I'm Wearing Thin

Lindsay

It’s been a week since Alex got home, and a week since I’d seen him. He called at least seven times everyday, leaving voicemails each time, but I never answered, nor called back. I knew I’d have to talk to him soon, and he would apologize until I gave in and forgave him, like I always did. Plus, I was gonna have to let him back home soon, we shared this apartment.

As much as I hated being treated like this, I loved him too much. It’s pathetic how I depend on him.

There was a knock at my door and I had a feeling I knew exactly who it was. When I looked through the peephole, I was right; it was Alex.

“Baby, can’t we just talk?” He sighed. I debated on whether I should open up the door or not. “Please?” He said softly. I could barely hear him through the wooden door.

I slowly unlocked the door and twisted the handle, revealing a disheveled looking Alex Gaskarth. His hair was sticking up in a few places, and his eyes looked tired.

I stepped aside so that he could walk in, and I shut the door behind him. I turned to him and crossed my arms over my chest, narrowing my eyes at him.

“I’m sorry,” He mumbled.

“That’s all?”

“I don’t know what else to say!” He raised his voice. “I wish I could go back and not get drunk but I can’t change what I did.”

“Why do you do it?”

He hesitated, thinking hard about his answer for a minute or two. “I don’t know. I guess I just miss having someone to hold.” He responded quietly, not looking me in the eye. I didn’t believe that for a second.

“Well it’s not my fault you don’t let me on tour,” I clenched my jaw. “You know what, I bet the whole reason you don’t want me on tour is because if I were there, you wouldn’t be able to cheat on me,”

“That’s not it!” He denied quickly.

“Well than what is it? If you ‘miss having somebody to hold’ so much, why aren’t I allowed to come with you?” I snarled.

“Okay, your coming with me in two weeks for the next tour, alright? Will that make you happy?” He yelled. His face softened when he realized he was upsetting me. “I’m sorry, Linds, I-”

“If you don’t love me anymore, just say so,” I said, not even thinking before I let the words slip out of my mouth.

“You know I love you,” He murmured, stepping closer to me.

“No, I don’t know that, actually,” I shook my head. “You say that every single time, but I really don’t know that.”

He kissed me unexpectedly, and I pushed him away lightly. He frowned.

I walked off into the kitchen, away from the argument. I knew I couldn’t run from it, but I would still try. I knew I would cave in soon, because I was getting tired of this ongoing fight we were having. But I didn’t want to give in.

I poured myself a glass of water when I felt hands wrap around my waist. I felt his lips on my neck, cheek, and then on top of my lips. I sighed, leaning back into his chest.

“Please come on tour with me,” He begged.

“Alright,” I agreed after a minute.

“Yes?” He confirmed.

I nodded, turning towards him. He was smiling. “Yeah, I’ll go,”

He kissed me deeply, pressing me against the counter. “Can I come home now?” He asked, pulling away for minute. I nodded. “I love you, Lindsay. Get packing,” He grinned, pressing his lips to mine again.