Don't Ever Lose Hope

Alex’s POV

I stood in confusion as I watched my girlfriend leave the room in tears because of me. I noticed the expression of shock and surprise across her face, and then it suddenly dawned on me why she was hurt.
“What the hell did you do that for?!” I yelled at my ex, who was standing across from me, acting as if it was completely normal to be making out when we’re clearly not in any relationship. As soon as the words left my mouth, her eyes filled with pain. Why did I have to be such an ass sometimes? I sat down and sighed, running my fingers through my short, blonde hair.
“I’m sorry Lisa; I didn’t mean to yell like that. You just need to know I have a girlfriend that I am madly in love with and I think we might have taken the kiss that was only supposed to be a peck on the lips a little too far,” I told her more calmly, hoping she didn’t get the wrong message.
She stood up and walked towards me, a smile appearing across her face. “Alex, I understand. It’s my fault; I shouldn’t have pushed you to continue to kiss me when I already knew you weren’t wanting to in the first place,” she told me as a tear slid down her cheek. “Let me fix this, okay?” Before I could say anything else to her she walked off in the direction of the receptionist desk.
I really wish I was able to tell if what she was saying was sincere or if she was just saying shit to get what she wanted. When we dated, I could easily point out when she was telling the truth and when she was lying, but now it was more difficult. I didn’t want to make things worse than they already were, but I knew the things Lisa were capable of doing. She could be ruining any last chances I had with Nicole and I wasn’t about to let that happen. I needed to fix what I messed up and I was sure hoping she would forgive me; if she didn’t, I would have to live with that regret for the rest of my life.
Sliding my hands into my jean pocket, I felt the room key between my fingers. As the little light flashed green signaling me that the door was unlocked, I opened the door in a rush letting it slam against the wall. Standing there, with a tear stained face, was Nicole. The second we locked eyes with each other, she ran into my open embrace. As I rubbed her back and kissed her head, I realized that we weren’t the only ones in our room. Looking up I saw Lisa, a smirk plastered on her face in triumph. Then my eyes landed on another person, a guy to be exact. What he was doing in our room; I didn’t know, but I was about to find out.
“Did he hurt you?” I asked Nicole, a bit harsher than I intended. She looked up at me, tears still streaming down her face, and shook her head. I couldn’t think straight as questions entered my mind. What did Lisa say to Nicole? Why was this guy, who was standing in our room, giving me the death glare? How did he even get in our room in the first place? Then the realization hit me like a ton of bricks. Nicole could have been the only person to let this guy in our room. I slowly let go of Nicole’s grasp she had on me. As she looked up at me, questions and concern written all over her face, I didn’t know what to believe. I sighed, rubbing my face with my hands.
“Can I talk to Nicole….alone?” I asked them trying to stay as calm as I possibly could at the moment. I watched Lisa leave, the smirk still evident on her face. It took all I had in me not to punch this no good loser in the face as I stood there and watched him give my girlfriend a kiss on the cheek. When I heard the door shut behind them, I looked at Nicole. I didn’t even know where to begin so asked the one question that bothered me the most when I first entered our room.
“Would you care to explain who he was and why he just gave you a kiss on the cheek?” I asked her, trying to compose my voice. She didn’t answer right away; instead she looked at the floor, trying not to let another sob escape her mouth.
“Why….why…did Lisa..say those things to me..Alex?” I didn’t know how to respond. I wanted to desperately go over to wear my distraught girlfriend was sitting on the bed and hold her, tell her everything was going to be okay. However, I couldn’t bring myself to go do that without knowing what she did with that guy. I needed to know and was going to find out.
“Did you sleep with him?” I closed my eyes, not really wanting to find out her reaction.
“I can’t believe you just asked me that Alex,” she said barely above a whisper.
“What do you want me to expect when I saw him kiss you on the cheek? He was obviously in our room with you when I wasn’t!” I told her, my voice gradually growing louder with every word I spoke. I didn’t want to get mad, but I needed to get to the bottom of this.
“Do you want to know the honest answer?” I had to move closer to her in order to hear her speak. I nodded my head, uncertain of whether I wanted to hear the truth or not. She sighed, and I instantly assumed the worst was about to come.
“He was there for me when you weren’t Alex. I don’t know what you were thinking when you decided to make out with you slutty ex, but it really hurt me. Obviously you didn’t care enough about our relationship to even realize that.” Her words stabbed me like daggers in the heart; I didn’t expect our talk to go in this direction. I wish it hadn’t, but it’s better to discuss rather than ignore the problems we face, right?
“Nicole, you’re right. I wasn’t thinking and it was a stupid mistake on my part. I wish I could take it back, but I can’t. Please believe me when I say if I could I would. I hope you can forgive me,” I told her hoping she would believe the words I said.
“It isn’t going to be that easy Alex, I hope you realize that.” All I could do was nod my head. Damn, I really messed up big time. I sighed, sitting on the edge of the bed. Without any words being exchanged, I could feel the tension spread across the room.
“Is there anything I can do that would make you change your mind?” I asked, practically begging her for forgiveness.
“What makes you think there is Alex? You hurt me, and I don’t know how I’m ever going to gain your trust back. I love you so much Alex and I think the best thing for the both of us is to be away from each other..at least for right now.” I could see the tears fall from her eyes, and even though she was hurt by this, I didn’t think she realized how much she hurt me by saying those dreaded words.
“Are you breaking up with me Nicole?” I didn’t need to get an answer when I saw her break down and cry in front of me.
“I hope you can believe me when I say that it is for the best,” and with that she walked out of the room, my life, and everything we had was broken, gone. I never felt so empty in my entire life.