The Girl That You Want

If you ever were concerned:
I spent a lot of time writing this. I didn't know what to say, if I had to say anything at all.
You were so perfect. Poised like a ballerina, you danced straight into my life. I could never see a flicker of flaw in your eyes. You conveniently distracted me with the way you cradled your guitar-like a child- the way you so delicately wrapped your fingers around the metallic strings. I thought you were different. I loved you, Daniel.
I've come to know the truth. That breathing was repeating rhythmic pulses of life. I could barley breathe. My soul was tangled around your snake like veins, they constricted me, you constricted me. Releasing my last breath, you defeated me. Crushed, crumbled, our eyes closed. Torn apart and tattered, I whispered, "I loved you." Then I realized that loving, too, was repeating rhythmic pulses of life.
I have breathed into you, and you said you loved me. You told me you loved me, Daniel. Don't you remember? You said it everyday, roboticly. But I thought it meant something then. But you never loved me, you loved that you could change me. You loved how you could mold me like clay. You loved that you could roll me up like a small, cool marble and tuck me into your pocket when you didn't want me anymore.
I was nothing but an accessory to you, a highlight to your perfect outfit, the look you wanted the world to see. You never wanted me for who I was.
I don't know how you fooled me. Was it the way you wrapped your fingers gently around your guitar strings? Was it the way you played me like a song, the way you played the world like one of your songs? I'm not sure, but I was seeing you at last. The man I had thought I knew was gone. It was like wiping the dirt off the window, and now I was finally seeing you clearly, for what you are. Lie, Cheat. The words I can use to describe you are endless, but what does that make me for falling for you?
I remember who I used to be, before I met you. I was happy, lively, hoping dreaming, social. But you made me some shapeless form. I became some used up withered Silly-Puddy. It's going to take a long time before i know what or who I am again.
If you care, you didn't hurt me. You destroyed me. You took me apart piece by piece. You stole away my friends, my family. I spent so many nights lying awake in bed, think run, run for the hills! But I thought in some weird way that you loved me, and I didn't want to hurt you. So I stayed.
I remember your scent, your intoxicating scent. Like some sort of wild plant was growing beneath your skin. I hate the smell of anything outdoors now, It makes me sick. Physically and emotionally.
Do you remember when we first met? You were on stage singing another girls name in some song. In that moment I imagined it was my name, and I fell in love with that idea. When we met after the show, we laughed together. We talked together, and before I left that night you told me not to change, ever. You told me I was one of the beautiful people, the real beautiful people.
From that moment on, you had me. I was yours to wear and tear. But all you did was tear me. Now I hope you are broken. I hope you are cold, alone and broken, like a beer bottle in a dark alleyway. Most of all I hope that I am the one that broke you. The way you did the same exact thing to me.
I do not know what kind of girl you want or what kind of girl you wanted, but I am pretty sure that girl doesn't exist. At least not for you. The girl that you wanted wasn't me, and you tried to change me. The girl that you want tore us apart.
I would change for you, Daniel, I really would. But I do not have the strength to be the girl that you want. So at last, before you completely break me, I am leaving you Daniel. I'm leaving you to be alone. or find the girl that you want, because if I've come to realize anything from all this your not the guy that I want.
I loved you, Daniel, at one point, but not anymore.
Sincerely,
Elizabeth.
P.S. I left the ring on the table.