Take My ***ing Hand

I sat in my seat playing with my camera. I did not want to be here, in this plane headed for Oregon. Now, if this were any other air plane, or even just a beat up old car, I wouldn't mind it so much. I have nothing against Oregon. I have nothing against traveling. It just happens to be this particular air plane, at this particular moment. 

Now you might ask, 'Why would someone be so annoyed with an airplane? That's ridiculous.' 

Well, let me tell you, it was nothing to do with the airplane, rather, who's on the airplane. 

It just so happened that the same day my dad booked a flight for us to visit Oregon during spring break, The Urie family decided to take a visit to their sick grandma in Portland, which means, I'm stuck on the same air plane as Brendon Fucking Urie. Not only are we in the same plane, but he's seated directly behind me. He's been kicking my seat non stop for the last 20 minutes. I'm about to explode. 

I really hate that guy. He's done nothing but make my life miserable since freshman year. And what did I ever do to him? Nothing! I did absolutely nothing! Just because I wouldn't let him in my pants... 

I guess I should start from the beginning.

It was the first week of freshman year and things hadn't been that bad. People ignored me, and I ignored them. It was all good. 

Or so I thought. 

I was sitting at a picnic bench outside with old time friends Vicky and Spencer when he first spoke to me. 

"Hi, I'm Brendon." He flashed me a seductive smile which I tried my hardest to ignore. 

"Hi." I mumbled taking another bite of my sandwich. Why was Brendon Urie talking to me? I have no clue. But I knew it wouldn't end well. I knew very well of him and his reputation. He was the infamous school man whore after all. Guys, girls, it didn't matter. If he wanted something, he would go after it. And often times, he would acquire it. 

"So..." He sat down next to me, uninvited. I glanced towards Spence and Vicky, and they were just speechless. 

"Can I help you?" I asked coldly. I really just wanted him to go away. 

"You know, you have really pretty eyes." He said grabbing my face and forcing me to look at him. My look turned to a glare as I pulled away. 

"Thanks" I muttered.

"So, why don't you give me your number and we can hang out sometime?" He asked seductively.

Oh he would love this. 

"No thanks." I mumbled again, really just wanting him to disappear. 

He looked like he didn't quite comprehend what I was saying. "W-What?" He asked in disbelief. 

"No. Thank you." I said slower, like I was talking to an idiot. 

You see, Brendon isn't used to rejection. Usually all it takes is a few bats of his long eyelashes, and a few smooth velvety words to escape his lips to have someone swept off their feet. 

But I knew better. 

He stood up and looked down at me like I was crazy, before mumbling something under his breath that sounded something like "You'll come around." 

Day after day he would constantly stalk and harass me, driving me insane. Finally one day I just snapped. It was in the cafeteria that I yelled louder then anyone has ever heard me. 

"I DO NOT WANT TO FUCKING GO OUT WITH YOU!!" I exclaimed. Everyone stopped what they were doing to look at the scene that was unfolding before them. Brendon looked almost hurt at first, but that looked turned quickly into anger. 

"Well the fuck you! You're nothing but an annoying little freak anyway. Go take your camera and shove it up your ass for all I care!" He exclaimed bursting out of the cafeteria with his loyal crew following swiftly behind.

And there you have it. From that day forward, he turned into my own little personal bully. He's never really 'beat me up' exactly, more as slam me into lockers, trip me, verbally abuse me, and just annoy the fuck out of me. 

You see, normally I'm not this sour or bitchy. I normally have a positive out look on life, even if I come off as the introverted emo boy. But it's this ball of sunshine sitting behind me that's pissing me off. 

The plane took flight, and for the next couple hours I sat with my headphones in my ears, praying that my dad would stop chatting away with Mr. Urie and trade me seats. 

Attention passengers: This is your captain speaking, please fasten your seat belts. We are making an unscheduled stop in California due to weather troubles. Thank you for your patience. 

Great. More time with Brendon! Yay! I really hope they start letting people off the plane. I could really use a walk. I glanced out the window seeing that the small air port was surrounded by beautiful redwood trees. Everything was green and beautiful, it would be perfect for a few pictures.

They finally began to let people leave the plane, though most people stayed on because of the stormy weather outside. They said we'd be ready for take off again in about 30 to 45 minutes and to be back on the plane before then. 

Perfectly fine with me. Just as long as I don't have to deal with Urie. 

"Hey dad, I'm going to go around and take pictures for a bit." I mumbled grabbing him from his fishing conversation. 

"Alright. But be back in twenty minutes." He ordered. 

I nodded in agreement, grabbed my camera and jetted out of the airplane, (No pun intended) ignoring the stormy weather.

I flipped up my hood and headed for the direction of the trees. I spent a good ten minutes just exploring, but not straying to far from the plane. I was about to head back when something caught my eye. 

Sun rays were shinning beautifully through the open spaces between the trees, illuminating a small little clearing. In the middle of the clearing was a decaying log of some sort. I picked up my camera and took a few steps back, snapping a picture of the scene in front of me. Just as I let go of the camera, letting it dangle around my neck, something hard and painful hit me in the side of the head. 

"Ow! ....The fuck?" I said grabbing my head where it hit and scanning the forest to see where it came from. 

Sure enough, there stood Urie, leaning against a tree, arms crossed over his chest, with a devious smirk playing on his face. 

I mumbled a few profanities under my breath and began to head back towards the plane, in a direction opposite of where he was standing. 

"Hey! Where ya goin'?" He called after me. I could hear the amusement in his voice. 

"Away from you." I mumbled, not to sure if he heard me.

As I was walking away, another rock hit the back of my head.

I whipped around ready to yell in his face. 

This boy sure knew how to piss me off. I marched back in his direction, towards his smirking face. 

"What the FUCK is your problem! Why can't you just leave me the fuck alone!! I've never done anything to you!" I nearly screamed. I could tell my face was red with anger. 

"Nothing?! How about the fact that you've been mean and bitter to me ever since freshman year! All I did was try to be nice to you!" He came back with. 

"Nice?! All you wanted was to get in my pants!" 

He laughed humorlessly. "Well I don't know what the hell I was thinking! You're just some gay little emo freak who doesn't even have any friends!"

"I have friends." I mumbled. 

"Oh, you mean those losers who are always following you around?" 

"Don't talk about them like that!" I defended them. "And I may not have hundreds of fake friends, but at least I have morals! At least I don't go around fucking every guy and girl I see!"

"You're just jealous you couldn't get a good fuck if your paid the person!" 

"Like I said, morals!" I was so close to hitting him, it's not even funny. I had to get out of there before I ended up getting in a fight. 

"Fuck you and your friends! Go sit in the corner and cut yourself like the little emo freak you are. I hope you bleed to death!" 

Okay, screw not getting in a fight. He fucking deserved what was coming next. I clenched my fist and with all the force I had, punched him square in the jaw. He grabbed his face where I punched his and looked at me in shock. 

His gaze quickly melted into anger as he lunged for me, sending both of us to the ground. We ended up rolling around throwing punches and scratches just fucking pissed at each other.

At one point he rolled over so he was on top of me. It sucks that he's so much heavier then me, because he held me down and pulled back his fist in a standard punching position. 

I cringed, not exactly wanting to get punched in the face, but it was unnecessary when we both heard the most terrifying sound either one of us could imagine. 

The sound of a plane starting up and taking off with out us. We both jumped up and ran as far as humanly possible back towards the little landing strip thingy. 

As soon as it was in site, the plane began to take off. I stopped dead in my tracks, mouth agape, watching my only way out of here take off into the air. 

"Fuck!" I heard Urie exclaim in probably fear and frustration. 

How the hell am I going to get out of this one?