Haunted

Wednesday, February 5th.

My alarm started to blare from my bedside table, and I grumbled to myself as I reached a hand out to smack it onto the floor. I laid there on my stomach, trying to desperately fall back to sleep.

"BRIAN! Get out of bed right now or you're going to be late for school!" I heard Suzy say as she walked down toward my room. I grumbled again and pulled a pillow over my head, trying to drown out any noise.

I heard Suzy knock on my door, before opening it. "Brian, I'm serious. Get out of bed..." she said, and I could tell she was still standing in my doorway.

I sighed and pulled the pillow off my head, rolling onto my back. "Alright, alright... I'm up," I mumbled as I sat up and rubbed my eyes. She left and walked back down the hall, and I proceeded to get up and get ready for school.

I arrived at school just barely on time, and I could tell as soon as I got there that something had changed.

After going through the first half of the day, I arrived at the quads and gathered with my friends for lunch. It finally clicked in my head what was different, and I smirked to myself.

"Hey, have any of you seen Sadie at all today?" I asked, still smirking.

"No, why do you care?" Zacky said as he laughed.

"No reason, its just I haven't seen her today either," I said nonchalantly.

"I bet she was too embarrassed to show her face here after yesterday," Jimmy laughed.

"Hahaha yeah. That was so good yesterday. I still can't believe I actually fucked the dyke," I laughed.

"I thought you said she was a good fuck?.." Matt asked skeptically.

"She is... but that stunt could have put a bruise on my reputation," I said with a cocky smile.

Thursday, February 6th.

I had no clue that this day at school would be one to change my life. I was at lunch with the guys, goofing off and doing whatever I pleased.

"So, are you doing anything tonight?" I asked Jacqui, one of the biggest sluts of the school. She bit her lip as she practically clung to my arm.

She leaned up to my ear. "My parents are out of town tonight.... maybe we could --"

"Yo, Brian. I think you should see this..." Matt said as he jogged over to me from one of the school buildings. He had something in his hand.

"It can wait," I replied smoothly, and put my attention back on Jacqui. I heard Matt sigh before he held up the front page of a newspaper in front of my face. I caught a glimpse of the picture on it and saw it was of a house. I rolled my eyes and pushed the paper to the side, glaring at Matt. "Dude, can't you see I'm kind of busy?" I asked.

"Read it," Matt said as he set the paper down on my lap. I sighed in aggravation and picked up the paper just so he'd leave me alone.

I furrowed my eyebrows as I read the headline.

"Local Teen Suicide"

I looked down at the picture of the house, and saw that it was vaguely familiar. It was blocked off with caution tape, but I could still tell whose house it was. It was Sadie's. I continued to read the article, not knowing what I might find...

'Local teen Sadie Johnson, age 17, was found dead in her home yesterday afternoon, suffering from a fatal, self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head. She was found by her mother, Patricia Johnson, after she returned home from work.

"When I left for work in the morning, Sadie complained she wasn't feeling well, so I told her she could stay home from school. I had no idea she was planning to kill herself," stated Mrs. Johnson. When questioned about why her daughter might have committed suicide, Mrs. Johnson did not have much to say.

'Sadie didn't show any signs of this kind of emotional discontent. She seemed to be just find the other night while she was working on a school project with a fellow classmate."'

I stopped reading and swallowed hard. She couldn't have killed herself because of me... could she?

"Wh-Why did you feel the need to show me that?" I asked Matt, trying to play it cool.

"Dunno... to see if you felt... guilty or anything," Matt said, shrugging his shoulders. He always was the one in the group who actually seemed to have a heart. Probably cuz he's around Val way too much for his own good.

"Well, I don't," I said, trying to sound like I really didn't care.

But for the first time in my life, I actually felt bad about my actions and the effects they had on others. I'd always used other people as my pawns; playing sick jokes. But this time, I actually took it too far...

I couldn't get my mind off Sadie for the rest of the day. I couldn't pay attention in class, I wasn't trying to get with other girls. I just couldn't get rid of the guilt. There was no way around it. I was the reason Sadie Johnson killed herself.

That night I was trying to do anything to get Sadie off my mind, and I had gone so far as to resort to actually doing my homework. Strange, I know. It wasn't really doing much to help me, but at least I was keeping myself busy.

I was right in the middle of some excruciating math problem, when I heard a tapping noise on my window. I ignored it, figuring it was just the rain hitting against the window. But it kept going, making a more defined pattern than the rain. I quickly glanced up at the window, seeing the water falling down the glass in unplanned trails. But I also saw something else. I couldn't tell what exactly it was because as soon as I saw it, it had vanished. But for some reason, the first thing that came to mind was a person looking in on me.

Don't be absurd Brian. You're on the second floor. No one would be at your window, in the pouring rain no less.

But still, I let my curiosity get the best of me and I got up, slowly walking towards the window. I put my face right up to the glass, looking past my reflection and into the backyard. I could barely make out the silhouette of a person, staring up at me from next to the only tree in the yard.

I squinted, trying to make out a face, but the moment I blinked, the person was gone.

Don't let your imagination get the best of you Brian. There's nothing there...

I sighed to myself, walked away from the window, and sat back on my bed, trying to concentrate again on my work.

Friday, February 7th.

That whole thing with Sadie and her death was really starting to get to me, and it had only just been the day before that I found out. I put up a front when I was around my friends and as far as I knew, they all thought everything was okay. I really was trying to get all thoughts of her from my mind, but one thing always came back to me.

It was your fault...

I didn't want to admit it.

It was your fault...

I was loaded down with guilt.

It was your fault...

Shut up head, I'm trying to concentrate...

"Yo, earth to Brian." I heard, and my attention snapped back to where it should be. Zacky was waving his hand in front of my face, and I swatted it away.

"What?" I asked cluelessly.

"I asked you if you were ready for the show at the bar tonight." he said.

"Oh... yeah..." I said as my gaze floated over all the people walking around the quads. I found myself looking where Sadie used to sit all by herself. "...Sure..." I finished off, furrowing my eyebrows as people moved out of my line of sight. It was Sadie. She was sitting there, plain as day. But... her eyes looked sullen and sunken in and she was staring straight at me, her hands folded neatly in her lap.

What the fuck...

I tilted my head to the side as I looked back at her.

"Dude, what the fuck are you staring at?" Jimmy asked.

"Look over there at that person staring right at me. It's Sadie," I said, probably sounding like a complete moron to the guys. I saw them turn their heads and look towards where she sat, ever watchful of me. She didn't blink; she kept a blank face. Why was she looking at me?

"Dude, there's nothing there. Are you high or something?" Jimmy said as they looked back at me.

I tore my gaze from Sadie and looked at him. "No. She's right there..." I said and turned to look at her again. She was gone. I blinked a few times and shook my head in confusion.

"There was no one there, man. And even if there was, it couldn't have been Sadie. She's dead," Matt said.

It's your fault...

Shut up, head. Stay out of this. You're not helping.

"You okay dude? You're like... spacing out again..." Matt asked curiously.

"Yeah... I -- I'm fine," I said, and I looked down at the table.

The show had started. The bar was packed. Kids from school and other locals were all there, pushing to get as close to the 'stage' as they could. My mind was clear, for the first time that day. Playing my guitar helped keep my mind focused on the task at hand.

I pulled my eyes up from my guitar and looked at the crowd, smiling at all the people jumping, moshing, doing whatever. I shifted my sight back to my guitar for a split second before looking back up into the crowd. The smile slowly left my face.

There she was, standing right in front of me in the crowd, watching me, not moving a muscle. I gulped hard, hoping that I didn't just play a sour note.

This was getting out of hand. Matt was right. Sadie was dead. She couldn't have been standing there before me. But she was. She was there.

She's creeping me out...

It's your fault...

I wish she'd stop staring at me.

It's your fault...

Didn't I tell you before to shut up? Oh God, I'm talking to the voice inside my head. I'm going crazy.

You're going crazy because it's your fault...

I tried to focus back on my music, keeping my eyes locked on my guitar and nothing else. I just wanted to get out of there and go to sleep. Or get trashed and rid myself of these crazy things I was seeing.

I dared to take another glance into the crowd, and felt relief wash over me when I saw Sadie was now gone.

The weekend came, but it wasn't a relief anymore. The guilt was eating away at me from the inside out; I was steadily going insane. I saw her all the time, no matter where I was. I'd be walking down the street, and she'd follow me. I'd be in my house, she'd stand in the doorway. It was really starting to get out of hand.

I was the only one who could see her. She was... haunting me... I couldn't get away from her. The only time I was free of her was when I was asleep. I just wanted to sleep through the weekend, and hope that when I woke up I would be ridden of this plague.

By Sunday, I decided I'd had enough for a couple days, so I laid down to sleep before it was even dark outside.

I closed my eyes, laying in silence, willing sleep to wash over my brain. But it never came. After laying there for almost an hour, I felt like I was just about asleep. But something snapped my senses back to life. I didn't dare open my eyes when I felt the end of my bed shift under the weight of another person. I felt the weight settle up by where my head was, and it stopped, but stayed right there in that spot.

I felt the weight shift again, just once more, and it seemed to settle on both sides of me.

I slowly willed myself to open my eyes, but couldn't decide if I wanted to scream like a girl or throw up. She was sitting above me, one leg on each side of me, and I could clearly see where she put the gun to her head and blew her brains out.

"Stop following me," I said with a shaky voice once I was able to talk again.

She blinked once, and all of a sudden I could feel her hands around my throat, tightening their grip.

"How do you like it Brian? How do you like it when someone fucks with your head?" she spat, her voice ringing as clear as ever.

I gagged, trying to talk. "I -- don't..." I choked out through her grip.

"You don't? You don't!? Do you think people like it when you fuck with their heads?" she screamed. I shook my head no as best I could.

"That's what I thought. So take this into consideration little boy... Don't fuck with other people. Its not very nice Brian. Not very nice at all. We don't like getting fucked over Brian," she said and squeezed my throat as tight as possible. "We don't like it at all..." she said through gritted teeth.

I could feel myself becoming light-headed rather quickly. And then my eyes rolled into the back of my head, and I was out.

My alarm started to blare from my bedside table, and I grumbled to myself as I reached a hand out to smack it onto the floor. I laid there on my stomach, trying to desperately fall back to sleep.

"Brian! Get out of bed right now or you're going to be late for school!" I heard Suzy say as she walked down toward my room. I grumbled again and pulled a pillow over my head, trying to drown out any noise.

I heard Suzy knock on my door, before opening it. "Brian, I'm serious. Get out of bed..." she said, and I could tell she was still standing in my doorway.

This routine seemed all too familiar...

I sighed and pulled the pillow off my head, rolling onto my back. "Alright, alright... I'm up... I hate Mondays..." I grumbled as I sat up and rubbed my eyes.

"Monday? Brian, its Wednesday. Now get up," she said before leaving the room.

I suddenly became wide awake. Wednesday.

I jumped from my bed and ran into the bathroom, looking in the mirror. I scanned my neck. After last night, there should definitely be marks. But there were none.

Okay, what the fuck is going on?

.......

...The voice is no longer talking... I take that as a good sign.

I dashed around to get ready and made my way to school, where I met up with the guys. If today was Wednesday... then....

"Hey guys.... what happened yesterday?" I asked.

"How could you not remember dude? You pretty much told the entire male population of the school how fucking good Sadie Johnson is in bed." Zacky said as he and the guys started laughing.

Then... that was all a dream?

"Hey have any of you guys seen her today?" I asked desperately.

"Actually yeah. She walking into the school like five minutes ago..." Matt said.

I had to fight the smile that wanted to jump to my lips. She didn't kill herself. Everything's okay.

"Alright. I'll uh... catch up with you later..." I said, and made a mad dash into the school. I ran down the halls and stopped near her locker. She was there. And I smiled. This was my chance to make things right...

I stopped next to her. "Oh man, you don't know how glad I am to see you," I said, catching her off guard.

She turned her head and looked at me funny. "Why, so you can talk shit about the other night again?" she spat, and the smile left my face immediately.

"Uh no... listen... Sadie. I just want to apologize for what I did yesterday and what I said to people," I said, being as sincere as I had ever been in my life.

"Sure you do," she said sarcastically.

"No really. I am. I was doing a lot of thinking lately... ergh... last night I mean... and I was way out of line. If there's anything I can do to make it up to you, I'll do it," I said.

She sighed and looked like she was contemplating it in her head.

A sly smile crept to her face. "Get us an A on that English project, and I'll accept your apology," she said lightly.

"Alright... I will. I'll uh, see you later," I said and walked back to find my friends.

"Dude.. what was that all about?" Zacky asked, since he'd seen be with Sadie just then.

"Nothing," I smiled. "Nothing at all."