Don't Ever Lose Hope

Jack’s POV

Jasey soon fell asleep in my lap. I sat there for a moment, just staring at her. I couldn’t believe she was my daughter. I never thought I would be a dad at the age of 23, but I’ve always wanted kids, and once Alex told me that Jasey was mine I knew I was going to try my best to be the best father I could be. It was only fair to Jasey since she has been living in a foster home since she was an infant. I was still in shock that Marissa kept this a secret for me for so long, and to think that she was trying to win me back on the cruise made me even more irritated about this entire situation. However, I didn’t want to think about that right now. All I cared about at the moment was Jasey and how she looked so peaceful lying in my lap.

“Do you want to put her to bed now Jack?” Alex asked me in a whisper so he wouldn’t wake Jasey. I nodded my head, standing up and lifting Jasey in my arms, carrying her up the stairs. I figured she could sleep in the guest room for now until I can figure out a room for her to stay in. After undoing the covers, I laid her down gently on the bed, trying not to wake her from her sleep. I tucked her in, making sure she was comfortable, before I quietly left the room. As I came back downstairs again I found Alex sitting on the couch, flipping through the channels. I sat next to him, getting tired myself.

“There’s nothing good on,” Alex said as he gave up looking, turning the television off.

“That’s okay. I wanted to talk to you anyway, get your opinions on some things if you don’t mind.” He nodded his head, waiting for me to continue talking. “To be honest, I don’t even know where to begin. Being a dad is so new to me that I’m afraid I won’t be any good at it,” I told him admitting my anxiety about the situation.

“Jack, seeing you with Jasey just a little bit ago proved to me that you are going to be a great dad. You don’t need to worry, and you always have me, Rian and Zack if you ever need help with anything. I understand you might be scared because this is all real new to you, but please believe me when I say that you’re already an awesome dad to Jasey,” he told me with a smile. I smiled back, glad to have those reassuring words from my best friend. It was nice to hear, even though I still had some other things that were bothering me.

“I don’t want to continue to talk about this, but I hope you know that I’m not quitting the band. I just said that out of anger, and looking back, I really regret it. I wish those words never came out of my mouth. It was a stupid thing to say, and I’m truly sorry for saying it. I just wanted you to know that,” I said, looking at Alex.

“I accept your apology Jack. I was hoping you just said it out of anger because I honestly wouldn’t know what to do with myself if you really quit the band. I mean, my fame would be gone if you left,” he said, a smile forming on his face. I shook my head,

“Geez Alex, conceded much?” I asked, laughing, glad he could lighten up the mood on such a poor subject. My smile shortly faded though, these thoughts still running through my mind. “What do I tell Meagan now? I mean, after blowing up at you like that on the phone got me thinking. I realized that you were right all along. I was just being a bitch, only caring about myself. I decided that I would tell her, no matter how much it would hurt, but now it’s going to be even harder with Jasey in the picture,” I told him honestly, running my fingers through my hair.

“All I can say is tell her the truth, man. I know it may seem hard at first, but it’s the right thing to do, and if you want, we’ll all be with you when you break the news to her, if that would help. I’m sure you would have liked to hear me say anything but that, however, telling the truth to someone you love will probably cause you less heartache in the end, you know?” I nod my head in understanding. I knew he was right. I had to tell her; the only question was when, that I wasn’t sure of. “By the way, here’s Jennifer’s card. It has all of her information on it. I figured it would be of good use to you. You can call her anytime if you have any questions about anything, and more importantly, I thought it would be a good idea to sit down with her and discuss getting legal custody over Jasey.” I took the card from his hand, grabbing my iPhone and saving her number so I wouldn’t forget later. “Now, I’m sure you’re really tired, seeing as it is almost four in the morning, so why don’t I get out of your hair so you can get some rest, huh?” he told me standing up from the couch. I noticed it was still raining pretty hard outside.

“Alex, you know you can stay here for the night. Besides, it’s still raining outside. I don’t want you to have to get out in that weather,” I told him. He nodded his head,

“Thanks man, I appreciate it. You think Jasey is doing okay?” As soon as Alex asked the question, a huge crack of thunder was heard outside, causing the power to go out in the house. Then I heard the cries of my daughter from upstairs. It literally tore my heart to hear her upset. I quickly grabbed my phone from the couch, using the light from it to guide my way up the stairs and into the room Jasey was in. I could tell Alex was close behind me from the light on his phone. I walked in the room to see Jasey under the covers, crying.

I shined the light from my phone towards her and she instantly popped her little head out of the covers. I saw tears streaming down her precious face and in that moment I didn’t know how I was going to be able to say “no” to this little girl ever. She would probably get anything she wanted because I wouldn’t have the heart to tell her no and make her upset. I went over to her and sat on the bed. She crawled over to me, instantly wrapping her arms around my neck and resting her head against my chest.

“Daddy, I don’t like the dark,” she told me, tightening her grip around my neck. I kissed the top of her head many times, rubbing her back, hoping that would calm her down. Alex sat down beside me.

“Hey Jasey,” she turned her head towards Alex. He had his phone light shining towards him so she could see him. “Would you like me to sing you a song?” I smiled, thinking that that was a great idea. She nodded her head and smiled a little, her head still resting on my chest. He started singing ‘Remembering Sunday,’ his voice instantly putting Jasey back to sleep. I leaned against the headboard of the bed, getting under the covers, Alex doing the same as he finished singing the song. Jasey was still in my lap, and I could feel her warm breath against my chest. It comforted me. I looked over at Alex, who yawned, “thanks for singing to her. It seemed to help. I think she likes the sound of your voice,” I told him in a whisper, a smile forming on my face. He smiled back.

“I’m glad I could help Jack,” he told me, and with that we both soon fell asleep, Jasey still in my arms. I couldn’t keep a smile off my face.