta’ code, have ye’?” Asked Brimstone, patting his knees.

Thorn sighed yet again, “No…”

“When there’s a person in need…”

“Do a good deed.” Finished Thorn with a sigh. “That is, if he can pay, of course.” Another smirk played itself across her face as she wagged her index finger.

“O’ but of course! We’re adventurer’s lass, not saints!” Said Brimstone, swatting another mosquito. “We gotta’ fill our bellies like everyone else in this world.”

“But couldn’t we have skipped out on THIS one?” Asked Thorn, leaning forward over the campfire. “They’re paying us a hefty sum, sure, but I’m beginning to think this is FAR more trouble than what it’s worth.”

“An’ wot makes ye’ say that? “ Asked Brimstone, reaching over behind him.

“It’s hot as hell, the bugs-“ She paused, eying a big, hideous mosquito on her shoulder. She slowly raised her hand, waited, and then sent it flying towards her shoulder, smashing the mosquito into a smear of ick. “-Are biting…” She continued, observing the mess on her hand. “And finally, he’s NOT talking!” She then wiped the mess across her trousers, all the while glancing at their captive.

The bandit was still trying as desperately as ever to free himself from his binds. But, he was indeed quieter about it, to the relief of the two adventurers.

“Ere’ give him this.” Said Brimstone turning back around with a leather canteen gripped firmly in his hand.

“Water?” Inquired Thorn as she accepted the canteen. “Aye, he’s the key ta’ findin’ ta’ whereabouts of that band of thieves the town hired us to dispose of.” Said Brimstone. “Rag.” Thorn quikly grabbed the damp rag sitting next to her and gave it to Brimstone. “It won’t do us any good if’n the heat gets ta’ him.” Thorn rose from her seat and made her way to their captive, swatting away yet another mosquito.

“An’ while ye’ be doin’ that, I’ll get ta’ food ready.”

“What food?” Asked Thorn kneeling before the struggling thief.

“Wot” is a good question lass. I guess it be whatever I can catch, huh?” Brimstone guffawed as he rose up from his seat, reaching for the Blunderbuss laying on the ground right next to him.

“As long as it isn’t boar again, I’ll eat anything.” Said Thorn unscrewing the top to the canteen.

“Ah, whatever, jes’ tend the fire while I’m out, got it?”

“I know, I’m not a little elf anymore Brimstone.” Smirked Thorn.

Brimstone was silent.

“I know lass…I know.” He then trampled across a cluster of bushes and waded across a nearby stream, the water sloshing all across his stout frame as he held his blunderbuss in the air. And soon, as Thorn turned her head to see if Brimstone was there…He was gone.