I Can Transform You

Proposal

POV: Frank

Fuck Gerard. I don’t need this shit. If he refuses to believe me, then fine. I don’t need him. Yeah, fuck this. If he’s giving up, so am I. I don’t care. It’s over. Fine by me.

I grabbed some of my clothes and necessary items that were lying in a heap on the landing, shoved them all in a backpack, and stormed out of the house, making sure to slam the front door as hard as I could behind me.

I was so fucking angry. And not even with Gerard; with myself, for getting myself into this state. For letting down my guard and falling for someone I was never destined to be anything more than enemies with. I was so stupid to ever mess with Gerard.

I was trying to focus all my emotion on being angry and full of hate, because it was what I did best… But the tears that were forming in my eyes were proof that hurt and sadness were taking over. I blinked them away impatiently, trying to ignore the pain inside, as I jumped in my car and reversed from the driveway at high speed.

I knew what I had to do now… I had to forget about him and move on with my life. I needed a new start. Something new and exciting.

In a matter of minutes, I was pulling up outside Lydia’s house, and forcing myself to get my shit together and put on a brave face. I couldn’t let my girlfriend see me being pathetic and crying. That’d be so embarrassing. I’m not meant to be the fucking girl in this relationship.

I took several deep breaths to compose myself and waited for my eyes to dry before grabbing my backpack and getting out of my car.

Of course it was Lydia’s mother who answered the front door, with her usual unwelcoming glare. I would normally return the disapproving stare, but I really had to be on my best behaviour now, since I impregnated her daughter and everything. So I faked a smile and greeted her in a falsely sweet voice.

“Oh, hello Mrs. Ross! You look nice today… Is that a new haircut?”

Small talk, urgh. Kill me now.

I almost wanted to punch myself for being so fake, but it was a necessary requirement this time. My future was pretty much dependent on her liking me, after all.

“Oh, yes, uh, thank you Frank,” she blushed, clearly surprised by this complimentary side to me.

I could tell by the way she didn’t ignore my compliment and start shouting at me that Lydia still hadn’t told her she was pregnant. (And I didn’t blame her… Her parents would really go mental.)

“Is Lydia in?” I enquired predictably.

As if by magic at the mention of her name, Lydia appeared in the doorway, pushing her mum out of the way in the process.

“Hey,” she greeted me, a little out of breath from running down the stairs. She shoved her long blonde hair out of her face impatiently.

“Hey yourself,” I smiled. “You up to much?”

She shook her head and reached out to take my hand and pull me inside. The movement was so sudden I almost tripped up the step into her house.

“Someone’s a bit eager,” I smirked, raising my eyebrows.

“I’m just happy to see you,” she replied sweetly, reaching up to peck my lips.

My lips curled into a small smile and I kissed her back, pleased by her enthusiasm.

Her mum, however, was not so pleased.

“Ahem,” she cleared her throat, letting us know she was still standing there. “That’s enough of that.”

Like fuck is it.

Lydia pulled away from my lips, rolled her eyes at her Mother, and dragged me by the hand up the stairs.

When we were in the safety of her bedroom, with the door closed, I quizzed her on the pregnancy situation.

“So, you haven’t told your mum yet then?”

I sat down her comfy double bed and kicked off my shoes. It seemed like so long since I had even been in her bedroom. That tells you the kind of dry spell our relationship has been going through… But thankfully she’s stopped avoiding me now.

“No, I can’t. She’ll just tell me how disappointed she is, and that I’m throwing my life away, and then she’ll try and talk me into having an abortion,” Lydia sighed, floating round her room and tidying things away to make it more presentable. As if I cared about the mess.

“And you definitely don’t want an abortion?” I tried to clarify, watching her closely.

She froze in her steps and just looked down at the wooden floor for a while. I could practically hear the conflicting war of voices in her head.

After a few extensive seconds that felt like hours, she lifted her eyes to meet mine, and then shook her head.

“I want this baby,” she told me confidently.

I slowly rose to my feet and walked over to stand in front of her, our eyes still locked together. My hand came forward to caress her cheek lovingly.

“Me too,” I replied with a smile.

I wasn’t even being fake anymore. I was genuinely excited about being a father… I was about to start a new chapter in my life and I couldn’t wait for the current one to end.

I kissed her again, but only a brief brush of my lips on hers. When we parted, we stayed standing in an embrace; her hands around my neck and mine on her waist.

Then, she suddenly dropped her gaze to floor, noticing for the first time I had come with a bag.

“Planning on staying the night, are you?” She arched an eyebrow at me.

I half-shrugged, giving her a lop-sided smile.

“Or several nights...?” My voice intonation made it clear I was asking her permission to stay here, and not just making a statement.

She furrowed her eyebrows slightly.

“Why, do you need a place to stay or something?”

I wasn’t really in desperate need of a roof over my head… I knew my mum would make sure I had somewhere to sleep back at Gerard’s house. But I preferred the idea of Lydia’s bed, than the sofa in the living room back at that house. I also preferred to be in a different house than Gerard right now.

“Yeah, kind of. Gerard kicked me out of his room,” I explained bitterly, trying not to dwell on the thought of Gerard for too long. It was painful to talk about him, and I didn’t need him corrupting my mind anymore. “See, he found out about mine and Matty’s plan to ruin his life, and uh, he wasn’t too happy.”

Lydia gave me a kind of ‘I-told-you-so’ look, which I felt was rather uncalled for, considering she didn’t tell me anything.

“You were asking for that to happen, babe,” she voiced her thoughts.

I really wasn’t. I tried everything in my power to make sure Gerard didn’t kick me out. But he did, so… I’ll get over it.

“So, can I stay here for a while?” I returned to my original question, ignoring her comment completely.

She shrugged and nodded at the same time.
“I guess so. My parents will freak out though, you know what they’re like…”

Yes. They’re old-fashioned and irritating with their moral values and religious views.

“Yeah, yeah, they think I’m a bad influence on you,” I retorted, rolling my eyes. “I don’t know where they got that idea… I mean, if anything you’re the bad influence on me!” I teased her, winking.

It’s kinda true though. I wasn’t half the rebel I am today before I met Lydia. She had a reputation for liking bad boys… And I fancied the pants off of her, so I needed to become the hardcore, tough kid I am today (on the outside) to get her.

“Oh shh you,” she giggled, pulling my face closer to hers by the back of my neck. I almost went a bit cross-eyed staring in her eyes, and I turned my focus to her lips, which were only an inch from mine. “I’m a good girl,” she whispered in an innocent voice.

“Mm, course you are,” I smirked, kissing her fiercely. She took my face in her hands and kissed me back passionately.

The kiss lasted longer than I was aiming for, turning into a full-on make-out session, but I wasn’t complaining. It felt like ages since I’d been able to kiss her like this because we’d been so distant from eachother recently. (It was probably due to the fact that my thoughts had been circling obsessively on Gerard the last week or so.)

“Fuck, I’ve missed you,” she breathed hotly against my lips, breaking the kiss for a second.

She grabbed a fistful of my shirt and started pulling me forward, towards her rather inviting double bed. Clearly she wanted to take things further. She seemed to be in the mood for it tonight, and I was too; desperate to rekindle our flame and feel close to her again.

“Missed you too,” I murmured, crawling on top of her as she lay down on the bed.

She looked so gorgeous with her hair spread out across the sheets, her cheeks slightly flushed, her eyes swirling with lust, and her lips parted and waiting for mine.

My lips wasted no time before ravishing her in kisses, along her jaw, then down to her neck, where I attacked her sensitive spot, causing her to moan quietly.

She was wearing a summery strap-top that needed getting rid of in this moment of heat. My hands went underneath it, preparing to lift it up, but they froze on her stomach, feeling her pregnant tummy.

She didn’t even have much of a bump yet, but it just suddenly hit me that there was a baby inside of her. My baby. It was just the craziest and most amazing thing, and I still couldn’t believe it.

“We’re gonna be parents,” I mumbled against her neck, my voice barely more than a whisper.

The statement was obvious, but I just had to say it out loud to make sure this was real.

I suddenly stopped what I was doing of giving Lydia a hicky, and leaned back to look her in the eyes.

She nodded slowly, placing her hand on my arm.

“It’s crazy, right?”

So, so crazy.

“Yeah,” I agreed slowly, my eyes wandering back and forth as something seemed to suddenly click into place in my head. “Speaking of crazy…”

I scrambled off of her, jumping to my feet without another word. I could feel her blue eyes piercing into me as I picked up my backpack and started rummaging around in it, searching frantically.

“Um, what are you doing?” She asked uncertainly, sitting up on the bed.

“I just- I have something for you,” I replied vaguely, finally finding what I was looking for.

I pulled the gift bag out and then removed the packaging, because it wasn’t a gift anymore… It was a declaration of love and promise.

I turned around to face Lydia holding the small box in my hand. Inside the box was the ring I bought her a few days ago, and I was about to use it for a different reason than I initially intended.

She stared at it curiously, and her eyes got wider as she realised what it was. Before I could walk back to the bed, she was jumping up off of it and coming to stand right in front of me.

“W-what is that…? Are y-you-?” She stuttered in confusion, looking up at me with questioning eyes.

I took a deep breath and prepared to pour my heart out. In fact, I was pretty much just giving her my heart.

“I love you, Lydia. And I want to be with you, to raise that baby with you, forever,” I declared boldly, opening the velvet box with shaky hands to reveal the ring.

I’d never really been one for great speeches or anything, and I wasn’t really the old-fashioned type to get down on one knee and do this, but I was giving it my best shot.

She stared at the ring incredulously, lifting her hand up to cover her mouth as it fell open in shock. I took her other hand in mine, intertwining our fingers. She looked up at me with wide eyes and whispered “oh my God.”

She knew what was coming, but she didn’t seem to believe it was actually happening. I almost couldn’t believe it either. I didn’t even stop to think “what the fuck am I doing?” because it felt so right.

“Marry me,” I spoke, my voice more pleading than commanding.

She didn’t say anything for what seemed like minutes on end. Her eyes just darted from mine to the ring several times, making sure this was real.

Then, she finally broke her silence.

“I- I don’t know, Frank,” she stammered, running her fingers through her hair in distress, and looking around the room like she was waiting for someone to tell her what to do. Or just a sign. Anything. “This is insane! We’re only seventeen!” She was shaking her head now, rejecting me.

I understood her shock and confusion, but I didn’t accept her rejection. Once the insanity had died down, she would realise she loved me, and she needed to be in a secure relationship where she knows the father isn’t ever going to walk out. And that’s what I’m proving to her now.

“We don’t have to get married right away… We could wait a few years,” I reasoned, begging her with my eyes. “I’m just proposing now, because I know my feelings aren’t going to change… I want to spend the rest of my life with you, Lyds.”

Gerard is out of the picture, so there’s nothing standing in the way of us anymore. I know I’ll never have him, so I can settle for Lydia. She’s perfect for me.

“Wow, Frank, I… I don’t know what to say,” she stumbled over her words, her eyes searching mine for security and sincerity.

“Say you’ll marry me,” I pleaded insistently.

She hesitated, looking down at the ring again, and then at our intertwined fingers, and then finally back up at me. Her eyes were glistening with tears, and her mouth twitched into a smile.

“Okay,” she eventually accepted.

Even though it was what I was waiting for, I almost didn’t believe my ears. Did she just say she’d marry me?

“Okay?” I repeated in shock.

She nodded, her smile getting wider and a single tear of happiness rolling down her cheek.

“Yes… I’ll marry you!” She exclaimed, throwing her arms around my neck and hugging me tightly. I wrapped my arms round her too, holding her close.

So that means… Holy shit. I’m engaged!
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