Rest in my Chest

plastic feelings

"I've gotta go to work now, honey," Jessa leaned in and gave me a kiss on the cheek. "I'll see you on my break." And she was gone, just like that. She left my shattered heart on the ground and didn't even bother to pick up the pieces. I knew she wouldn't be back, even after everything we had done. I knew there was someone else she was in love with.

My chest was rising and falling, melting into the bamboo floors. Being absorbed by nature. I knew she had somebody else. I absolutely knew it. I saw her with Jessa. HER: Miss Lilly Crawford. She had stolen my Jessa away from me, Jessa with my heart still in her jeans pocket. It was depressing, I could feel the rush in my bones.

Without any energy of any sort, I somehow managed to walk to the backyard, pot in hand. I smoked and smoked and smoked until the afternoon turned into sunset, and Jessa still wasn't home. I cried and cried until all of my tears had been dried up. They washed away onto the flowers that surrounded me, like they did in the meadow a while ago.

Suddenly I heard a knock on the back door. I jumped and turned around, more paranoid than normal. But it was Jessa. Jessa! My love, my one love, who didn't love me like she used to. It was Jessa, the one who I had made love to, the one who I had kept tucked inside my sleeves until the sun came out to warm her cracking bones again.

But Jessa walked toward me, a huge wad of cash in her hand. "I decided to work overtime today, I hope that's okay." She stared at me and tears welled up in her eyes. She could feel my heart was broken with worries and angst, all because of my beautiful Jessa. And she could feel in her heart that it was her fault. I didn't know the effect I had on her, as she stood up and walked inside. I smoked another joint and leaned against the wall. I wasn't surprised that Jessa hadn't come back outside. She was probably going back in the car to buy more stripper clothes for her real soul mate, the one that wasn't me.

My heart started to crack so even duct tape wouldn't keep it together. I decided to go back inside, but when I stood up my head felt like it was exploding. I sat back down and held my head in my hands.

I stayed that way for sixteen more hours. I was starting to get extremely hungry once I woke up and I knew that I would need to fulfill my hunger that arrived from the munchies. So, I walked inside to find Jessa...