Lost & Found.

The monotony no longer had a shot at killing me because I was so sure that pure boredom would beat it to me. No matter how much I tried to convince myself that this wasn’t monotonous, I knew that it, in fact, was.

Drive, stop, drive, stop, sleep, drive, stop.

It was a never ending cycle and I was getting sick of it. I promised myself I would only do this for two more days at the most before settling into the nicest hotel room I could find until I felt the hole in my pocket.

I shoved the piece of pizza into my mouth, taking a big bite before setting it, and the napkin I was using as a plate, onto the table next to the bed. I pulled my laptop onto my crossed legs, exposed due to the shorts I hadn’t realized I’d packed.

I was going to regret having only one pair of shorts. It was getting hotter and hotter outside and I had, unwittingly, packed only jeans.

I pulled up Google and typed in ‘Poughkeepsie’ and scrolled past the map and the ‘official site’. As I passed the Wiki page for I seemed to find myself in a completely different territory. Every blue link my eyes fell upon had the words ‘Poughkeepsie Tapes’ shoved in them. I passed them quickly, assuming it was some old movie that I’d never bothered to watch.

Giving up I went back to the map and clicked the small link next to it, there was nothing better to do.

“Poughkeepsie, New York.” I muttered, trying the word upon my tongue. I stumbled with it and decided I’d just call it Poo. “Poo is a city in the state of New York, the United States, which serves as the county seat of Dutchess County. Poo is located in the Hudson River Valley midway between New York City and Albany. The name derives from blah, blah, blah.” I became bored almost instantly. “Who knew such a weird name could produce such boring shit?” I wondered aloud, trying to avoid my phone, which, of course, was ringing again.

I had caved and plugged it in and it was currently vibrating loudly against the wall of my motel room.

I already regretted stopping this early in a town this boring.

I flipped the page to YouTube, clicking on the first link I saw and then clicking the second link at the side of the page after that video finished.

I sighed. This was what my life had become.

Random YouTube videos and dirty motel rooms in funny named towns.

If you would have told me two months ago that my life would be this far in ruins I would have just known you were insane. Or jealous.

Maybe both.

I pushed the computer to the side and rested my forehead against my upturned palms. Just why was this happening to me?

And for a second I let myself believe it was all lies.

~~~

“...I don’t just want to be a footnote in someone else’s happiness. Does your husband know the way that the sunshine gleams from your wedding band? Does he know the way, does he know the way of the crickets that would convince me to call it a night?”

I had finally found a song on one of Kendra’s many CDs that I knew and I was going to sing along to it as loudly and for as long as I pleased.

I had driven to Albany, the capital, before taking a left, off of the interstate. I followed the same, almost perfectly straight, road until I saw a green sign that read Cooperstown. Unable to resist the irony, I turned to go through.

I wasn’t a huge fan, but maybe I could walk through the Base Ball Hall of Fame.

Who knows with me anymore?

I ended up spending around an hour walking aimlessly around in Cooperstown before getting back into my silver car and going back to driving.

I passed through a plethora of oddly named towns this time. Among them were Horseheads, Corning, Wellsboro, and Renovo. I stopped in Lock Haven and then again in Bloomsburg.

I decided Shenandoah sounded nice enough to sleep at, since it was already around ten at night, and I could hardly keep my eyes open and focused on the road anymore.

I pulled into the first motel I could find and, as quickly as possible, got a room. I ran back to my car, feeling the rain coming and wanting to get everything into my room before the downpour came. I pulled it all onto my shoulder at the same time and the weight almost made my knees give out.

Luckily, I made it into the room before collapsing with the door shut behind me. I was tired and the pit in my stomach told me that I’d gone too long without stopping for food. I stood, just barely, and drug my bags so they were closer to the bed before falling onto the bed.

The minute my back hit the rough comforter I knew that there wasn’t any chance that I would be getting back up. I did, however, scoot myself up the bed until my head found the soft comfort of a pillow. I reached underneath it to hug it to my head, just laying there and blinking. Slowly, ever so slowly, thoughts started spinning around inside my head. They fluttered around like graceful butterflies as I just laid there, unmoving.

There were so many questions and there was only one I could honestly answer. What time is it? Ten twenty-two. What would become of me at the end of this little trip? Where was I headed anyway? What would I find there? Why had I snapped in the first place?

Actually, I had a pretty solid theory on that one.

Not that I could remember it right now.

The thoughts slowly dispersed as I became too tired to understand what the words meant. They became just words. Mush, to my lethargic mind.

So I just stared. The wall in front of me was brown with an indescribable pattern to it. One minute I was staring at a pineapple the next it was a cloud and then suddenly it was clearly a bunny.

Never mind, maybe it was a turtle.

My eyelids became too heavy to move so I let them slide closed slowly and I drifted into a heavy sleep.