Tour With Me

Natalie’s POV

Breakfast was interesting to say the least, not to mention crowded. It seemed as if everyone had come to Justin’s room for breakfast. Once they heard about Pattie and me cooking breakfast, they decided that it was time for a home cooked meal.

Not only were Justin’s guards there but a few of his backup singers/dancers and Scooter of course, Annabelle and Allan even came, to breakfast, though I clearly didn’t invite them. There was hardly anywhere for anyone to sit. The couches were fill as well as the table. I was practically squished on one of the couches between Justin and Sabrina.

Breakfast was also a bit awkward, for me at least. Ryan and Chaz kept glancing between me and Justin. They would both share a knowing look with Justin every time that he caught them. Something was going on, there was something happening that they knew and I didn’t. There was no denying that they knew something.

Allan kept glancing at me from across the room. He wanted to talk. He was waiting for me to let him explained what had happened.

Eventually I couldn’t take it anymore. I excused myself from the room as I headed towards the door. I motioned for Allan to follow me as I walked past. I turned around to face him once we were in the hallway.

I stood against the wall opposite of the door to Justin’s hotel room. I folded my arms across my chest as I blankly stared at him. I shifted my weight onto my right leg as I looked him up and down.

I wanted it to seem as if I didn’t care. I wanted him to think that what he did had no affect on me. I wanted him to think that no explanation was going to change how I felt about the picture. I didn’t want him to know about how I felt towards the picture. I wanted him to think that he had no affect on me what’s so ever.

Allan sighed as he stared at me. His eyes were pleading with me once more. His expression was soft. He looked more sorrowful than I had ever seen him. My expression immediately softened. I wasn’t heartless, no matter how hard I tried.

“Please dimples,” he softly spoke “Please just hear me out,”

“I’m listening,” I nodded “But that doesn’t mean I’m going to understand,”

“Just try to…for me,”

“I’ll try, but it’s not for you,”

Allan’s gaze dropped to the floor so that I could no longer see his face. His slowly placed his hands into his pockets. I could hear a sigh come from his lips.

I bit my lip as I stood there. He was making this harder on me. I didn’t want to seem as if I was apathetic towards him, but I didn’t want him to think that he could get away with everything. He needed to know that what he did was wrong. There wasn’t a reason that could suffice what he did.

“Natalie…” I immediately tensed up.

Allan had never used my first name. He always called me dimples, never Natalie. I knew that he was serious with whatever he had to say. I didn’t know if I would be able to keep up my hard exterior knowing that he was this serious with me. Allan wasn’t the serious type.

“I’m sorry okay. I know that saying sorry isn’t enough but I don’t know what else to tell you. I don’t know what I was thinking when I sent that picture—”

“You weren’t thinking,” I interrupted.

Allan licked his lips as he looked away from me once more. He looked down the hall, towards the window. His face was more pained that it was before. I felt a pain in my chest as I stared at him. I didn’t want to put him through this, but I had to.

“As true as that may be,” he started “It’s not an excuse. I was just…just so…upset by what you had said that I just wanted to get back at you. You weren’t thinking about me, so I wanted to show that I wasn’t thinking about you either,”

“So that’s what this was, revenge? That’s not an excuse Allan. You actually hurt Sabrina with what you did. She was trying to help you…I still don’t know why she picked that way to help you, but she was, in her own unique way, trying to help,”

“I know, and I feel stupid for doing it,” he flared his arms as he began to raise his voice. His face went from pained, to exasperated. I held my ground, my expression remaining unchanged.

“But I couldn’t help it. I just…I was so upset. It was like you picked him over me. You chose to go off with him, and then you didn’t tell me. Then you made it seem like I was so much worse for you than him—”

“Stop,” I interrupted. “You’re not making any since Allan. You’re saying that I picked him over you, that I gave you the impression that you were worse than him, well worse than him for what,”

“Nothing, nothing,” he shook his head “Forget I said anything,”

I threw my head back as I groaned. Just as we were beginning to a step forward, he takes three steps back.

“No I won’t forget. You were trying to explain why you did it, and now you’re saying that you don’t want to. How am I supposed to forgive you if you don’t explain anything?”

“Well what do you want me to say!!” he yelled.

“I want you to tell me what you’re talking about, or what you’ve been trying to talk about for the past couple of minutes!!” I screamed.

“Fine!! I did it because I was mad at you!! I don’t like you picking Bieber over me!! I don’t like the fact that you’re letting him replace me, and you’re just forgetting about me as if I was never anything to you!!”

“Allan you’re my best friend why would you think that you weren’t anything to me!!!”

“I don’t know!!!!”

I stood there in silence. I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t know how to react to him. It sounded as if Allan was jealous of Justin. The expression on his face only confirmed my assumption, only I still wasn’t sure. In fact, I didn’t want to be sure. I didn’t want Allan to be jealous, because if he was, then that meant something that would only cause more drama.

“Allan…”my voice was soft, as I stared at the floor. I could feel his gaze on me but I refused to meet his.

“Don’t be jealous of Justin,” I began. “He’s not my best friend. He’s something completely different from you. You mean one thing to me and he means another. I’m not going to replace you with him; he’s completely different from you,”

I wasn’t lying to him. I wasn’t going to replace him with Justin. Allan was my best friend, and hopefully always would be. Allan did mean something completely different from what Justin meant to me. Allan was my best friend while Justin was my boyfriend. Those two couldn’t be compared to one another.

“Jealous…who said I was jealous?”

I raised my brow as I looked at him. “So you’re not jealous then,”

“…No,”

I couldn’t control the small smile that crept onto my lips. Allan seemed to notice, because his face seemed to brighten slightly. His familiar smile soon formed on his lips.

“You know what,” he spoke “Why don’t I make it up to you…and Sabrina,”

“How are you going to do that?”

His smile only grew wider as he stared at me. “I have an idea, but you’re going to have to wait to find out,”

I rolled my eyes, as I continued to smile. He was back to normal; these seemed as if they were going back to normal between me and Allan. I was hoping that this time things would stay that way.