Remember.

I look at his mom, tears rolling down her face as she tries to sustain a sob inside, but I can tell she's going to break in a matter of seconds; her boy was in that black coffin about to be buried six feet beneath the ground.

I stare at the black coffin feeling my heart go heavy, and my eyes begin to sting from the tears forming, threatening to escape any second. I blink allowing the tears to fall down my face freely, and I begin to wonder how many people actually knew about me and him; about Luke and I.

I close my eyes tight shut causing a sob filled with pain and hurt escape from me. It hurts to know he's dead, and to know he won’t ever smile again. Maybe if people had known we were in love they wouldn't have bullied him to death. Maybe, maybe we would be laughing and holding hands on the Ferris wheel.

I bring my hand to my eyes and wipe the tears away, but they keep coming out.

"Here," somebody says in a low voice handing me a soft tissue.

I take it with a small nod and wipe my eyes, but it's no use at all, the tears just keep forming and run down my eyes as if they were little kids locked inside the house and they were finally being able to run outside and play.

I let a second sob escape as I look up into the darkening sky; it seems as if it were mimicking my emotions. I close my eyes one more time seeing Luke's smiling face.

I remember the first day he ever said a word to me; I was standing at the front of the county fair entrance waiting for Jimmy, a gorgeous blond haired, blue eyed guy from school.

I started to walk away feeling my eyes fill with tears, of course Jimmy, the class clown, sophomore class president, and football star had stood me up. It was probably a tradition for the newbie’s. I had made the cheer-leading team the week before, and I guess word got around and before I knew I had accepted Jimmy's invitation to the fair.

"He probably forgot." I heard a voice coming from behind me.

I turned around and saw him, Luke. "Probably," I murmured with a small sad smile.

"Besides he's a jerk." He told me with a smile on his face.

“What makes you think that?”

“Well, he’s missing out on your company.”

I couldn't help but to smile back at him.

"Why aren't you going inside?" I asked.

He shrugged and look towards the lights, and then back at me. "Why aren't you?" he retorted.

“I asked first.” I challenged with a grin.

“Good point, well I was inside but…” He hesitated to continue.

“But what?” I questioned.

“People from school don’t believe freaks like me should be allowed to have some fun once in a while.”

“What kind of people would do that?”

“Who do you think? The perky cheer leaders, the macho jocks, and of course the slutty girls whom somehow always manage to get elected for class secretary or treasurer.” He says with anger in his voice.

“Not all of them are like that.” I say trying to defend myself.

“For me they are, high school is about popularity, if one of the royals doesn’t like you, then you’re an outcast, and that’s exactly what I am, and will be for the rest of high school.”

I try to think of what to say next, but the only thing I could come up with was to tell him I was a cheer leader and I wasn’t like the rest, but I had a feeling he wouldn’t want to talk to me if I did, and for some odd weird reason I wanted him to talk to me.

“I’m Amanda, by the way.” I ended up telling him.

“Luke,” he replied, and we stayed silent for a couple of minutes.

“If you want we can go in together, that way we won’t feel alone.” He said with a smile on his face, breaking the silence.

“I would like that, and if you want we can go on the Ferris wheel together.” I replied with a smile to match his.

“I would like that very much.”

We walked towards the entrance side by side in comfortable silence, he paid for my entrance, even though I begged him not to, but all he had said was “A lady never pays when she’s with a gentleman.” All I could do was smile and thank him for being a gentleman.

We made our way to the ticket stand and bought just enough tickets to be able to go on the Ferris wheel, the line hadn’t been long as seeing it was the second week the fair had been here, and people only came during the first and last week of the fair. Luke handed the tickets to the person working there and we sat on a red little basket with Mickey Mouse printed on its sides. I looked at Luke smiling.

“Thank you.” I whispered as we slowly began to go up.

“For what?” He asked as he turned to look at me.

“For making this night fun, and not miserable.”

“I couldn’t allow myself to let such a beautiful girl cry, because of some jerk.” He told me and looked towards the night sky.

My cheeks had gone completely red, but it didn’t matter because he couldn’t see me, and I really didn’t care if he could.

He had said something about the stars, how the lights of the town always drowned their beauty and they could never quite shine like they deserved to. He had said his dad always took him camping during summer vacation and he would tell him about the constellation, and then one summer while driving back home a truck had hit them causing his dad to slid off the road, and hit a tree.

“I survived, and he didn’t” He had whispered, and I could hear his voice breaking as if it was the first time he had ever said those words aloud.

I remember seeing a tear roll down his right cheek; I wiped it away causing him to turn to look at me. “I’m sorry,” he whispered and I shook my head, letting him know there was nothing to be sorry about.

Moments later the ride had ended, and we got off this time hand in hand, almost as If the Ferris wheel had connected us to one another.

“There you are my little cheer leader.” I remember Jimmy saying as Luke and I walked towards the exit.

My heart had dropped, and my breath hitched as if I had seen a ghost. I remember feeling Luke let go of my hand, almost in disgust, like my hand was some kind of poison.

“I thought you weren’t coming.” I spoke in a low voice.

“I could never leave my princess alone,” he spoke, and then his eyes landed on Luke, “especially not alone with Luke the puke.” Jimmy hissed as he glared at him.

“How original, Jimmy the sissy.” Luke shot back and began to walk away.

“And sorry princess for disturbing you with my presence.” He told me with a growl and walked out of the fair. I wanted to run after him and tell him it wasn’t like it seemed, but Jimmy had taken hold of my hand, and had began to drag me towards the haunted house.

“Luke!” I called out after cheer leading practice a month after the whole fair incident, I had thought he would just walk away, pretending he didn’t hear me just like the other times but this time he didn’t. Maybe it was because it was just him and I.

“What?” He questioned sounding a bit annoyed.

“Why have you been ignoring me?”

“You can’t guess?”

“Just because I’m a cheer leader, doesn’t mean I’m popular Luke.”

“Yes it does, and you’re going out with ass face Jimmy.”

“What does that matter?”

“Just forget about ever talking to me, okay?” He told me and walked away.

The only problem was that I couldn’t forget, as hard as I tried he always popped in my head. I always pictured his dark brown hair, pale skin completion and those beautiful gray eyes of his. I would sneak glances at him during Biology, and sometimes he would too. And every time I caught him looking at me I would smile at him, and he would smile back like if it was a little game of ours. We began communicating with no words, only face expressions and that was all we needed to make one another happy for the day.

Summer passed, fall came and soon left, winter come in to replace it, and before I knew it spring had come and gone, and summer came back around. That meant only one thing; the fair was back.

I met Luke by the Ferris wheel hoping he would show up, and he did. We got into a green basket this time; it didn’t really matter as long as we got to be next to each other.

“We meet again.” Luke said in a French accent.

“I missed your voice.” I whispered taking his hand in mine.

“You heard my voice every day in Biology.”

“It’s not the same thing, I missed talking to you.”

“We only talked that one day.” He reminded me.

“I still missed it.”

He smiled and squeezed my hand a bit.

“I loved your poem, the one about the shooting star.”

“It’s about you.”

I smiled and, rested my head against his shoulder.

“Do you know why the tomato blushed?”

“Because he saw the salad dressing.” Luke answered, and we laughed together.

Luke intertwined his fingers with mine, “Tell me something you have never told to anyone.” He whispered in my ear.

“Sometimes I sneak out of my house and walk to the park, and I get on the swing and I just swing there for an hour thinking.”

“Thinking about what?”

“Everything.”

“Like what?”

“Like you.”

“I think about you too, and I always wonder why you’re so unhappy.”

“How do you know?”

“I can see it in your eyes, and your smile.”

“I can see you’re unhappy by the way you doodle in your notebook.”

“We’re just two unhappy people who make each other happy every time we see each other.”

He was right. I was unhappy and he would always make me forget, because he made me feel happy, special, and unique just by a single glance.

Junior year began that year in September, Jimmy and I had broken up it was only a matter of time until he decided he needed a new cheer leader at his arm, I could care less. As the year progressed my popularity grew. I was always nominated for the dances, though I never really won, it was always Katie, it was only right that the head cheer leader was queen.

As my rank in high school grew, so did my time with Luke, we managed to get classes together, and we would ‘accidently’ seat next to each other, in order to write notes to each other. People didn’t really notice; all they cared for was gossip and the latest trends.

Luke started meeting me at the park at night, and we would talk endlessly about the things that were bothering us, talk about the things we would only write in our diaries. Talk about things we held inside that caused us pain and things that amused us. Some nights we would swing in complete silence looking up at the stars, and then Luke would walk me home.

On one of those nights I pressed my lips against his, and I felt his body tense up, and quickly loosen up, and he began to kiss me back. He had placed one of his hands gently behind my back and the other on my waist and I had wrapped my arms around his neck bringing him closer to me. In that moment I knew I was in love.

Junior year turned into senior year, Luke and I still met in secret, we would sneak classes when nobody was around, and we would exchange glances as we passed each other on the halls. The winter dance came and I was once again nominated for snow queen, though I wasn’t really expecting anything. I promised Luke I would meet him after the dance, except I was crowned snow queen and all the attention was on me. Everybody wanted to hang out and take picture with me; I was the new number one, after all Katie had gotten knocked up, if high school was a beauty pageant and Katie was the beauty queen and I was the runner up, then that meant I had now become the beauty queen of Nelson high school.

Being the new queen only meant more parties to attend to, more practices, and more time dedicated to being popular. My role had always been to smile and nod at anything Katie said, but now it was me who was talking, it was me who was making up the cheer leading routines, it was me who no longer had any time for myself.

“I can’t do this anymore Amanda.” Luke told me the night before he-before he was murdered.

“What do you mean?”

“Us, I can’t do us anymore. You’re not meant to be with someone like me.”

“But I want to be with someone like you Luke.”

“If you’re with someone like me, then you won’t be Prom Queen, you’ll be rejected and thrown out of the squad.”

“I don’t care; I’ll quit if that’s what it takes to be with you, I’ll go into school and scream at the top of my lungs that I love you.” I told him as I took a step closer to him.

Luke stared at me with a strange face expression I couldn’t quite understand.

“You love me?”

“Yes, I love you Luke.” I whispered placing my hand gently on his cheek.

He smiled and placed his hand softly on top of mine, “I love you too Amanda.” He whispered pressing his lips against mine.

“You’re my shooting star.” He murmured and kissed my cheek embracing me into a hug.

We had made plans to meet in front of the school, we had decided we would walk hand in hand, and determined not to care what other people would say about us. Nobody would stop us.

Except he never showed, and as the day passed so did the murmurs and whispers, I knew something was wrong and then the horrifying news had been announced.

“Lucas Harris, a local student of Nelson high school was found dead this morning deep in the woods. Officers have reported that he was hit in the head several times, causing him to bleed to death. A piece of paper was found in the victims hand reading ‘Luke the puke never learns,’ Word remains open as to who would do such a cruel thing.” The evening news had reported.

I look at my surroundings, noticing I was no longer at the funeral but at the park were Luke and I used to come almost every night. I walk up to a swing and begin to cry, he’s dead, I keep telling myself, but my hear won’t let go.

“You’re my shooting star too.” I whisper, looking up into the sky.