Never Too Late

The next day, I wasn`t feeling well. Technically, because I felt like there was something wrong. Something wrong that`s going to happen. And as usual, I tried to conceal it whenever I`m with Edward. Oh, Edward. Edward, Edward, Edward. My everything. I smiled once when I thought of that, but then quickly frowned when another thought came to mind. The thought of slowly - or maybe even quickly - losing Edward. My Edward. How would I be able to handle that, if that really does happen? Would I move on quickly, and carry on? Or will I get too depressed and head on to Italy, to get myself killed by the Volturi? Pft, what now? I`m doing crazy talk! Ugh, this is so ridiculous! I stopped thinking when the bell rang - symbolizing the end of our day.

* * *

"Hey Aly, are you alright?" Edward asked, as he drove back to the house.
"Uh, yeah. Why?" I lied.
"Well, for one, you finally let your wall down the whole day. And two, you`ve been doing a lot of thinking today, but less speaking. And I heard you think of some things like 'competition' and 'back to normal' stuff. . . And you also repeated my name a lot of times in your mind. . . I couldn`t understand it. I mean, what about them? You`ve been thinking of different kinds of stuff all day and I just can`t seem to collect it all and patch it up for me to understand what your thoughts really are. . . Or where your thoughts are really centered." He explained, intertwining his hands with mine.
"What? You`ve been reading my mind? How. . .?" I trailed off while quickly blocking him again.
"Yes. A while ago. I did. Though not anymore, because I think you put your wall back up since I can`t hear your thoughts anymore." He said quietly.
"Is that all you heard? Did you hear anything else?" I asked as we arrived at their house and got out of the car.
"Um, no. I`ll tell you what I heard later." He said as he laced his hands with mine and dragged me inside the house.

* * *

"Alyssa, love, why did you think of going to the Volturi?" He asked with furrowed eyebrows as we sat on the couch in his room.
"Nothing. I just thought of maybe giving them a visit. . ." I didn`t finish my sentence.
"Visit?" He questioned.
"Oh, you know, after a couple of years. . . Or months, I guess. You can come if you want." I said.

'If you want', I`d said to him. Yeah, right. If he was still mine, that is. Though I probably won`t go if he was still mine because I wouldn`t have any reason to anyway.
Even though Alice never told me if this 'Bella' was already in the neighborhood, I have a gut feeling that she already is. Of course, why would I feel like my end is finally coming-when I can live forever-if she`s not here? Ugh! I would at least try. I promised Rosalie, Emmett and Alice.

"We won`t go there, Alyssa. What are you thinking? What`s wrong with you? Why do you think about death?!" He asked, his eyes and jaw were tight, hands balled into fists and voice rising a bit.
"You do know that we only come to them. . . If we need something from them. . . Or when we want to. . ." He didn`t finish his sentence, but I knew what he was trying to say. We only come to the Volturi when we need anything or you want to end your stay on this world.
"Do you need anything from them?" He said through gritted teeth.
"No. Though I might go someday with a different purpose. Either with or without you!" I said coldly, looking away from him and standing up.
I went to the window and crouched, then leaped through it and went outside. I had to get my mind off of things. I need to be more careful with my thoughts to avoid having arguments like this with Edward. I went straight to the meadow without thinking. I didn`t care if he found me there-if he followed after me. I just needed time to think, to be with myself for now.

* * *

My thoughts were interrupted by a familiar voice calling my name.

"Alyssa!" He screamed and quickly ran to my side, only stopping a few feet away from me.
"Get away from me, Edward. Not now." I stood up turning my back on him and getting ready to run, but he caught me and wounded his arms around my waist.
"Alyssa, please, don`t go." He pleaded.
"I didn`t mean to raise my voice awhile back. I`m really sorry. I should`ve talked to you properly about it. I`m really sorry, Aly. I just don`t want to lose you." He said and turned me to face him, though I looked at the ground.
"I`m sorry, Edward." I said, wrapping my arms around him as well, and pulling myself closer to him, then burying my head on his chest and crying quietly.
"I didn`t mean to make you mad." I said between sobs.
"Shh. Aly, love, I`m not mad. Shh. Please don`t cry. I`m so sorry." He said once more and wiped my tears away when I finally looked up at him.
"Let`s get back." He said as I nodded in agreement.

* * *

"Edward?" I called his name out.
"Yes, love?" He replied as we cuddled on his bed. Yes, he finally got a bed. 'So that we could sleep properly' he`d said. I propped myself up with my elbow to look at him properly.
"Edward, when my time comes--" I started but got cut off by Edward, his arms tightened around me.
"Stop saying that! Alyssa, you are my life now. Every time you`re far away from me, it`s like you`ve taken half of myself with you. And if you die, I swear I wouldn`t waste another second looking for another, because I would quickly follow you. You understand that?" He asked and I nodded.
"Let`s just not talk about that, okay?" He pleaded again.
"Okay. I`m sorry." I said.
"I love you." He pulled me closer to him loosening his grip a bit.
"I love you too." I replied back to him and breathed his scent in.