Empty Fishbowl.
requiem.
It's so hard to hate you. So difficult to hate you. Believe me, I've tried. I have every reason in the world to hate you. You're a fuck and you've fucked me over more times than I can count. You've cheated and lied and left and run away and blamed me for your mistakes and you killed my goldfish.
Not on purpose, but you still did.
So I have every reason and every right to hate you. And you have every character flaw that would just give me more reason. You're selfish and cruel and you think about yourself first, always. You don't know when to stop and you're a natural born liar.
I wish I could. I really wish it were as easy as that. I wish I could just give you the finger and punch you in the mouth and walk away.
But I can't. Because I don't cry about the lies and the cheating and the goldfish. I cry because you're gone. Because I'm not going to get to kiss you anymore. I'm not going to wake up first and try to quietly sneak out to the living room so I don't wake you up. I'm not going to get to steal your coffee.
And you're never going to go the store and pick up milk for my cereal again. You're never going to pull my down by the hair so hard it hurts and kiss me so hard that I forget how much it hurt. I'm not going to fuck you again or celebrate another month together. I'm not going to get to hear your lyrics first and you're not going to throw Starbursts at me when you want me to go away.
I can't hate you. Because I miss you too fucking much. And I would take all the lies and all the cheating and all the dead goldfish in the world if it meant I could still have you. Because underneath all the lies and all of your bullshit, we really loved each other. And I would die for you.
But you don't feel that way anymore. And that hurts more than any lie ever could. The truth. That it's over and that you're gone, you're never coming back. And here I am, alone, wishing you were here so I could blame you for my new goldfish dying.
Not on purpose, but you still did.
So I have every reason and every right to hate you. And you have every character flaw that would just give me more reason. You're selfish and cruel and you think about yourself first, always. You don't know when to stop and you're a natural born liar.
I wish I could. I really wish it were as easy as that. I wish I could just give you the finger and punch you in the mouth and walk away.
But I can't. Because I don't cry about the lies and the cheating and the goldfish. I cry because you're gone. Because I'm not going to get to kiss you anymore. I'm not going to wake up first and try to quietly sneak out to the living room so I don't wake you up. I'm not going to get to steal your coffee.
And you're never going to go the store and pick up milk for my cereal again. You're never going to pull my down by the hair so hard it hurts and kiss me so hard that I forget how much it hurt. I'm not going to fuck you again or celebrate another month together. I'm not going to get to hear your lyrics first and you're not going to throw Starbursts at me when you want me to go away.
I can't hate you. Because I miss you too fucking much. And I would take all the lies and all the cheating and all the dead goldfish in the world if it meant I could still have you. Because underneath all the lies and all of your bullshit, we really loved each other. And I would die for you.
But you don't feel that way anymore. And that hurts more than any lie ever could. The truth. That it's over and that you're gone, you're never coming back. And here I am, alone, wishing you were here so I could blame you for my new goldfish dying.