I Can Transform You

POV: Gerard

Eventually, my music stopped on its own accord, another album coming to an end. This time I didn’t rush to my stereo to put on another album; I just laid there, listening as the sounds of regular life filtered into my head.

I was almost expecting Frank’s voice to sound again… To hear him begging me to talk to him. But I heard nothing except the ringing in my ears from the loud music that had been raping them for the last three hours or so.

It seemed that Frank had finally given up and left, but I still didn’t risk leaving the safety of my bedroom. There was still a chance he was in this house, and I was still in no state to talk to him.

All of a sudden, another sound penetrated my eardrums. My phone vibrating loudly on my bedside table. I remained lying face down on my pillow, reaching blindly for my phone, and then lifting it half-heartedly and bringing it to my ear. I knew it wouldn’t be Frank, because he doesn’t have my number, so I just answered it carelessly without looking.

“Yeah?”

My voice was muffled; I was talking into my pillow and I didn’t care. I wasn’t in the mood for fucking small talk. Whoever it was needed to get straight to the point.

And that they did.

“I heard what happened with you and Matty in school earlier… Shit, man. Have you really been expelled?” It was Ray. He sounded very concerned.

I exhaled heavily, turning over to lie on my back, staring up at my ceiling vacantly.

“Yeah,” I repeated, this time in a clearer voice.

Part of me wanted to talk to Ray, because I definitely needed someone to talk to… But the other half of me just wanted to hang up and not talk to anyone. I wanted to be left to my own devices… To become a social recluse.

“That’s fucking ridiculous! Matty’s the one that should have been excluded, not you!” Ray exclaimed, disgusted by the injustice of this situation.

I was personally over the whole expulsion thing. School was the last thing I cared about. In fact, I was kinda glad to be rid of the place.

Before I had a chance to reply with another mundane answer, there was rustling on Ray’s end of the line, and suddenly another voice started ranting.

“Have you heard the rumours Matty has been spreading about you?”

Oh, hello Bob.

I wasn’t aware of the rumours flying around, and I wasn’t really interested about what he was telling everyone. I knew it was probably about my mother, or Frank, and it would break my heart.

I didn’t answer, but Bob felt obliged to continue and give me an explanation after a few seconds of silence.

“He’s telling everyone you’re in love with Frank!”

Oh. What a surprise.

“That’s original,” I sighed, wishing I could declare the rumour false without being a liar.

I didn’t even know if Matty was saying that just to wind me up, or if he could actually see right through me… Did he know the truth?

“Don’t worry, I stuck up for you, man,” Bob assured me, his words ironically having the opposite effect to not making me worry…

Hell, now I was worried.

“Uh, what did you do?”

Bob can get pretty feisty… You wouldn’t think it of him, but he loves a good argument.

“I just made it clear to Matty that you’ve always hated Frank, and the only reason you started hanging out with his gang in the first place was to get revenge on him,” Bob explained nonchalantly.

I’m sure that went down well...

On the one hand, I was grateful to Bob for trying to stick up for me… But on the other, I wished he wouldn’t get involved. He would just make things worse. He didn’t even know the full story… He didn’t know the truth.

“Oh, right. I bet you really convinced him,” I replied sarcastically, running my fingers through my knotted hair.

“Yeah, I didn’t at first... But after I printed off our MSN conversation, he didn’t have a lot to say,” Bob replied in the same nonchalant manner.

I frowned to myself, confused. My memory of this was hazy.

“Our MSN conversation?” I repeated blankly.

“Yeah, you know, that conversation we had on MSN a few weeks ago about ruining Frank’s life,” Bob explained impatiently, and the realisation finally hit me.

“Oh, Jesus. I forgot about that,” I spoke slowly, trying to remember exactly what I had said in that conversation. I was paranoid by the thought of Matty reading it.

“Yeah, well, it shut Matty up!” Bob chuckled. “He was strangely intrigued by it… Like he never would have guessed you were the devious type.”

Well, I don’t doubt he was intrigued. He probably can’t wait to tell Frank all about that conversation. And you know what? I hope he does… It will hopefully make Frank hate me and finally fucking leave me alone.

“I’m surprised he didn’t try and kill you for revealing our plot against Frank,” I muttered, shocked that Bob had reported no broken ribs or anything. After all, Matty is a fucking animal.

“Nah, he doesn’t care about anyone but himself. If we were plotting against him I’m sure I would be lying unconscious somewhere right now, but because it was Frank, he didn’t care,” Bob reasoned.

Hmm, very true. Matty is a self-centered asshole, and he doesn’t give a flying fuck about Frank. He probably finds my whole plan for revenge on him hilarious… But I’m sure Frank won’t be so amused by it.

***

POV: Frank

After sitting outside Gerard’s bedroom for over an hour, I eventually gave up. I decided to give him some time to cool off… He couldn’t avoid me forever, but I’d give him at least a few days to calm down.

I wanted to see Lydia, and I knew she was still in school, so I went back there reluctantly, in search of her. It was lunch time and the corridors were filled with rowdy students, but I spotted her long blonde hair from the other end of the corridor.

She was stood by her locker, talking to Matty. I intruded quite happily on their conversation, which was looking rather intense before I showed up.

“Hey, what you guys talking about?” I questioned, kissing Lydia on the cheek as I appeared at her side, snaking an arm round her waist.

Lydia jumped slightly at the interruption, looking from Matty to me in alarm.

“Jesus, you scared me,” she admitted, clutching her heart dramatically.

I frowned slightly and smirked at the same time.

“Was the conversation really that intense?” I cocked an eyebrow, looking from Matty to Lydia questioningly.

Matty just glared at me, a hard expression on his face.

“N-no, you just came out of nowhere! Where have you been?” Lydia demanded quickly.

I shrugged. “I went home for a bit.”

“To find Gerard?” Matty figured, arching an eyebrow. There was a knowing look in his eye, like he even knew how the conversation between Gerard and I had gone down.

It was a bit unsettling.

“Uh, yeah,” I nodded, narrowing my eyes at Matty. “Did you really have to tell him about the plan? He’s kicked me out of his room over this. Now I have nowhere to fucking sleep.”

(Obviously that is the least of my worries… But I’m not going to stand here and confess my undying love for Gerard in front of my girlfriend and homophobic best friend, am I?)

“Hmm, I bet you’re heartbroken,” Matty retorted flatly, and the scary thing was, he didn’t even sound sarcastic. Again, it was like he knew.

We stared at eachother with furrowed eyebrows and rigid expressions for a moment, and I realised how high the tension between us was. I wondered what the fuck was going on.

“Speaking of your lover-boy, I’ve got a present for you,” Matty suddenly broke the uncomfortable silence, rummaging around in his school bag for something.

I felt pissed off and embarrassed that he had called Gerard my ‘lover-boy’ in front of my girlfriend, but those emotions were quickly overtaken by confusion and curiosity as to what the ‘present’ could be. Was it from Gerard?

Lydia and I exchanged blank glances as Matty searched in his bag, and then, he suddenly pulled out a folded piece of paper and handed it to me. I took it from him hesitantly, furrowing my eyebrows at it.

“What’s this?”

There was a dark hint of amusement in Matty’s eyes that made me nervous for some reason.

“Gerard’s friend gave it to me earlier. It’s a conversation he and Gerard had over MSN a few weeks ago,” Matty revealed unexpectedly.

I frowned deeper and removed my arm from around Lydia to unfold the piece of paper, looking down at Gerard’s conversation in my hands.

Bob-o-san says: Oh, Geraaard. You make my heart burnnn.

Bob-o-san says: Do you like my song? :)

Geetard says: It’s genius, Bob

…What the fuck am I even reading?

Geetard says: Dude, you will not BELIEVE what has happened to me today.

Bob-o-san says: You fell in your toilet and transformed into a unicorn?

Geetard says: Pfft, that happens every day. But no, THIS… This is huge.

Bob-o-san says: Okay, NOW I’m intrigued…

…You and me both, Bob-o-san, you and me both…

Geetard says: Right, well, basically, I bought Frank Iero a new photo frame (cuz I broke his and I felt bad) and I gave it to him at school today, and he was pretty nice about it to start off with. He said thanks and stuff...

...Oh God, I forgot this even happened; it feels like a lifetime ago…

Bob-o-san says: Frank Iero being… nice?! O_o That’s insane.

Geetard says: Yeah, but then his friends came along and he completely changed and was like “oh stop kissing my ass”

Geetard says: So then his twattish friends beat me up :/

Bob-o-san says: What the hell! That two-faced little fuck! Urgh. Are you okay, man?

…Alright, back the fuck off, Bob-o-san! I am aware that wasn’t my finest moment…

Geetard says: Yeah I’m fine. That fire alarm saved my ass... I was saved by the bell quite literally. I managed to get away with nothing but a bleeding nose and lip.

Bob-o-san says: You should really tell someone about the bullying. It’s gone on long enough.

Geetard says: Hmm. Things just got interesting though…

Bob-o-san says: Whaddya mean?

Geetard says: Frank just came and found me and apologised.

Bob-o-san says: Omg really? What the fuck?!

Geetard says: Yeah, really! I know right, wtf?

Bob-o-san says: Maybe he’s up to something..

Geetard says: Oh he’s definitely up to something. Man, he fucking asked me if I wanted to be part of his gang!

Bob-o-san says: Are you shitting me?

Geetard says: No! He said he could make me popular!

Reading this provoked a flashback in my mind to the day I caught Gerard self-harming in his bathroom. I decided in that moment that I wanted to help him. I wanted to make him happy… To make him popular… To transform him.

Bob-o-san says: =O <- That’s me staring at the computer screen with my mouth wide open right now.

Geetard says: My face is more like this -> =S

Bob-o-san says: Srsly, though, he’s a shifty fucker. Don’t trust him, Gerard.

Geetard says: Don’t worry, I won’t. I told him to fuck off!

Bob-o-san says: That’s probably the smartest thing to do.

Bob-o-san says: Although…

Geetard says: …Although what?

Bob-o-san says: You could actually take him up on that offer.

Geetard says: Are you insane?

Bob-o-san says: Yes, but just hear me out…

Bob-o-san says: If you went along with his plan, you could finally get revenge!

Geetard says: Keep talking…

…No, don’t keep talking. I don’t think I like the way this conversation is going…

Bob-o-san says: Well, if you hang around with him for a few weeks or whatever and let him “make you popular” then you could find out more about him…

Bob-o-san says: And you could uncover his secrets and then spill them to the whole school! You could ruin his reputation completely if you found out something bad enough...

Bob-o-san says: OH or even better, you could STEAL his reputation! If he keeps his word and actually makes you popular, you could gradually push him out of the picture and take his place as the most popular kid in school! And you can get rid of his army of dipshits and make me and Ray popular too… kthnx.

Geetard says: Now THAT would be some sweet revenge!

I stopped reading there. I’d read enough. My hands were starting to tremble with the collision of emotions I was suddenly bottling inside.

Anger. Frustration. Sadness. Confusion.

I’d always wondered why Gerard ever agreed to hang around with a gang of people who used to beat him up, and now I knew. He was plotting against me… Intent on getting revenge.

But the thing that hurt most about this was the fact that Gerard was currently making such a big deal out of my initial ‘plan’ of ruining his reputation, when he had exactly the same one. He was fucking guilty of the same thing, so how he could he be angry with me? His anger was not justified.

I screwed the piece of paper up and clenched it tightly in my fist, looking up at Matty with darkened eyes.

“I personally found it hilarious that he thought he could steal your reputation,” Matty smirked, but there was a taunting look in his eyes. He knew I didn’t find this the least bit funny.

“Well... that Bob-o-san kid is gonna get fucking punched next time I see him,” I declared flatly, trying to focus my negative energy on someone that wasn’t Gerard.

I didn’t want to lose my temper with Gerard and add to the endless drama between us, but I was already at breaking point. I needed to take it out on someone.

I needed to talk to Gerard. Whether he liked it or not… If I had to break into his bedroom through the fucking window, I was going to get him to talk to me.