Status: slowly active(:
Two Months
Introduction.
“What are you talking about?”I asked flippantly, tossing my long blonde hair over my shoulder.
“I’m talking about you missing Spanish class again.” Kody said, leaning down so that his breath tickled my face.
I hate it when he does this. I hate it how observant he is sometimes. I hate it, hate it, hate it. It makes it so hard to be normal.
“Kody,” I sighed, “why do you care what classes I miss? It’s not like you’re responsible for me.”
He looked away awkwardly. I sighed again and then my leg twitched.
“What was that?” He seemed alarmed.
“Nothing, nothing, it was nothing. I have to go” I pushed him away from me and hurried towards the girls’ room.
I pushed the door open and just barely made it to a stall before the tremors took over. My legs, arms, hands, fingers, toes, feet, everything began to tremble. I just breathed deeply and waited for it to pass, as I knew it would.
“Lily??” Shit. He was right outside the bathroom.
“Lily!” I breathed in and out.
“LILY?!?” It would all be over soon.
“LILY!!!!!” I could blame it on cramps, or a sickness. Kody didn’t need to know. Kody didn’t need to fear. Kody didn’t need to watch me die.
Eventually the tremors stopped. I left the stall and glanced at the mirror. Not too bad for my third episode today. Kody had stopped yelling my name too. I hoped that meant someone had made him leave. I tip-toed quietly to the door. I opened the door as quietly as I could and stuck my head out. I looked left, all clear. I looked right…damn!
“Kody! You almost gave me a heart attack!! Why are out here anyways?”
“I just wanted to make sure you were okay.” He mumbled, looking down.
“Well I’m fine. Thanks.” I tried to walk away but he grabbed my arm and pulled me back.
“Lily. You’re not fine. Something is wrong. Tell me. Please.” He brought his face up to mine and the look in his eyes was almost enough to make me relent and tell him. Almost.
“I’m just sick okay. It’s nothing. Some flu. Relax, and get back to class.” I pushed his arm away and tried walking again. No such luck. He followed me.
“Lily, I’m not stupid. I don’t care what it is, just tell me. I don’t even care if it’s that you want me to leave you alone forever and ever. I just want to know these things.”
I spun around, angry again. How dare he put me in this situation! How dare he ask me to tell him everything! Even my voice didn’t hide my anger.
“Kody, I don’t want to tell you! Get it through your head, I don’t want you knowing everything about me! I don’t want you being concerned and acting like you care! And I definitely don’t want you following me!!!” I pushed him away and sped off down the hall.
I could hear his footsteps behind me, loud, running footsteps. Even if I did run track, I wasn’t faster than him. I stopped and spun around again, catching him off guard.
“LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!!!!” I screamed in his face.
I saw him crumple inside, but I didn’t care. Kody didn’t get the privilege of knowing my every thought and emotion anymore. It wasn’t his job to care. Tears streaming, I ran through the front hall and outside. I ran out to the track and crumpled in the grass. Luckily there was no class out here to witness my pain. The overcast sky opened up and began to pour its tears onto my back. I didn’t move. I was missing the last two periods of the day but it didn’t matter. I had gotten a doctor’s note long ago excusing me from all classes. I didn’t even know why I went anymore. As if learning how to conjugate Spanish verbs in the preterit or dissecting a clam was going to save me. It wasn’t. Nothing would save me now.
“I’m talking about you missing Spanish class again.” Kody said, leaning down so that his breath tickled my face.
I hate it when he does this. I hate it how observant he is sometimes. I hate it, hate it, hate it. It makes it so hard to be normal.
“Kody,” I sighed, “why do you care what classes I miss? It’s not like you’re responsible for me.”
He looked away awkwardly. I sighed again and then my leg twitched.
“What was that?” He seemed alarmed.
“Nothing, nothing, it was nothing. I have to go” I pushed him away from me and hurried towards the girls’ room.
I pushed the door open and just barely made it to a stall before the tremors took over. My legs, arms, hands, fingers, toes, feet, everything began to tremble. I just breathed deeply and waited for it to pass, as I knew it would.
“Lily??” Shit. He was right outside the bathroom.
“Lily!” I breathed in and out.
“LILY?!?” It would all be over soon.
“LILY!!!!!” I could blame it on cramps, or a sickness. Kody didn’t need to know. Kody didn’t need to fear. Kody didn’t need to watch me die.
Eventually the tremors stopped. I left the stall and glanced at the mirror. Not too bad for my third episode today. Kody had stopped yelling my name too. I hoped that meant someone had made him leave. I tip-toed quietly to the door. I opened the door as quietly as I could and stuck my head out. I looked left, all clear. I looked right…damn!
“Kody! You almost gave me a heart attack!! Why are out here anyways?”
“I just wanted to make sure you were okay.” He mumbled, looking down.
“Well I’m fine. Thanks.” I tried to walk away but he grabbed my arm and pulled me back.
“Lily. You’re not fine. Something is wrong. Tell me. Please.” He brought his face up to mine and the look in his eyes was almost enough to make me relent and tell him. Almost.
“I’m just sick okay. It’s nothing. Some flu. Relax, and get back to class.” I pushed his arm away and tried walking again. No such luck. He followed me.
“Lily, I’m not stupid. I don’t care what it is, just tell me. I don’t even care if it’s that you want me to leave you alone forever and ever. I just want to know these things.”
I spun around, angry again. How dare he put me in this situation! How dare he ask me to tell him everything! Even my voice didn’t hide my anger.
“Kody, I don’t want to tell you! Get it through your head, I don’t want you knowing everything about me! I don’t want you being concerned and acting like you care! And I definitely don’t want you following me!!!” I pushed him away and sped off down the hall.
I could hear his footsteps behind me, loud, running footsteps. Even if I did run track, I wasn’t faster than him. I stopped and spun around again, catching him off guard.
“LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!!!!” I screamed in his face.
I saw him crumple inside, but I didn’t care. Kody didn’t get the privilege of knowing my every thought and emotion anymore. It wasn’t his job to care. Tears streaming, I ran through the front hall and outside. I ran out to the track and crumpled in the grass. Luckily there was no class out here to witness my pain. The overcast sky opened up and began to pour its tears onto my back. I didn’t move. I was missing the last two periods of the day but it didn’t matter. I had gotten a doctor’s note long ago excusing me from all classes. I didn’t even know why I went anymore. As if learning how to conjugate Spanish verbs in the preterit or dissecting a clam was going to save me. It wasn’t. Nothing would save me now.