Miracles Aren't Fiction

Brendon knows that he made a mistake. It was a mistake to say that he didn’t think the relationship could work out when Ryan was so fragile. Brendon doesn’t know what the boy has been through, but from the look in Ryan’s eyes, it had to be too much. As soon as Ryan had left his hospital room, Brendon had felt instant regret. Of course he was lying when he said that Ryan and him couldn’t work out. He wanted nothing more than for the relationship to be successful. The truth, however, is something that Brendon didn’t want to admit, even to himself.

The truth is, Brendon is scared of Pete. He thought that if Pete was capable of beating the living shit out of him, then Pete wouldn’t stop at nothing to have Ryan. What Brendon didn’t expect, was the feelings he had already developed for Ryan. The first month of the school year is barely over and Brendon already feels something dangerously close to protectiveness and maybe even love.

And what’s more, Brendon also now realizes what it means that Pete won’t stop at nothing to get Ryan. He may even go as far as to threaten Ryan himself. Who knows what Pete has already done, based on Ryan’s change of composure and Spencer’s concern.

That’s another reason Brendon is worried about Ryan’s welfare. Spencer had put aside his dislike for Brendon long enough to ask if Brendon had known anything to help him find Ryan. Brendon said all he knew, which wasn’t much, and tried to get information out of Spencer.

That was also when Spencer lost his patience, and started cursing out Brendon with every foul word in the book. Spencer has it in his head that Brendon is to blame for the whole situation. And even though he had said it out of anger, he was closer to the truth than he realized.

So now Brendon feels that it is his personal duty to find out what is making Ryan so insecure. To find out what created those sorrow filled eyes and dark circles. Brendon is afraid of what the reason is going to be.

But what scares Brendon the most is not the reason. He’s wondering if it’s too late to apologize.

********************

He walks slowly to his destination. He wonders why his heart is beating so frantically and why his palms are dripping with sweat. This won’t be his first time and he’s pretty sure it won’t be his last, so why isn’t he used to it yet?

Ryan knows what’s coming to him and it scares him nearly to death to know that there’s almost nothing he can do about it. Sure, he can simply say no, but saying that could possibly put Brendon in danger, and that is the last thing he wants. So he continues to submit to Pete’s demands.

His feet feel like lead and it seems that the distance to where he’s going keeps getting longer. He knows the streets well and can walk this path with his eyes closed. He stops exactly in the center of the park, with the moon exactly in the center of the sky.

This is almost routine to Ryan now. Pete should be showing up any minute now, putting his hands over Ryan’s face just like the first time. Just like every single time after that. Soon, they will walk hand in hand, because that’s how Pete wants it, and then the motel will come into view and Ryan will get that gagging feeling in his throat again.

His chest will tighten up, and his ass will start aching at the very thought of what it’s about to go through. Because Pete gets more violent with every passing night, as if he gains confidence from Ryan’s submission.

He waits for the tears to come and for horror to show itself. It’s always on time, never late.

Pete is never late enough to give Ryan a reason to leave the park. He’s always on time, making Ryan hate life more with every passing minute.

And there, just as Ryan was just starting to hope, the now fam8ilar fingers cover Ryan’s eyes and Ryan can feel the wetness threatening to flood them.

*******************

Spencer knows that it wasn’t right to yell at Brendon like that. He was just so frustrated that he had to let it out on someone, and Brendon had seemed like the perfect target at the time.

He’s just so worried about Ryan nowadays. Ryan doesn’t even speak to Spencer anymore and it’s like he’s being sucked into the shadows at school. People are talking, saying nasty things, like that maybe he’s on drugs, or that he’s sick.

At least Spencer has Jon now. Jon has been supportive of Spencer’s concerns since day one. He even tried to talk to Ryan himself, before Ryan flipped him off and turned his back.

There’s also this sneaking suspicion that Spencer doesn’t want to acknowledge, but he knows that he must.

Is Pete, one of his few friends, responsible for Ryan’s new behavior?