I Can Transform You

POV: Frank

It was past midnight by the time I got back to Lydia’s. She was fast asleep, so I undressed as quietly as I could and then slipped into bed beside her.

I tried so hard to close my eyes and just shut off my brain, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t stop thinking about everything that had happened tonight. Seriously, my thoughts would not shut the fuck up.

First, I got engaged to Lydia. Then, I find out my mother is also engaged, to Gerard’s father. Then, I fell into Gerard’s arms once again, unable to resist desire… But I fell straight back out of his arms, and shit went down between us. Again.

All we ever do anymore is argue. And I mean like, full-blown arguments. I miss the days when Gerard never used to argue back to me, because nothing I said bothered him. When I used to spit insults at him like they didn’t mean shit. I actually want that relationship of mutual hate back, because this love-hate situation is so fucked up.

But the tables have completely turned now. I did exactly what I set out to do, but with heartbreaking consequences; I transformed Gerard and he transformed me.

It’s weird; I’ve changed, but I’m still the same… I’m still a fake. A liar. A cheat. The only difference is there is a massive crack in my hard exterior now; Gerard broke down my guard and everyone is starting to see through the cracks now. Especially Matty. My friendship with him is suffering right now, I can feel it.

As for Gerard, he’s changed completely. He’s no longer the shy, loser kid that is invisible to everyone… People started noticing him the day he started hanging out with me, and now that he’s been excluded from school for fighting with Matty, his status has just gone through the roof.

Even though Matty is one of the most popular kids in school, everyone seems to love the fact that Gerard attacked him in Math class. It’s literally the talk of the school. His name is the one on everyone’s lips…

“Did you hear about that Gerard kid?” “You know Gerard Way? He punched Matty in the face and got excluded!” “Man, I was wrong about Gerard. He’s actually pretty bad-ass.”

He is like a completely different person now, with a completely different reputation.

He used to be a complete pushover, but he doesn’t take anyone’s shit anymore. It seems that he learnt from the master to be more cold-hearted and backstabbing, throwing around words like they’re knives… But I clearly taught him to play my own game too well, because his latest words cut right through me.

“Your precious girlfriend is clearly sleeping with your so-called best friend behind your back.”

How could he say that? Was it just to hurt me, like I hurt him, or was there some truth in the statement?

Through the darkness, my contemplative eyes rested on my girlfriend, sleeping peacefully beside me, her long hair covering her face. She was so beautiful, both inside and out. She would never deceive me like that… She was my angel.

I continued to stare at her thoughtfully, listening to her breathing softly. I could already feel my heart breaking at the devastating thought alone of her cheating on me with my best friend. And no matter how much I tried to reassure myself that Gerard was just lying, there was a voice in my head saying “stop being so blind!”

The voices were driving me insane, and in the end, I couldn’t take it anymore.

I reached out a hand to Lydia and gently pushed a strand of her hair out of her face, tucking it behind her ear. She’s a very light sleeper, so when I started to caress her face, my fingers tracing over her cheek, she began to stir suddenly.

“Hmm?” She made a small noise, putting her hand over mine on her face, but keeping her eyes shut.

“Baby, I need to ask you something,” I whispered tentatively, my worried eyes fixated on her face right in front of mine.

She finally blinked her eyes open and they instantly locked with mine.

“What?” She murmured drowsily, furrowing her eyebrows a little.

I slowly slipped my hand out from under hers and moved it away from her face, feeling nervous about my next question.

“Is there anything going on between you and Matty?”

As soon as my question was out there and I saw the look on her face, I wished I hadn’t said anything. But I knew I would’ve regretted saying nothing too, so either way, regret was inevitable.

“Me… and Matty?” She repeated, frowning harder. Then, she suddenly sat bolt upright in bed and turned on her bedside lamp, lighting up the room.

I sat up too, staring at her with raised eyebrows, waiting for her to answer the question, instead of just repeating it.

“Frank, what the fuck are you talking about?” She demanded, looking offended by my accusation.

I didn’t like how she was responding to my question with more questions. She wasn’t giving me a proper answer.

“Gerard told me the two of you have been going behind my back… I just want you to tell me it’s not true,” I explained as calmly as I could.

It was a simple enough request. I needed to hear her say Gerard was lying.

“What the fuck do you take me for?” She hissed, shaking her head angrily.

Again with the questions… Still no answer...

“I’m just making sure he was lying! So, tell me there’s nothing between you and Matty…”

We were both getting angrier with each passing second. The way she kept delaying a straightforward answer was not reassuring me in the slightest. I was really starting to wonder what the truth was.

“Of course there’s nothing between us! You shouldn’t even have to make sure, Frank! We’ve been together for two years… You think I’d fucking cheat on you with your best friend?” She exploded, crossing her arms across her chest guardedly.

She was clearly insulted by my lack of trust in her. But I couldn’t help being curious… Her and Matty had been a lot closer recently, whereas me and her had been drifting apart. As much as it killed me to admit, I’d been having my doubts. But her response had finally put my mind at ease again.

And now I felt bad for ever doubting her.

“I’m sorry!” I apologised frantically. “It’s just… Well, uh, you and Matty do seem a lot closer recently…”

I probably shouldn’t have said that… I was just rubbing salt in the wound now. But I’d been needing to get that off my chest for a while, so fuck it.

“Oh, so that means I must be fucking him, does it?” She questioned incredulously, arching a perfectly-shaped eyebrow at me.

“Well, no… but I don’t know. What is going on with you two?”

Seriously. They’ve been hanging out together without me more than I approve of recently.

“Nothing! We’re friends. Is that a crime now?” She enquired defensively.

“Well, no…” I muttered, biting my tongue to stop my jealousy speaking for me and saying “yes it is a fucking crime. I want you to stay away from him.” I knew that would not go down well at all. I don’t control Lydia. I can’t tell her who she can be friends with.

Besides, it’s down to my own insecurities that I don’t like the fact that they are close to eachother. Having had a girlfriend cheat on me with a best friend before means I have a fucking hard time trusting people now.

“I’m so glad you trust me,” she snapped sarcastically, looking away from me coldly.

“I do trust you… You’re like the only person that I trust,” I said quickly, moving closer to her in the bed. “I’m sorry, I just get paranoid sometimes. You are the best thing that’s ever happened to me and I don’t want to lose you, okay?” I added, kissing her shoulder lightly and snaking my arm around her waist.

She sighed, melting into my arms, turning back to look at me.

“You’re the best thing that’s happened to me too… I don’t want to lose you either,” she told me softly, looking me in the eye.

I stared at her contently for a second before leaning in to kiss her tenderly.

I know my feelings for Gerard are strong, but my relationship with Lydia is stronger. There is nothing he can do to tear us apart... I'm not scared of his revenge.

***

POV: Gerard

The following morning I woke up with a smile on my face. A cold-hearted, evil smile. It was the day I was going to put my plan into action. I was going get payback on Frank for the years of bullying, the lies and the backstabbing.

And it would begin in Principal Harrison’s office at school. (I know, strange choice of setting… But I had a meeting scheduled there, so. That’s why.)

The smirk was still in place on my lips as I strutted down the corridors at school, like I fucking owned them. I held my head high walking past my peers, noticing the looks of disbelief on all of their faces. I heard my name amongst the murmuring at least a dozen times too.

It was weird for me that so many people even knew my name. I guessed news had spread fast about mine and Matty’s punch-up, and they were surprised to see me back so soon, after the drama I caused only yesterday.

I’m not gonna lie, I felt like some kind of higher being. I could feel a sense of admiration, as well as shock, in the air. No one at this Goddamn school ever took me for someone who would stand up for myself like I did. It seemed that I’d gained some popularity marks for messing with one of the most popular kids in school.

“Gerard!” a familiar voice suddenly called from a crowd.

My eyes fell on a big bushy afro, and Ray suddenly came bounding over to me.

“Hey man,” I greeted cheerfully.

“You’re back!” he shrewdly observed, holding his hands up in disbelief.

Everyone else was still very much gathered at the sidelines, watching on, looking flabbergasted.

I half-shrugged.

“I have some unfinished business.”

This response ignited a lot more murmuring from my peers, gossiping about what my ‘unfinished business’ may be. But within seconds, the hallway was deadly silent again, everyone listening carefully for me to tell them myself.

I enjoyed the attention. Ray, on the other hand, seemed unnerved by it.

He opened his mouth to say something, but then suddenly seemed to become aware of his surroundings, and snapped it shut.

“Um. Shall we go somewhere and talk?” He asked in a small voice, unsettled by the eerie silence and the eavesdropping students.

I smirked and shook my head. “Can’t, sorry. I’m on a tight schedule today.”

First, I have a date with Principal Harrison, then I’m putting plan ‘ruin-Frank Iero’s-life’ into action. Oh, and Mikey wants me to buy him some hair gel later. So yeah, I don’t really have time to stand around and chat.

“Catch you later!” I bade farewell to a confused-looking Ray, continuing in my footsteps to Harrison’s office.