Nobody Can See
001.
January 2007
"I'm sick and tired of her fucking attitude!" screamed my mother to my father. I was sitting right there and everything, but when she started tripping' she pretended I wasn't there and talked like I couldn't hear her.
"Mom! You're being retarded right now!" I always had to censor myself when I was about to snap on her, "I'm like, 10 minutes late!" I defended myself.
"I know, but what you need to understand is that you shouldn't have went out today at all," my dad tried talking in a nicer tone than my dumb mother.
"Oh my fucking god, you guys never have any legitimate reasons for coming down on me so hard!" I hollered, charging up the stairs to retrieve my jacket.
"If you set one foot out that door, you better not bother coming back at all," my mother warned me in the most vicious tone you could ever imagine.
I stopped for a moment, and laughed. I turned around and stared down my mother, "Oh don't you worry, Mother. I will never come back. I'm finished with you," I growled, "Dad, I love you," I added.
Then, I grabbed my school bag and threw it on my back, taking my first step of freedom as I entered the cool, sweet summer night. Today had been the last day of my tenth grade in school. I went to my parents, ready to reconcile a week before and they'd welcomed me back to live at home. I came home ten minutes late, and my mother exploded into a fit of rage.
I pulled out my cell phone. I was extremely grateful that I had had my charger packed in my school bad this morning, which meant I had it now. Quickly, I flew through my contacts list and called Joshuah's cell.
He answered on the second ring, "Bree? What's up?" he asked, worry in his voice, "It's eleven thirty, shouldn't you be sleeping?" his voice changed gears to anger.
"Josh, my parents kicked me out. I have nowhere to go, can you come pick me up please, Hun?" I asked him.
I heard keys jingle in the background, "I'm already out the door, where are you?" he asked, a car door opened this time.
"Fern hill park," I told him, "I'm sitting on the swing," I told him.
"I'll be there stat," he informed me, then I heard the car engine start.
What I didn't know at the time was this was the biggest mistake of my life. I never should have called Joshuah to come and get me. I shouldn't have went to him to steal my innocence and new found independence away.
But I did, not thinking about it at the time. I mean, I knew he yelled and got angry a lot, but he'd never raise a fist at me ever. We'd been together since the beginning of ninth grade, and we were both just out of the tenth now. I knew and loved him, he wasn't perfect, but he was perfect for me, and I for him.
Headlights flashed in the parking lot about fifteen minutes later, and Josh emerged from the driver's side coming up to me quickly.
"Bree? Is everything okay?" he asked me, hugging me while I sat in the swing, sulking on the inside, but a stoic mask plastered on the outside.
"Yes, I'm fine. Really, I am completely fine. I don't even care, I'm glad I'm out of that shit house," I said with a disguised tone.
"Good, that's my girl," he said pulling me into a kiss. I didn't want to kiss him, or be even near him. I loved him when he was like this, but somehow I was having trouble convincing myself this was the real him. All the names he'd shot at me over the past year and a half, all the screaming and threats.
But I had to believe he was amazing, because he was all I really had, "I love you so much, Josh," I whispered and pulled him closer.
"I'm sick and tired of her fucking attitude!" screamed my mother to my father. I was sitting right there and everything, but when she started tripping' she pretended I wasn't there and talked like I couldn't hear her.
"Mom! You're being retarded right now!" I always had to censor myself when I was about to snap on her, "I'm like, 10 minutes late!" I defended myself.
"I know, but what you need to understand is that you shouldn't have went out today at all," my dad tried talking in a nicer tone than my dumb mother.
"Oh my fucking god, you guys never have any legitimate reasons for coming down on me so hard!" I hollered, charging up the stairs to retrieve my jacket.
"If you set one foot out that door, you better not bother coming back at all," my mother warned me in the most vicious tone you could ever imagine.
I stopped for a moment, and laughed. I turned around and stared down my mother, "Oh don't you worry, Mother. I will never come back. I'm finished with you," I growled, "Dad, I love you," I added.
Then, I grabbed my school bag and threw it on my back, taking my first step of freedom as I entered the cool, sweet summer night. Today had been the last day of my tenth grade in school. I went to my parents, ready to reconcile a week before and they'd welcomed me back to live at home. I came home ten minutes late, and my mother exploded into a fit of rage.
I pulled out my cell phone. I was extremely grateful that I had had my charger packed in my school bad this morning, which meant I had it now. Quickly, I flew through my contacts list and called Joshuah's cell.
He answered on the second ring, "Bree? What's up?" he asked, worry in his voice, "It's eleven thirty, shouldn't you be sleeping?" his voice changed gears to anger.
"Josh, my parents kicked me out. I have nowhere to go, can you come pick me up please, Hun?" I asked him.
I heard keys jingle in the background, "I'm already out the door, where are you?" he asked, a car door opened this time.
"Fern hill park," I told him, "I'm sitting on the swing," I told him.
"I'll be there stat," he informed me, then I heard the car engine start.
What I didn't know at the time was this was the biggest mistake of my life. I never should have called Joshuah to come and get me. I shouldn't have went to him to steal my innocence and new found independence away.
But I did, not thinking about it at the time. I mean, I knew he yelled and got angry a lot, but he'd never raise a fist at me ever. We'd been together since the beginning of ninth grade, and we were both just out of the tenth now. I knew and loved him, he wasn't perfect, but he was perfect for me, and I for him.
Headlights flashed in the parking lot about fifteen minutes later, and Josh emerged from the driver's side coming up to me quickly.
"Bree? Is everything okay?" he asked me, hugging me while I sat in the swing, sulking on the inside, but a stoic mask plastered on the outside.
"Yes, I'm fine. Really, I am completely fine. I don't even care, I'm glad I'm out of that shit house," I said with a disguised tone.
"Good, that's my girl," he said pulling me into a kiss. I didn't want to kiss him, or be even near him. I loved him when he was like this, but somehow I was having trouble convincing myself this was the real him. All the names he'd shot at me over the past year and a half, all the screaming and threats.
But I had to believe he was amazing, because he was all I really had, "I love you so much, Josh," I whispered and pulled him closer.