Love Drug

“Wow Benji, I didn’t know you could be nice.” Jadeyn teases, flicking my nose.

I wrinkle it with distaste and glare at the boy beside me. We’re both lying in the glass, watching Joey and Mary swing. Occasionally I’d get up to give him a good push, but he was doing fine by himself. He kept trying to get my attention so I can see how high he can get.

“Shut up.” I snort, looking back at Joey when he calls for me. He kicks his legs wildly in the air and laughs.

“Looky how high I am!”

“Yeah, you’re doing good.” I smile. His eyes fill with excitement and he turns back to continue pumping his small legs.

I’m surprised when Jadeyn doesn’t go to tease me again. I’m guessing it’s because he knows it only pisses me off. At least the kid knows to shut up every now and then.

“Um…Benji, I was just wondering if you’d like to come up for dinner. I uh-well I’m making it so…but I mean if-if you don’t want to-”

“I don’t want to.” I cut him off with a scowl. “Why would I want to eat your food?”

Ok, so I meant for it to sound cruel, but when I looked at him for a reaction I immediately regretted it. His eyes had watered up like he was about to cry and his smile had disappeared, now replaced with a frown. I watch as he looks down at the grass and mumbles so quietly I could hardly hear it. “O-Oh…ok…”

Jadeyn stands suddenly and I jump into a sitting position. Before I can really say anything he’s already walking over to Joey saying, “I have to go Joey. I’ll come play with you some other time ok?”

Joey pouts and I quickly push myself to stand.

“Ok,” Joey whines, reaching out to give Jadeyn a hug. “Come play with me soon Jadey!”

Jadeyn nods and his smile is so fake, but Joey is too young to see. I found myself biting my lip. Although I’m an asshole to everyone, I don’t feel like an asshole. But right now, I feel like such an insane jerk that it’s disgusting.

It’s just that look he had. He seemed so heart broken just because I turned him down like that. I didn’t expect it…really, I mean it’s just a dinner.

Jadeyn is already at the road by the time I come out of my thoughts. I take one look at Joey before running after the boy. Once I reach him, I grab his wrist tightly and whip him around to face me.

“Hey listen uh…if you’re still offering I’ll-damn it, I’ll come eat dinner,” I spit out. I didn’t say that because I cared or anything…I just said it because he looked so sad.

Jadeyn’s face is expressionless for a moment. Then he goes from surprise and shock to happiness. That all too familiar smile of his reappears on his face and the guilt that was once eating away at my stomach is gone. “Great! Come down around 5, ok?”

“Uh…do you want me to-”

“No, just you, but if you want to you can invite them.”

I really didn’t want them to comebecause I want us to be alone. I don’t want William around to ruin everything. “Nah, I don’t want them around.”

“Ok…s-see you soon?” He asks, probably to make sure I haven’t changed my mind. I shove my hands in my pockets and shrug, trying to make it seem like it’s no big deal. Jadeyn says goodbye and I watch him disappear down the dirty road.

I sigh and turn back around to find Joey and Mary messing in the creek. I grin and go up to see Joey has found a frog and is now chasing Mary around. I can’t help but laugh. It’s always great to watch these two mess with each other. Oh, the brotherly sisterly love.

~

“Where are you going?” William interrogates me after I enter the kitchen.I swear I’m not dressed up.

I finish buttoning up the black shirt, leaving the first three undone to show my white wife beater underneath. William looks at my dark blue skinny jeans and vans.I sweat I didn’t dress up! He raises an eyebrow curiously after I reply, “Jadeyn invited me up for dinner so I’m going.”

“That’s great!” The slut appears with a smile. “I’m so happy you’re making friends.”

“If that’s what you want to call him,” I grumble, arms crossed over my chest. Jadeyn and I aren’t friends. I just felt like shit earlier so I’m going…

“But I wanna eat with Benji,” Joey whines, tugging on my shirt. I smile and get down to my knees so I can see him. Ruffling his hair, I kiss his forehead.

“I promise I’ll eat with you tomorrow night.” Joey pouts, but lets me go. I smile and exit the house to go down the road to Jadeyn’s farm. It’s a lot like our own, maybe a little larger.

Sighing, I knock on the door and wait patiently for an answer. Seconds later the door opens to a show an elderly lady. I’m guessing somewhere in her fifties.

“You must be Benji!” She says, stepping aside for me to come in.

“Yeah,” I mumble, unsure whether I should be ok or worried about her knowing my name. But I guess Jadeyn had to tell her I was coming down.

“I’m Rose!” She shakes my hand. “I’m Jadeyn’s grandmother, it’s nice to meet you.”

“You too.” I say more to myself than her. Rose leads me through the house to the dining room where an elderly man is sitting. I’m guessing this is Jadeyn’s grandfather. His hands are worn out and eyes baggy from years of working on this farm, but he still has enough life in him to smile at me.

“Hello there.” He says, getting to his feet and making his way over to me. I shake his hand also. I can’t help but feel very strange about this whole situation. Meeting Jadeyn’s grandparents. Coming here for dinner. Jadeyn making dinner. It feels like a…date?Why do I like the idea of this being a date?

“I’m Chuck. Jadeyn is almost done with dinner so please take a seat.” He gestures to the table where I grab an empty seat and sit down. I bite my lip because really, I’m no good with people. What if I say something to fuck this up?

Wait…there is no this. I don’t care if they like me or not. It’s not like I need their permission or anything to hang out with Jadeyn. I don’t even hang out with him. We aren’t even friends. This does not matter!

But I still act polite. What the fuck is wrong with me?