So This Might Be My Last Chance

I looked out at the dark night sky, tears slowly trickling down my cheeks. I don’t understand why he would do this. I don’t understand why my boyfriend of 7 months, Paul Swan, would stand me up on prom night. We’ve been through so much together to get where we are now – but he leaves me on the one night I’ve been looking forward to all year? Why?

“Scottie?” my mom asked softly

“Don’t call me that. He called me that,” I said through gritted teeth

“Honey, I’m sure there’s a decent reason why Paul’s late,” my mom soothed, crouching down beside me

I stared at her, not missing her look of shock at the tears on my cheeks and my bloodshot blue eyes.

“He's an HOUR late, mom. He’s probably realized that I’m not good enough for him,” I hissed

“Scott!” my mom gasped, “You know that’s not true!”

“Save it for someone that didn’t get stood up by their boyfriend,” I spat

Without another word I stood up off the front doorstep and started walking down the sidewalk.

“Scott! Where are you going?!” my mom called desperately

I just ignored her. There are no words that I want to say. I shoved my hands in the pockets of my dad’s old tux, shoving the uncomfortable feeling of my tucked-in white shirt to the back of my mind. I have more important things to worry about. Like what I did wrong to make Paul ditch me like he has. I wasn’t being melodramatic when I said I wasn’t good enough for him. I’m really not. In our high school, Paul Swan is a god. He is elegant and graceful like his namesake, but with devilish good looks and a head of blonde hair that he perfects into the rocker-style he fits so well. Tattoos up and down his arms and plugs in his ears only adds to his flawlessness. He is the one everyone wants to be or wants to be with.

But for some reason, he chose me. The skinny, loner artist who has less friends than he can count on his right hand. We contrast in every way. I have olive skin, whereas his is tanned. I have a mop of jet black hair that covers half my face, whereas his is styled to precision. I have blue eyes, he has hazel eyes. He's 6ft3 whereas I'm 5ft9. The list is endless. Yet not once have we had a problem in our 7 month relationship. Well, none that I know of, anyway.

Clearly, I was wrong.

A sob choked up my throat as I heard a crack of lightning and a rumble of thunder above my head, mere seconds before fat raindrops coated my skin.

“IS THERE NOTHING THAT GOES RIGHT FOR ME?!” I hollered into the stormy night

But I carried on walking. What else is there to do? It’s not like I have anywhere to be tonight. The only sound I could hear was the pounding of the rain, onto the sidewalk, onto the road and onto me. My tux and shirt were soaked through, my hair plastered to my face, the constant tears invisible now. My mind travelled to all the warnings, all the snide comments passed my way over the last 7 months. All of them were right.

Paul Swan doesn’t belong with someone like you.
Paul Swan deserves better.
Why is he with a loser like you?
Paul will only hurt you, Scott, he’ll only hurt you.
He’s only using you.
I bet it’s all a game, Paul can’t be interested in him.

And those were the nicer comments. But Paul always swore that all of those cruel words were untrue, that he liked me because I didn’t try to be anyone else. Because I didn’t care that he was Paul Swan. Because I saw the real him. How stupid I was to believe him. A bitter laugh spilt through my lips as I realised how truly stupid I was to believe that the Paul Swan wanted me over anyone else.

I was too caught up in my thoughts to notice a beat-up Impala driving along beside me.

“SCOTTIE!!”

I whimpered as I turned my head to face the boy who had caused all my pain.

“Go away Paul,” I mumbled, starting to walk again.

Paul pulled his car up on the sidewalk, cutting the engine. I ignored him as he jumped out of his car, but I couldn’t ignore him as he ran in front of me, forcing me to stop. My bottom lip trembled at the sight of his crumpled tuxedo and now-soaking white shirt.

“I’m sorry, I’m so so sorry,” he whimpered

“Why?” I choked

“I got home after work and started drinking. I got so drunk that I passed out. My brother...you know Liam...he woke me up about half an hour ago and started screaming and shouting at me, and I got over here as fast as I could. Your mom said you started walking this way about half an hour ago,” Paul said breathlessly

“What? You were drinking? Why?!” I yelped

Paul looked down at his hands, suddenly ashamed. Against my better judgement, I reached up and brushed his wet blonde fringe out of his hazel eyes, forcing him to look at me.

“Why?” I asked softly

“I panicked. I just...panicked. Tonight I planned to...”

Paul trailed off, swallowing heavily. I just stared at him, stroking his cheekbone with my thumb.

“Tonight I planned to tell you that I love you,” Paul finally said

I froze as he said those last three words, my heart skipping a beat. He...loves me. As if sensing the shock in me, Paul grabbed my face in his hands and pressed his lips firmly to mine. I moaned softly, clutching at his waist as he kissed me urgently, as if he never would be able to again. After what seemed like a lifetime, but was really only a couple of minutes, Paul broke the embrace and dropped his hands to my shoulders.

“D-Do you really love me?” I managed to stammer

“More than I’ve ever loved anyone or anything,” Paul said softly, smiling shyly

I chewed my bottom lip, unable to stop my small smile spreading.

“I love you too,” I murmured

A wide grin spread across Paul’s mouth and he pulled me tightly against him in a hug, crushing me to his body.

“Paul! Can’t. Breathe,” I choked

“Sorry, sorry,” Paul chuckled, letting me go

I rested my hands on his shoulders, playing with the ends of his dripping hair. The rain still pounded around us, but it didn’t matter now. Nothing mattered. Paul loves me!

“Blue eyes, what’s wrong?” he asked, frowning

I smiled weakly at the nickname he gave me right at the start of our relationship. He always said he adored my eyes.

“I thought you hadn’t shown up because you realized that I wasn’t good enough for you, like everyone has been telling you I’m not,” I replied sadly

Paul shook his head rapidly, before pressing a short but firm kiss on my lips, leaving me slightly breathless.

“You know I don’t care what anyone thinks. You are perfect for me, and that’s all I care about. I love you, Scottie,” Paul smiled

“I love you too,” I grinned

The feeling of finally being able to say that was amazing. I buried my face in his soaking shirt, smiling as his arms wrapped around me.

“So we can’t really go to Prom looking like this...so can I have the honour of this dance?” Paul murmured in my ear

“But there’s no music,” I frowned, lifting my head

“Do we need any?” Paul mused

I blushed lightly as he held onto my hips, slowly sliding my arms around his shoulders. In silence, we swayed from side to side, just staring into each other’s eyes as the rain poured down around us. He was right, we don’t need any music. All we need is each other. All I need is him. And that’s how it’s going to be – forever.