Take a Sad Song and Make It Better

Jade's POV

Was it wrong to be antisocial? Was it wrong to want to spend time by myself, cooped up in my room with only my iPod and my cellphone? I didn't understand why such a big deal was made when I, Jade Elizabeth Bates, wanted to stay inside my room all day? I mean, its not like I had anything else to do; everyone else was at school, learning for the rest of the day and probably gossiping about the fight earlier that morning.

I could hear their whiny voices now:

“Did you see her? It was completely barbaric the way she jumped on top of them like that.”

“She punched one of them so hard in the face that blood squirted out!”

“I heard she's been expelled.”

“I heard she was arrested.”

“I heard that she killed someone back in her old home town.”

“Well, I heard--”

The list was endless. All lies, unless they were an eyewitness to the fight itself but even those stories could be twisted to captivate any audience.

I sighed, resting my head against the back board of my bed, the wood pounding into my ponytail causing my head to split even further with pain. I looked at my phone: no new messages. Of course.

If I couldn't stand being by myself like this for about an hour, how was I supposed to spend two weeks out of school, jailed up in Aunt Clara's like a prisoner waiting for his jail sentence to finally end, though their time seemed so far away. Much like mine.

Maybe with the path I was headed on, college wouldn't even be an option for me any more: I could always look forward to prison. I'm sure I would make great friends with all the murders and pedophiles. I scoffed at my own thinking, rolling my eyes as I pulled myself from my bed, the ear buds still hanging in my ears and pocketing my phone in the flannel of my pajama pants. I pulled down on the hem of my tank top to cover up my stomach that had been showing as I stood up, fixing it over my pajama pants before making my way out of the room and down the stairs towards the kitchen.

My body ached as I took each step down the wooden steps, each like needles poking and prodding into my sides, head, and muscles. My eye was swollen, that much I knew and ,though I had taken pain pills an hour prior, they were just starting to work. I tried to avoid breathing out my noise as much as possible because it hurt with just a small flare of the nostril; I was almost positive I had either broken it or severely damaged everything little particle that made up my nose. My mouth was any better for breathing because my split lips couldn't be moved with doubling the pain in both my mouth and nose at the same time.

All of this on top of a throbbing headache with a bump on my skull the size of an egg, I was a perfect disaster.

Aunt Clara wasn't home, thank God. She was supposedly out at work but I was pretty sure she was on the verge of losing that job like she had lost a plethora of others in the past; she had never been one to be able to hold a job for long. Walking into the kitchen, I noticed the first and second cabinets I opened were verging on empty: another downfall of Clara's inability to keep work.

The only thing I could find was a bottle of almost expired milk and a box of cereal which, it too, was almost expired.

“Great,” I murmured to myself, closing the refrigerator and looking around the abandoned kitchen. Nothing, just like my social life for the past few hours. Taking my phone out of my pants pocket, I only confirmed my own loneliness: no new messages.

“Fucking fantastic,” I mumbled, slamming the device down on the white counter top before sliding down against the cabinet to the ground; I couldn't think of anything else to do.

Looking around, I started to get bored, so bored in fact that I began to count the tiles that formed the 70s style kitchen. When I had gotten to about 74, I stood up, counting the floor tiles I had been sitting on which concluded my entertainment for the afternoon. I face-palmed my forehead, running my fingers through my hair; that was the most fun I'd had since the fight this morning.

Imagining the way my fist fit perfectly against the Red Head's face as I pounded it hard against her nose and lips, my smirk found its way back to my mouth, a sinister type of grin I could no longer prevent; Mandy would be proud.

I grabbed my phone, intent on calling my friend to tell her of my feat and reminiscence in old fights we had achieved together in the past. Sprinting up the steps and into my room, I tripped, skidding across my bedroom floor and in front of my closet door which was exposed showing off the inside contents.

More specifically, a small duffel bag I had conveniently not unpacked.

And for good reason.

Standing up, I opened the door a little wider, staring down at the small green canvas fabric that had started to collect dust as the zipper hadn't been opened for more than 8 months.

I reached down and grabbed the black handle, pulling it up to more of my height before making my way back to my bed. The bag lay ominously in front of me, begging me to pull the zipper to unlock the secrets I had been hiding in there for months upon months.

So I obeyed.

The zipper buzzed along until the bag was finally opened and I peered inside, immediately smiling at its many contents.

One by one, I pulled out the objects inside: My first vinyl record,

“Hey, I got you something,” Sam said, smiling as he entered my room with his hands behind his back.

“Yeah? Is it a pony?”

“A pony couldn't fit behind my back, silly...” Sam scoffed, rolling his green eyes with his smile widening on his face, “But a unicorn could!”

“You got me a unicorn!” I squealed obnoxiously.

“No.”

“Bitch.”

“Asshole.”

“Whatchya get me?”

From behind his back, Sam pulled out a large vinyl record, the pictures and words burning into my widening eyes.

“Ryan Adams?! Easy Tiger?! That's my favorite album, how did you know?!” I yelled, flinging myself off the bed and into my brother's arms, his laugh filling my ears.

I smiled, placing the record next to me on the bed and picking up the next few items: some marbles, a unicorn doll, a pair of torn winter knit gloves that were worn of color and full of holes, a pair of sunglasses, a deck of obscene playing cards, and a pair of headphones that were still in amazing condition. All from Sam.

Everything in the bag was from Sam.

The bag was Sam.

The last item was a small jewelery box with the initials SJB carved on the top. I pulled it out, opening the small box with careful fingers before finding the dark metallic colored ring, its intricate designs faded forever into the silver and the necklace Sam had given me after my first fight in school. I smiled, lifting the long chain out of the wooden box, my eyes transfixed on the metal peace sign dangling on the end.

Sam's memory flashed through my mind as I remembered clearly my first fight that I participated in at school, a black eye forming on my face as I sat in my room awaiting my fate from my parents. Feet had sounded up from downstairs and barged into my room, my brother's face looking over at me with a disappointed look in his eyes.

“Jay...” He had said, rubbing his hands on his face as he lost his words momentarily before sitting next to me on the bed, “You know you can't solve problems by violence, right?”

“I know,” I had responded, looking up into my older brother's eyes as he smiled softly, reaching in his pocket and fishing out the very necklace I held in my hands.

“Next time you ever fight, or feel the need to fight someone because they've wronged you, I want you to look at this and remember that I'll take care of whatever bad guy wants to hurt you, alright?”

I had believed him, hugging him tightly as I had agreed to his promise.

But where was he now?

Six feet under the ground.

A door slammed shut downstairs as I quickly slid the ring and necklace in the appropriate places, waiting for whoever it was to come upstairs and into my room to investigate whatever it was I was doing. I was hoping that it wasn't Clara.

It wasn't.

It was Alex.

“Hey,” He said, the uncomfortableness clear in his voice as fiddled with the growing strands of brown hair on his head. I nodded, the smirk crawling up my cheeks as Alex squirmed in his own awkwardness, “Um...” Alex scrunched his face up, his expression showing just how confused he was about what was happening with us, me, why I had done what I did and what he was supposed to do in a situation like this; obviously he had never had to deal with this before and it showed through. He was lost and confused.

It was something we shared at that moment though I wouldn't ever let anyone see that.

I knew he wanted to talk about the fight. I knew it simply in his body language and in any humans natural desire to butt their nose in other people's business.

“Can you....can you please explain what happened back...What exactly happened this morning?” Alex stuttered out, dropping his hands from his hair and looking over at me.

“Well, I thought it was obvious; I got in a fight.”

“Besides that,” Alex chuckled gloomily, the tension thickening around us. The silence between us tightened substantially before he cleared his throat, his hands flying back into his hair as he tugged on the clumps of coffee-colored strands in between his fingers. His eyes drifted around the room until they landed on me once more, and then the two necklaces around my neck.

“You're wearing my necklace,” He said, a smile growing on his lips and along with it that damned warm feeling he brought with him. He wasn't even touching me; it was merely the fact that he was around me that I couldn't help but feel like I was floating in a bath of hot chocolate.

“Yeah well, I thought I owed it to you...after today and whatever,” I shrugged, picking up the peace sign in between my fingers and rubbing the metal on my fingertips.

“Why did you do it?” Alex blurted, cringing and squeezing his eyes shut as he mentally slapped himself across the face from the looks of it.

I let out a single chuckle, dropping the metal from my hands and scooting up farther on the headboard.

“Shits and giggles.”

“Seriously, Jade.”

I shrugged, “Its nothing,” I brushed off, picking back up the peace sign between my fingers once more.

“It's not nothing, Jay.” Sam's voice filled my ears and my mouth fell open as tears welled in my eyes. I looked past Alex as my brother's form loomed behind the boy I had fallen for in the months I had lived in Lutherville. Sam's green eyes shimmered along with his form, his clothes cleared of all blood stains that I had remembered so clearly when I had found him in the bathroom that treacherous day. His jeans were clean and his ACDC t-shirt hung off his skinny frame, his hair perfectly disheveled on top his head.

“It's not nothing, Jade. Talk to me, please,” Alex said, his voice tearing me away from the looming hallucination of my brother behind him.

“Talk to him, Jade. Don't be an idiot.” Sam said, shaking his head.

“I don't have to tell you anything.”

“You liar. He wants you to.”

“I know, but I wish you would,” Alex murmured, his brown eyes meeting mine.

“Fine,” I said, dropping the peace sign from my fingers as Sam's figure slowly disappeared. My heart ached as I watched his form fading away; I wanted to reach out and grab him but I knew I would look crazy. Maybe I was. “You really wanna know?”

“Yes. Please,” Alex pleaded, looking deeply into my eyes.

“Those...bimbos? Lisa's friends? They've been hounding me for months because I was close to you. So I taught them a lesson. Happy?”

Alex stood shocked before me, his hand frozen in between his strands of hair. Finally, he spoke again, “You...they...This has been going on for a while?”

“Yup. And now you know.”

“And you didn't think that maybe the right thing could have been to tell me?!” His voice rose surprisingly loud and I smirked, knowing that I was finally breaking him down. I shouldn't have made this occasion so evil sounding, and I know I shouldn't have been happy that I was collapsing a perfectly beautiful relationship, but I needed this. This was the true Jade. If he didn't like it, he didn't know how mean I truly could be.

“No, because I'm a downright bitch. Sorry to disappoint you.”

“Fucking...What the fuck, Bates?! You could have told me that they were bothering you. You could have fucking told me! You didn't have to solve it with your fists,” Alex yelled.

“Well, how the fuck did you want me to introduce it to you, 'Oh, hey Alex, you look nice today. By the way, your ex-girlfriend's best friends are beating the shit outta me. Wanna make out?' Oh yeah, real classy.”

“Well, you didn't have to pull a Rocky and beat the shit out of them.”

“Too late for that,” I spat, jumping up from the bed and walking toward, glowering into his chocolate irises.

“You're still that hard, stubborn bitch you've always been, haven't you?” Alex sneered, glaring down at me.

“And you're still a cocky, self absorbed bastard. Things never change, Gaskarth,” I bit back, venom flowing through my words.

“Why don't you call me when you stop acting like the world's against you,” Alex yelled, turning around and into the hall.

I followed behind, stopping in my doorway as he started down the stairs, “Why don't you call up those bimbos I put in the hospital? I'm sure you three can have plenty to talk about.”

“At least they'd talk to me,” He turned around, his eyes burning into mine from his spot on the steps.

“You know what, fuck you.”

“Yeah, why don't you go call up Bryan and tell him all about how shitty you've made your life,” Alex turned on his heel and darted down the stairs, the slam of the door filling the house. I turned back into my room, picking up the peace sign from between my fingertips again.

“Jade, why do you have to make things so complicated?” Sam's voice filled the air again and I dropped the metal from my fingers, not wanting to see the disappointment on the face of my brother's hallucination.