Not A Soul

Not being in control isn’t on my to do list and that’s exactly what Curt is wanting me to do. I’m not willing to give that up. I hate not being in control. I hate not having a firm grip on things. With my parents I’m always the one bowing down, always the one without a hold on things. I hate it. I don’t want things to be that way.

I want the control. I need it. I feel…scared…without it. I feel weak and useless without control and Curt…Curt wants me to give that up. Even if it’s just once, it’s harder than he thinks. Sure it’s Curt and I know that he doesn’t mean to make me panic. Hell, he probably doesn’t even know how I feel about it. I know that he isn’t going to be like my parents but fuck, that doesn’t keep me from feeling the way I do.

Damn. Maybe I should just get up and leave. It’s not like I can’t get rid of the problem myself but that’ll only cause problems between Curt and I if I go through with that plan. I’m screwed either way.

Taking my bottom lip between my teeth, I continue staring up into Curt’s brown eyes, which are screaming that he isn’t going to budge. It’s either he’s in control tonight or we aren’t doing anything. I’m ok with not doing anything…

It is Curt though. I gave up pretty much everything else for him. What’s one more thing? Even thinking that though doesn’t help. I sigh just as Curt starts to run his fingers up my shirt. He rubs my chest and stomach softly with his fingers, waiting for me to either kick him off or go along with this.The first one is really tempting.

Curt’s lips press softly against my neck. Taking the skin between his teeth, he nibbles softly on the burning flesh and I finally make up my mind.

If it’s Curt, it’s ok.

I bring my hand up to tangle it in his hair. Taking hold of his head, I bring him up to press my lips against his. Curtie smiles against my lips before applying pressure. Our tongues tangle together messily, his managing to make its way into my mouth to run across teeth and tongue.

My erection throbs in appreciation and I grunt. Bring my hips up to grind against his, Curt groans into the kiss and grabs hold of my hips to set a pace between us that he likes best. The last remaining clothes we have are thrown to the side while I kiss down Curtie’s neck.

His hand is searching through the side drawer, desperately trying to find the one thing that he needs. I chuckle and run my hands up and down his sides. Curt grumbles some type of profanity against my cheek at the feel of my fingers wrapping themselves around his cock.

Pumping his shaft, I run my palm over his tip and tease the slit with my thumb. Curtie’s thighs begin to shake and hips thrust desperately into my awaiting hand. With his head in the crock of my neck, his breath burns my skin and sends a shiver down my spine. One of his hands are running up and down my thigh while the other is gripping my hip.

Groaning, Curt finally falls over the edge and shoots his seed into the palm of my head and across our chests. We’re both panting and a sweaty mess but that doesn’t stop Curt from popping the bottle beside my head. The sound makes me cringe but I keep reminding myself that it’s ok because it’s Curt.

He’s nothing like my parents.

At the feel of Curt’s finger pressing against my entrance, I grab a hold of his head, maybe a little rougher than I need to and use the hold I have to crash our lips together. Before he has time to react, I’m pressing my tongue against his, running it across every crevice of his mouth.

Feeling his finger inside me is the most embarrassing and uncomfortable thing to ever happen to me. I had a pride and it is now dead. The second finger only adds to how uncomfortable I feel and my toes end up curling into the sheets in discomfort. I squirm slightly and refuse to pull my lips from Curt’s. He doesn’t seem to mind though.

The third finger stings and I hiss against Curt’s lips. He frowns and pulls away from my lips to kiss down my neck. He sucks and bites at my pulse when suddenly a jolt of pleasure shoots through my veins. My back flies into an arch without my consent and I bite my lip to keep myself from moaning.

Curtie is grinning against my neck when he hits that again and again. Panting, I press my face in the crock of his neck and desperately try not to moan at the feeling of Curt’s fingers attacking my prostate. My arms wrap around his waist, holding him close to me while my hips desperately thrust in rhythm with his fingers in hopes to get that feeling coursing through my veins.

“A-Are you o-ok?” Curt asks, finally removing his fingers and pressing his elbows on either side of my head so that he isn‘t lying on me. I don’t answer and simply glare, which gets him to chuckle. “I take t-that as a yes.”

“Just hurry up for I change my mind,” I growl.

Curt smiles and leans in to press his lips against mine for a short second. With his forehead lying against my own, he presses his erection against me and I wrinkle my nose. My pride isn’t just dead anymore, it’s been ripped to shreds, eaten and shit out.It’s ok though because Curt was the one who destroyed it.

Curt finally pushes himself inside me and I hiss at the feeling while he groans. I’m tempted to use my hold around his waist to pull him away and chuck him across the room but I resist because Curt was in my position before and he put up with it. I guess I can too.

Curt holds tightly onto my hips while waiting for me to tell him it’s ok to move. Grumbling, I bury my face in his hair and hold onto his waist. “Move.”

Curt nods and pulls out to slowly slide back in. A pain shoots up my spine and my hold on Curt tightens until he finally finds my prostate. Pleasure shoots through my veins, sending my back into an arch. A groan passes through my lips and soon Curt is thrusting into me relentlessly.

Each hit to my prostate is bringing me more and more pleasure. It’s rushing through every fiber of my being before running south into my stomach, creating an inferno. I’m moaning Curt’s name into his ear while my fingers dig into his waist. Using the hold on him, I try to get him to move faster. My toes are curling and hips thrusting in rhythm with Curt to get him to go deeper, harder.

Curtie is panting against my cheek, his hair tickles my skin and breath burns it. My dick is throbbing, begging for some type of attention. I reach down for it but Curt smacks my hand away. He presses his lips against my own and grasps my penis in his hand.

The pleasure is continuing to build and build into it actually hurts. The edge is so close and white is starting to take over my vision. Curt is close too. I can tell by the way he’s desperately jerking me off and the way his thrusts are becoming jerky and desperate.

His thumb caresses my tip and that’s what finally has me hitting my climax. Shooting my seed across the both of us, I bite into Curt’s shoulder to keep myself quiet. Curt follows right after me, continuing to move inside me until he’s finally finished.

Panting, he lies on top of me with his head on my chest and arms around my waist. Neither of us move for a few minutes, just drowning in our afterglow. Curt finally pulls himself away and looks down at me with a smile.

“What?” I ask, my voice slightly hoarse.

He shakes his head and only smiles wider. “It’s nothing.”

I roll my eyes before closing them and sighing. I feel Curt press a kiss to my cheek and whisper against it, “I love you, Kelly.”

Sighing, I reply, "I love you too."