Hate is the New Love
This Emergency brought you to me
My Mom grabbed my head and smashed it against the wall. If it had been any other person, I would have fought back. But it wasn’t any other person. It was my mother abusing me. That fact always hurt me the most. She smashed her bottle on my head and I tried to hold back tears. It wasn’t because of the pain. It never mattered about pain it was the fact that my mother was in this state that made me cry. Pain to me was nothing. My life is the meaning of pain. So much crap as happened to me that I have become immune to pain. My wall protected me. I leave before anyone can attempt to hurt me.
“You are a terrible daughter!” She seethed. Lightning flashed and thunder rocked our little house. This only muffles my cries. My mom threw me against the wall again and started to kick me until blood gushed out of my mouth. I wanted it to stop but I didn’t say anything. It would only infuriate her more. After a few minutes, which felt like hours, she stopped. She threw me to the floor again and walked away. Pain shoot through my cheeks and my brain told me I had landed on broken glass but I had lost the will to get up. Instead, I cried. I let it all out. The past few months were so good and all of a sudden, this happens!
“I lost my fucking job!” She whispered and disappeared into her room. I don’t know how long I had laid there but soon, I brought myself to my feet and walked to the door. My balance was really bad and I had to grab the wall for support. It was as if my legs were made of jell-o. Taking a walk often helped me clear my mind but I didn’t know if it would have helped this time. She had done a lot of damage. It was still raining buckets and thundering but I kept walking. It was freezing cold but it felt good. I wanted my body to go numb. I wanted to stop the hurt. That when I saw him. It was Justin. I didn’t know if it was a dream or not but it was him.
“Autumn?” He called over the roar of the rain. My legs were weak and I grabbed the fence for support.
“Justin.” I managed to whisper. Justin took off running to me.
“Oh my god Autumn, what happened?”
Thunder shook the ground and lightning illuminated Justin’s drenched face. He looked so scared and hurt. I wanted to tell him that it was going to be okay and that he didn’t need to be scared. My eyelids felt heavy and I closed my eyes. I fell forward and felt Justin’s arm wrap around me. All of a sudden, everything felt so peaceful and nothing hurt anymore. The rain, lightening and thundering stopped and I felt so warm and nothing hurt anymore.
“No autumn!” I heard someone scream. I guessed it was Justin but I was too happy to care. Then, I blacked out.
“You are a terrible daughter!” She seethed. Lightning flashed and thunder rocked our little house. This only muffles my cries. My mom threw me against the wall again and started to kick me until blood gushed out of my mouth. I wanted it to stop but I didn’t say anything. It would only infuriate her more. After a few minutes, which felt like hours, she stopped. She threw me to the floor again and walked away. Pain shoot through my cheeks and my brain told me I had landed on broken glass but I had lost the will to get up. Instead, I cried. I let it all out. The past few months were so good and all of a sudden, this happens!
“I lost my fucking job!” She whispered and disappeared into her room. I don’t know how long I had laid there but soon, I brought myself to my feet and walked to the door. My balance was really bad and I had to grab the wall for support. It was as if my legs were made of jell-o. Taking a walk often helped me clear my mind but I didn’t know if it would have helped this time. She had done a lot of damage. It was still raining buckets and thundering but I kept walking. It was freezing cold but it felt good. I wanted my body to go numb. I wanted to stop the hurt. That when I saw him. It was Justin. I didn’t know if it was a dream or not but it was him.
“Autumn?” He called over the roar of the rain. My legs were weak and I grabbed the fence for support.
“Justin.” I managed to whisper. Justin took off running to me.
“Oh my god Autumn, what happened?”
Thunder shook the ground and lightning illuminated Justin’s drenched face. He looked so scared and hurt. I wanted to tell him that it was going to be okay and that he didn’t need to be scared. My eyelids felt heavy and I closed my eyes. I fell forward and felt Justin’s arm wrap around me. All of a sudden, everything felt so peaceful and nothing hurt anymore. The rain, lightening and thundering stopped and I felt so warm and nothing hurt anymore.
“No autumn!” I heard someone scream. I guessed it was Justin but I was too happy to care. Then, I blacked out.