Sincerely, Selphie

Selphie was listening minutely to Kairi, who paced but inches away from her.

Dearest

Selphie quickly erased that. Too cliche to start a love letter.

(And do you know what was on the wall in the secret place?)

"No."

It wasn't like Selphie to be so quiet with Kairi around.

Beautiful Kairi,

That was better. She wasn't used to writing love letters to other people. She usually recieved them, normally from Tidus. She should know what would make a girl's heart ache.

(A picture of him and me! Feeding each other a poapu fruit!)

"Aw, how sweet."

Selphie couldn't look up and acknowledge Kairi's existence. If she did, she might forget where she was and what she was doing.

I couldn't stand it any longer. Damn Sora. Damn him to Hell. And Riku too. All men, actually.

Selphie erased the part about Riku and all men. It would be too vivid for poor Kairi's sensitive mind.

(Have you ever loved someone so much that it hurt?)

"I'm not sure."

Yes. She had.

Damn him to Hell. I think that my whole body would burn away if you left my side longer than a few moments.

She erased 'longer than a few moments'. Girls wanted to feel special, like you couldn't live without them if they weren't always with you.

(When Axel had me locked away, I thought I would die if I didn't see him.)

"I... Think I know what you mean."

Don't look at her Selphie! You'll get too caught up in the glow that surrounds her to finish!

I think my whole body would burn away if you left my side. Your hair is soft and fiery like pheonix feathers.

Hadn't she heard that somewhere before? Oh yes. Her mind whispered it to her everytime she would stay the night at Kairi's house.

(And when he touches me, Selphie! It's like... Like my body's on fire!)

Selphie giggled. "I'm glad you're not actually on fire."

What a stupid, stupid thing to say! 'I'm glad you're not actually on fire'. Who would be? Think Selphie, think!

Your skin is like honey suckles blossoms; flawless, creamy, nice to smell.

No, that wouldn't do. It sounded stupid. Slephie quickly erased the last part.

(Oh I wish Sora would tell me how he feels already!)

"I bet it's hard to tell the person you love how you feel."

Selphie had never known how hard until today. She had taken for granted all the love letters and sonnets and poems she had recieved from cute boys and some girls that she had carelessly tossed aside.

blossoms; flawless, creamy, and sweet.

Selphie grinned. This wasn't too hard! It just took a little time.

(Thanks for letting me stay the night, Selph! I needed this talk.)

"Anytime, Kairi."

Selphie felt like her heart would explode if Kairi said her whole name as casually as Selphie said hers! This was what countless sleepovers, secret glances, phone conversations, and closetted masturbation was boiling down to.

Your eyes have always looked at me with a passion in them that I can't explain but want to know.

Selphie thought back to English class. She wandered if her letter had what Mrs. Hart called 'dynamic flow'.

(When he found my heart inside his... He had been carrying my heart with him! It was a part of him!)

"That's cool."

Selphie was thinking of how beaten up Sora had been when he came home to Destiny Islands. The blood he had shed for Kairi was more than she could ever offer.

I would give my heart away to anyone or anything to have you look at me with those eyes.

Good. Good. It was beginning to sound better than any of Tidus's letters.

(I'm going to him right now!)

"What?"

Selphie looked up at Kairi, completely shocked.

(I've got to go to him! I've got to tell him how I feel!)

Selphie watched with horror as Kairi got off her couch, dressed quickly, then rushed out the door.

I would kill him if it would make you clearly see me, for the first time, with those eyes.

Selphie felt like her heart was bleeding.

But the only one who you find worthy of your eyes is Him. And He's gay.

Selphie thought about it for a second after wiping several hot tears from her eyes. She didn't want them to stain the page, and she didn't want to sound like she hated Sora, even though she did.

And I

She hesitated to write it out.

And I've fooled myself, thinking that I knew what women wanted. I kissed and played with boys all my life to find what made shivers roll up and down my spine.

Selphie was beginning to feel that dull sensation of writer's block.

I did it to find out what you wanted, so that I could give it to you.

Selphie was squeezing her pencil so hard it was bending in her grasp; her beautiful cursive writing was becoming less legible as the anger built up and the frustration started blinding her from not knowing what to put next.

She would have to end it here.

I love you.

There. It was done.

Now what?

Sincerely,

Could she even write her own name? What was her name? What did it start with?

Was it a 'K'? No.... She knew what started with 'K'.

Sel--

Kairi burst back through the door and into Selphie's room. She couldn't help noticing how Kairi's hair stood out against her yellow walls and monkey decorations.

(Selphie, thanks for listening.)

And then she was gone.

Selphie sat in silence for a few moments, thinking about Kairi and what it would be like to have her rushing off to proclaim her love to her.

But Selphie knew she didn't have the guts to do it.

She tore the first page from her yellow Algebra notebook, and crumpled it up.

Then she dropped it into the waste basket on her way to the bathroom.

There was a sad smile on her face.