I Have A Secret, This Is My Confession

It was never supposed to turn out like this. We were supposed to just be friends. That is what you said, right? Well, I suppose that changed when I fell asleep on your shoulder. Or maybe I’m wrong. I don’t know. You really confuse me. One second you want me to be your everything, the next you barely want to be friends. Did I do something wrong? Or was it just my past getting to you? I’m not the same person I used to be and I wish I could make you see that.

You don’t want me to change for you, but it’s too late. I already am. I can’t help it. Just like I couldn’t help myself when you needed help, when you needed someone to be there for you.

If you didn’t want me, why did you do and say the things you did to just change your mind the next day? All I know is that I want you. More than I should.

I’m too scared of the confrontation to tell you this, but I’m falling for you. I can feel myself falling in love with you and that thought alone scares the fuck out of me. Especially when I don’t think you will ever or could ever love me back.

Finding the person I could spend the rest of my life with and not being the right person for them. That would kill me. I don’t think I could handle loving someone with everything I had, to get turned away like it didn’t mean anything or that I wasn’t important.

You just might be that person for me and I don’t know how to deal with it.