Mutiny Below

Nick

I woke up late the next morning. My head was pounding slightly, but I figured that would get better with a shower. I stumbled to the front area, eyes half closed. I noticed Jayce’s red hair above the couch instantly, but kept walking toward the kitchen.

I found a pot of coffee on and half gone, a bottle half full of headache relief on the counter, and an empty cereal box beside it. I smiled despite the pain at Jayce’s slight randomness of items before grabbing the medicine. I managed to swallow two pills dry and then trudged back out to the front room, taking a spot next to Jayce.

It was quiet for about two minutes. “John’s gone.” Her voice muttered the words carefully and lowly. Strange how such few words can be so important. The best part though is that she felt the need to tell me, as if she’s just as intrigued to not have him around as I am.

“Where’d he go?” Not like I really care. I bit my bottom lip as guilt creeps into me.

Jayce sighs, heavily. The sound weighs down my own heart even more. “I don’t know. I woke up and he was just gone. There’s no note either so I don’t know when he’s coming back.”

“He could just be at Eric’s.” I finally muster up the energy to turn my head toward her, to look at that beautiful face of hers, even if she does have half of it facing away from me and her eyebrows are scrunched together with a little too much worry and concern.

“Even when he goes to Eric’s he leaves a note.” She seemed to be talking more to herself than me. “There wasn’t any kind of meeting he had this morning either. I know he stayed sober last night so he probably doesn’t have the massive pains of this hangover, but still …” She trailed off and then sighed again. “I don’t know.”

I hated seeing her distraught. I hated that she was distraught over John even more. “Have you tried calling him?” She finally looked at me, those blue eyes widening slightly as they flicked from one side of my face to the other. She shook her head. “Let’s try that before we send out a search party.” I sarcastically remarked as I pulled my phone from my pocket. I started searching through contacts but before I even made it close to John’s number, she placed her hand on top of the phone.

“No.” She mumbled and pushed my hand and the phone down to the couch cushion. “Don’t … don’t call him. It’s fine. John has the right to do whatever he is doing. He deserves my trust and if privacy is what he wants …” She trailed off again and removed her hand as she faced forward.

“I’m not going to let you mope.” I threatened, hoping to lighten her mood at least a little.

“I’m not moping.” She shook her head and then bit her bottom lip as she leaned over to grab the TV remote. “I’m watching BBC with a hangover and,” she paused and looked over at me, her mouth turning down into a frown. “You.”

I couldn’t help but snort. “Thanks, Jayce. I love sitting here with you too.” I laced the words with sarcasm, but it was fake. I actually meant what I said.

“It’s not that Nick. I do … enjoy your company.” She fidgeted and set the remote between us. “It’s just sometimes I don’t know how to label you. Even when it’s just you and I in the room. Calling you just a friend feels so wrong.”

My body warmed. “I don’t think I can ever call you just a friend.”

“But saying anything close to more than friends feels awful too. I just don’t know how to work this out.” She put her head in her hands and rubbed her forehead. “And I so feel like shiiiiit.”

I chuckled and moved the remote, pulling her body toward me by her hips. “Why don’t you lay down then?” I smirked a little as she eyed me suspiciously for a few moments. Then she yawned and stretched out, placing her head in my lap. My hands went to her temples and I gently rubbed them. She moaned loudly and I couldn’t help but laugh. “That good, eh?”

She squinted one eye open at me. “Not in the mood to be funny.”

The TV was quite enough that it didn’t bother either of us. Jayce kept her eyes closed and groaned from time to time. The only time she moved was when her chest rose and fell. And I just watched her. She was so beautiful. Everything about her was just so fucking perfect.

But nothing between Jayce and I ever lasted long enough. It seemed like we’d been alone for only a few minutes before the front door was opening and closing quickly. I sighed as she sat up abruptly, snapping her head toward the door frame.

“Jayce, where’s the Tylenol?” Eric whined as he appeared in the door way by himself, looking an absolute mess. Jayce pointed toward the kitchen and then, as Eric disappeared directly into the kitchen, she laid back down.

I ran my hands through her hair and sighed. I hated how I had to hide everything I felt for her. I inhaled slowly and closed my eyes for a second. It would just take time. Everything would fall into place.

“My head feels like its exploding.” Eric whined as he came back out of the kitchen. He ruffled his hair and sat by Jayce’s feet.

“Join the club.” Jayce muttered as she maneuvered into a ball, pulling her knees to her chest. Eric groaned and slumped over so that his head was on her hip. “Hangover’s suck.”

I chuckled as she placed her hand on my thigh. It took a lot of self-control to focus on something else. I tried changing the subject. “What are you doing over here anyway, Eric? Shouldn’t you be with your girlfriend, letting her baby your hangover?”

Eric’s head popped up for a second as he gave me a funny look. “Nat was gone when I woke up. I thought she was over here.” I shook my head. “That’s weird.” He mumbled before laying his head back down.

“Can we all just stop talking for a few hours?” Jayce pouted and Eric groaned again in agreement. I knotted my fingers in her hair and rested my head on the back on the couch. It wasn’t the most comfortable position to take a nap, but at least Jayce was close enough to touch. I fell asleep to the soft hum of the TV and dreams of the feel of her lips.

When I woke up the TV was off and the room was empty. I rubbed my eyes and glanced around with sleepy confusion. It took a few minutes, but finally I heard the light murmurs coming from the kitchen. The smile was instant as I picked up on Jayce’s voice.

“I really can’t believe you’re hungry.” She giggled and my heart squeezed as I stood up to go to her.

“I can’t either.” Eric chuckled with her. “But I am fucking starving.” As I entered I found Eric sitting on the countertop, looking through some take out menu, and Jayce sitting on the ground with her legs under her.

“Thinking of food still makes me queasy.” She made a face that was just too adorable. I wished I could have had a photo taken. Her eyes slide over to me and her smile widened. “Look! The sleeping princess finally woke up!” They both laughed.

“I didn’t sleep that much.” I defended and crossed my arms. They laughed harder.

“Nick, sweetheart,” Jayce smirked as I tried not to lose it. That face and those words with that voice. Fucking perfect. “It’s almost six. In the evening.”

“Oh.” Eric shook his head as she rolled her eyes. I bit my bottom lip and dragged my eyes from her to keep from doing something more foolish. “Well, damn. I’m hungry too.”

“How do subs sound?” Eric didn’t even look up from the menu.

“Sounds like food.” I shrugged and kept staring at him. “I’m not really picky at this point.”

“Me either.” He sighed and tossed the menus to the side. He leaned forward and frowned.

“Stop thinking about it, Halvo.” Jayce scolded and I furrowed my eyebrows as I looked between them. Eric was still pouting while Jayce was giving him a sympathetic smile. “She’s perfectly fine; especially if she’s with John.”

I stood up straighter. “Who’s with John?”

Eric gave me a side glance. “We think Natalia and John are together since they’re both MIA and neither is answering their cell.”

“And someone keeps freaking out and fretting over it.”

Eric arched his eyebrows. “You’re not the slightest bit concerned about your boyfriend?”

Jayce kept her mouth shut as her blue eyes started to water. I couldn’t take that. “I’m sure they’re fine.” I stood up and gave Eric a look not to push it. He scrunched his eyebrows together and glanced at Jayce. He stared at her for a few moments before his eyes widened and his mouth fell open as he looked back to me. “Let’s order those subs.”

“Uh, yeah, sure.” Eric hurriedly grabbed the menus and dashed out of the kitchen mumbling something about his phone.

I waited until the front door opened and closed again to walk over to her. “You okay, Jayce?” I placed my hand on her back as I squatted down beside her and she scoffed.

“No, I’m not okay.” She spat angrily and brushed my hand off as she stood up. “And I’m not going to be.” She mumbled and stormed out, slamming the door to the bedroom behind her.

I took her place on the floor and covered my face with my hands. Time. It was going to kill me and break Jayce before anything. I sat on the floor in my own self pity for a while before I finally got up and went back to the couch. Eric came back in after a few minutes.

“Where’s Jayce?” His voice sounded funny as he sat on the opposite side of the couch.

“She went back to the bedroom.” I shrugged and looked for the remote, trying hard not to let my bad mood actually show.

Eric cleared his throat. “Can I ask you something?” I picked the remote up and glanced at him before I turned the TV on.

“Sure.”

It took a long time before he said anything else. “This whole pretend-to-be-Nat’s-boyfriend,” he paused and I bit my bottom lip. “It doesn’t have anything to do with Jayce and John, right?”

Why did he have to pick up on this? I faked a snort. “No.”

“Good.” He sighed heavily with relief, making me feel worse. “The way you were looking at her earlier.” He shook his head and our eyes met for a second. I cracked a smile.

“Nothing to worry about.” I tossed the remote to him and watched as he turned his attention to the TV. “When are those subs getting here?” I tried to change the subject and forget that I was lying to one of my closest friends.

“Delivery guy said about twenty minutes.” I groaned and he laughed. Thirty minutes later the food arrived and Jayce wandered out from the bedroom. I kept my eyes mostly on my food and the TV so as not to draw any more attention or suspicion. We ended up watching a movie after we ate and Jayce leaned on Eric. I know she did it on purpose, to pull more attention away from her and I. It made sense, just like my not staring at her. Logically, I knew not to overreact or get jealous. My emotions, on the other hand, didn’t give a shit what I knew. The jealousy flared anyway.

I kept my hands clutched for most of the movie. I’m sure there was a scowl on my face too. It wasn’t until the front door opened and I craned my neck to see John enter the living room that I finally breathed with some ease.

“Hey guys.” John ran his hand through his hair and bit his lip. My eyes averted to Jayce to see her concerned expression that just broke my insides.

“Hey man.” Eric seemed to be the only one actually able to talk or move as he waved at John. “Have you seen Nat, at all?”

John cleared his throat and I glanced at him again. His eyes were roaming all over the room. “Uh, yeah, I just dropped her off at your place.” He stuck his thumb up and pointed toward the door.

“So you did steal her from me?” John’s head shot up as he looked at Eric with his mouth open. “Traitor.” Eric mumbled as he started to stand up. “I guess I’m heading out then. Gotta check on the love of my life and make sure someone didn’t kill her.”

“Stop being over dramatic, Halvo.” Jayce spoke up. Her voice low and even. If only we were alone.

“Peace out.” He waved again and left. John still stood in the doorway, frozen. Something odd was definitely going on.

“You want to come sit and watch this movie with us, babe?” I fought against rolling my eyes as I sat back down, facing toward the TV. John cleared his throat behind me again.

“Actually, Nick,” he sounded awful, almost as awful as I felt. I turned my head with the most innocently curious face I could make. “Would you mind if I spoke to Jayce alone?” His eyebrows were drawn together with his hands on his hips. I glanced between him and her and stood up slowly.

“Not at all. I’ll just go over to Halvo’s. Check on both of them.” I mumbled as I started toward the door, grabbing my phone and cigarettes off the table. I looked back at Jayce before I left. Her blue eyes were wide and frightened. Her mouth pulled down into the saddest frown and her hands fidgeted with the couch cushion.

I wished I could have stood my ground and told John everything right there, just so I wouldn’t have to leave her. But as I got closer to John, I could see he was just as fidgety as she was. I almost smirked as I figured it out. Something had happened earlier.

“Later guys.” I muttered, trying to keep the smirk off my face. Once I got outside though, it broke out. I pulled a cigarette out and fished my lighter out of my pocket, replacing both the lighter and the pack of smokes into my pocket after mine was lit.

On the walk across the complex, my mind wandered. It went over different scenario’s of what could have happened to John earlier. It went over Jayce’s perfect body, as usual, and the feel of hers against mine. It couldn’t be too long now before I could hold her whenever I felt like it, which was all the fucking time.

My phone vibrated as I exhaled the smoke from my lungs heavily. I pulled it out and found a text from Nat asking me where I was. I replied, letting her know I was just outside smoking and then I’d be up to the apartment. However she was already waiting for me outside when I did make it to the apartment.

“I’m done.” She firmly shook her head as I stepped closer. Her arms were crossed and her mouth was pressed close tightly.

“Okay,” I stretched out the vowels. “What exactly are you done with?” I went to bring the cigarette to my lips, but Nat quickly snatched it from me and tossed it to the ground.

“I’m done with all of this. I want to go home.” She stomped on the cigarette and then pouted. We stood their quietly for a few minutes while I let her anger pass.

Once I was sure she was okay, I spoke. “What happened, Nat?” Her shoulders hunched forward as she dropped her eyes to the ground. “You know you can tell me.”

She started glaring at the ground. “John kissed me.” She shifted and then shook her head. “And then he said he was sorry.”

I bit my bottom lip, realizing just how stupid I’d been to drag her into my own troubles. “Nat,” I started with full intention on begging her for forgiveness when she cut me off.

“I just want to go home, Nick.”

Her voice was full of hurt and it killed me, just as much as Jayce’s crying did. I should have noticed she had more feelings for John than she denied. I sighed and ruffled my hair. “I’ve got your ticket already booked for the day we leave for tour. Do you think you can wait till then or you want to get another ticket?”

Her arms fell to her sides. “I guess I can wait.” She frowned deeply and I pulled her into a hug.

“I’m sorry, Nat. For all of this.” I felt a little better when she wrapped her arms around me to return the hug. “I’m just an idiot.”

“I know.” She muttered and I couldn’t help but chuckle. “It’s okay though. I’m used to you being stupid.” She laughed a little too and then pulled away. “I’ll be home in just a few days and then all will go back to normal.” Her voice was hopeful but her eyes were telling me just how upset she really was.

“Except Eric’s going to want to come over and talk to you all the time.” I got her to crack a little smile as she nodded. “You want to break the news to him or shall I?” She glanced in the direction of the apartment and her smile widened.

“I think we can wait until you guys go on tour. I kind of like having him pretend to be my boyfriend.” She giggled as we started toward the door.

“I think he’s enjoying it more than anything.”

“That’s why we’ll wait.” She stopped just before we reached the door, giving me this heartbroken smile that made me hate my own guts. “Someone needs to be happy in all of this.” She shrugged and then went inside. I followed slowly.

I’d hurt my sister, the girl I loved, my friends. I should be surprised Nat hadn’t called me out sooner on the real truth. I was just a selfish bastard that didn’t deserve a chance with Jayce, let alone the great people I was surrounded by.