Nobody Puts Baby in the Corner

“Alright, Mr. Seward. Everything seems to be in order and you don’t seem to have any lasting medical conditions, so I think you’re free to go.”

A permanent smile was plastered on Johnny’s face. “Perfect. No offense, doc, but I’m more than ready to get out of here.”

“Of course.”, the doctor replied. “You’ve been here for quite awhile.” He pushed a wheelchair into the room and Johnny’s smile faltered.

“What’s that for?”, Johnny asked nervously, gesturing towards the chair.

“Well, Mr. Seward, your spinal cord was severely bruised. For the time being, you probably will have trouble walking normally. And so, until your spinal cord heals, you’ll be using this wheelchair.”

“And how long will that be for?”

“Probably around six to eight weeks.”

“Damn.”, Johnny muttered under his breath.

I leaned down next to his ear. “It’ll be okay. Hey, maybe I’ll give you a lap dance.”

Johnny’s smile instantly reappeared. “Let’s go home!”

“You’re a dumbass.”, I whispered. “I said maybe.”

His gaze fell to his feet. “Partypooper.”, he grumbled.

“Shut up and get your sexy ass into that wheelchair.”, I ordered.

“Help me?”, he whimpered, looking up at me.

“Alright.” I looped my right arm around Johnny’s shoulders, while he slinked his left arm around my waist. I helped him sit up and carefully helped him into the wheelchair.

Johnny slid his hands along the wheels. “How am I supposed to move this thing?”

I playfully squeezed his upper arm. “You’ve got muscles, use them.”

Johnny smiled proudly. “Let’s go home, baby.”

I seized the handles of his wheelchair and pushed him out the door. As I wheeled him down the hall, I ran my fingers through his hair, which had grown long during his stay in the hospital. “You need a haircut.”, I told him.

“Hey!”, he shouted indignantly. “Maybe I like it this long.”

“Well, I don’t.”, I retorted.

“Really?”, he asked, fingering his hair. “I thought you’d like it. Gives you something to grab onto while I ride you.”

His words earned him a slap upside the head. “Shut up.”, I snapped. “And cut your hair, please. You look sexier with short hair.”

“In that case...”, Johnny started. “I’m getting a buzzcut.”

“No!”, I urged. “I like your hair. Just trim it.”

“Okay.”, he agreed. “Anything for you, baby.”

Suddenly, the car was right in front of us, and we both stared at it cluelessly. “Okay, how is this going to work?”, I pondered, looking to Johnny for an answer.

“First things first, wheel me to the other side. I’m driving.”, he stated. He didn’t wait, pushing himself to the other side of the car.

“Oh no!”, I objected. “You just got out of the hospital! You’re in no condition to drive.”

Johnny threw his hands into the air. “Oh, come on! What, are you going to take away my manhood next?”

“Oh, I don’t think I want to do that.”, I answered slyly, and it was Johnny’s turn to blush.

“Now who’s the perv?”, he asked, grinning.

“Still you.”, I retorted, helping him out of his chair. I opened the passenger-side door and slid him into the seat. I walked around to the driver’s side and stepped into the car myself.

“This sucks.”, Johnny pouted. “I want to drive.”

“Quit being a baby.”, I told him, putting the car into drive.

“I am not being a baby.”, Johnny countered. “I just want to drive.”

“Shut up.”

. . .

“Ow.”, I mumbled as I stumbled over Johnny, who had parked himself in the front doorway. “What the hell are you doing?”

“Looking at my house. I missed it.”, he answered. “Come here, baby.” He gently pulled me down onto his lap and kissed me passionately. “I missed that, too.”, he added.

“So did I.”, he whispered, kissing him again.

“You know what else I missed?”, he asked, running his hand up my side.

“What?”, I asked, playing along.

“This.” He pressed his lips roughly against my collarbone. I tipped my head back, my hair falling in front of my face, and moaned softly. Johnny slinked his arms around my waist and slipped his hands under my shirt, resting them on my stomach. Then I felt Johnny’s erection, hard against my leg, and I pulled away from him.

“Johnny.”, I breathed. “Not now, okay?”

“Oh, come on. “, Johnny cooed. “You can’t say you didn’t miss that.”

“No, I can’t.”, I stated. “But not right now.”

Johnny softly stroked my thigh. “Why wait?”, he whispered. “Hayliee, baby, I haven’t had sex in two and a half months.”

“Neither have I.”, I retorted. “But I can wait. And so can you.”

“Alright.”, he pouted. “So, uh...what do we do now?”

“Well, we could talk about setting a wedding date.”, I said.

“Okay.”, Johnny agreed. “But I think we should move out of the doorway.” Johnny gripped the wheels of his chair and pushed. We started rolling forward, albeit slowly, Johnny working hard to move our combined weight.

“Johnny, I can walk to the living room by myself.” I pushed away from Johnny, attempting to stand up, but Johnny wrapped his arms tightly around my waist.

“No. I can move both of us.”, he declared. I shrugged, giving in, and settled myself against Johnny. The ride to the living room was over quickly, but when Johnny stopped, I was in no hurry to get off of his lap. "Baby, are you just going to sit there all night?”, Johnny asked, laughing.

I stroked his chest. “Maybe.”

“Well, why you’re there, we should talk about setting a wedding date.”

“Okay.” I thought for a minute. “I was thinking maybe sometime in April. When the weather is perfect, and the sunset at the beach is absolutely breathtaking.”

“Baby, April isn’t very far away.”, Johnny warned. “It’s already January. And like you said, there’s a lot of planning to be done-”

I pressed my lips to his, silencing him. I pulled away and smirked at the look that appeared on his face.

“Now who talks too much?”, I remarked. “You sound like me. And, I think three months is long enough to plan our wedding. It probably won’t be very big, depending on how many family members you invite, since my family isn’t very big. And if we wait any longer, it’ll be too hot.” I paused and looked at him knowingly. “And the sooner we have the wedding, the sooner we can get to the honeymoon.”

“Sold!”, Johnny shouted. “Okay, so April. Now a date.”

“You pick.”, I told him.

“Okay...” Johnny closed his eyes for a minutes. “April tenth.”

“April tenth.”, I repeated. “Perfect I’m going to marry the man of my dreams on April tenth.”

Johnny grinned. “I want to get married now. I wish we could just elope and get it over with.”

“You’d better not!”

Johnny and I both jumped, turning towards the door. We’d been so caught up in each other and our wedding, we hadn’t noticed Zacky, Emmy, Callie, Brian, Jimmy, and Matt standing in the doorway.

“You’d better not elope!”, Emmy repeated. “I want to go to your wedding.”

“We can’t elope, Emmy.”, I informed her. “I’m Jewish, remember?”

“So, we couldn’t help but overhear...”, Callie started. I shot her a ‘look’ and she glanced away. “You settled on a wedding date?”

“Yes, we did.”, I stated. “It’s-”

“April tenth.”, Brian supplied. “We heard.”

I flipped him off, but he just laughed. “What are you guys doing here anyway?”, I asked.

“Well, we came to see our good buddy now that he’s out of the hospital!”, Jimmy cheered, slapping Johnny on the back. Johnny’s face contorted into a grimace. “I’m sorry.”, Jimmy apologized.

“And...and!” Zacky raised his hand and jumped into the air. “I’m here to show off my new girl.” He looped his arm around Emmy’s waist and pulled her close to him. She giggled.

“Okay, we most definitely are not here so Zacky can show off Emmy.”, Brian declared. “We’re here to visit Johnny. And big surprise, we catch you two making out. Again.”

“I’m a little surprised we didn’t catch them fucking.”, Zacky added with a sly grin.

“Shut up, Zack, before I get up out of this chair and kick your ass.”, Johnny growled.

Zacky held out his hands. “Come and get me, cripple.”

“Alright boys, cool it.”, Matt laughed. “I don’t think we need another guitarist in a wheelchair.”

“What?”, Zacky gasped. “Are you saying you think Johnny could beat me up?”

“No.” Brian smiled. “But maybe Hayliee could.”

“Hey!”, Johnny and Zacky exclaimed in unison.

I giggled and snuggled closer to Johnny. “Don’t worry.”, I whispered into his ear. “I’m sure you could beat Zacky up.”

“God, you two really are like rabbits.”, Brian commented.

“All over each other all the time.”, Zacky added.

“It’s kinda gross.”, Matt finished.

“Hey.”, Johnny said defensively. “You guys do shit like that all the time.”

“Yea, but we don’t make you watch.”, Zacky countered.

“I think it’s sweet.”, Emmy stated.

“Well, in that case...” Zacky scooped Emmy into his arms and pressed his lips to hers, kissing her passionately.

I reached out and slapped Zack on the shoulder. “Nu-huh. If Johnny and I can’t do that, neither can you.”

Suddenly, Emmy grabbed mine and Callie’s wrists and yanked us into the foyer. “Guys, I need your advice on something.”

“What?” As if I didn’t already know.

“It’s Zacky.”, she said.

Callie’s jaw dropped in shock. “Did you sleep with him? Jeez, don’t you think that’s moving a little fast, Emmy?”

“I didn’t sleep with him.”, she corrected. “But I want to. I think our relationship has reached a point where we’re ready for more intimacy. I mean, we’ve been dating for almost three months.”

“Well, then what do you need us for?”, I asked.

“Well, it’s just that...Zacky has a lot more experience than I do.”

“Well, that shouldn’t matter.”, Callie stated.

“But I’m worried I won’t be able to keep up with him.”, Emmy fretted.

“Emmy.”, I yelled. “Johnny has a lot more experience that I do. But that doesn’t matter. Because being with a guy more experienced than you is amazing. Johnny knows exactly what he’s doing.”

“Thank you, Hayliee.”, Callie said sarcastically.

“You’re welcome.”, I said smugly. “Like I was saying, being with a guy with more experience than you is better than being with a guy with equal or less experience. The sex is way better.”

“Okay.”, Emmy mumbled. “I guess I feel better about it now. But how do I do it? I mean, I don’t think I could just say ‘let’s have sex’.”

“Do something romantic.”, I stated. “Do something to lead up to it, so it won’t seem as awkward.”

“And if Zacky really cares about you, he won’t try to rush right into the sex.”, Callie said.

“Alright.”, Emmy whispered. “I guess that’s what I’ll do.”

“Oh, ladies?”, Brian trilled, sticking his head into the foyer. “If you’re done with your girl talk, we’re going out to eat.”

Emmy, Callie, and I looked at each other and shrugged. “Okay.”, we said in unison.