I Must Be Dreaming

I walked off the stage in a happy daze. Jimmy was whooping beside me and the rest of the guys where telling me how good I did. "Thanks guys!" I said, still full of energy. Running down the hall, I did a cartwheel-back hand spring.
"Damn your still hyper?" Matt asked chuckling at me.
I grinned up at him, "Yessir I could do that everyday!"
"About that..Listen we seriously, like seriously need a new drummer. Pauly is going to be out for a while and besides," He leaned down to whisper in my ear, "Your better."
I laughed and replied, "Like what go on tour with you guys?"
Matt looked at me nervously, "Yeah but it's fine if you have a boyfriend or something..."
I shot him a look and replied, "One I'm single. Two even if I wasn't this is something I want to do and sure as shit no guy is going to hold me back!" I stuck my chin up defiantly.
"So was that a yes then?" He asked. I grinned and nodded. "Guys guess what!" Matt yelled at the rest of them, who had walked ahead of us, "We got ourself a new drummer! And she's cute too!" He looked down at me and winked. Jimmy made kissy noises.
"Back of Shads! Nicky Bean is mine!" Zacky called back.
I scoffed and shouted at him, "Only in your little wet dreams. Sorry boys I'm no ones." I replied as me and Matt caught up to them.
"Except for mine. Yep your ALLLL mine!" Jimmy said next to me. I tried not to crack a grin, I didn't want these boys thinking I was crazy just yet.
"Okay Beanski whatever you say." Johnny leaned down to whisper in my ear, "Good job, they'll lay off so I can have you!" I snorted and skipped ahead of all of them. men and their hormones.
I felt around my front and back pockets, "Shit!" I muttered under my breath.
"Whats up?" Brian asked me, his brows nitting together in concern.
"My fucking stupid ass didn't bring an extra twenty to get back to my hotel." I grumbled, pissed at myself.
"Not a problem, where heading back to ours right now, we have a limo. It's the least we can do for you being here tonight, and well I guess alot of nights to follow too." He replied with a small smile on his lips. I nodded and thanked him. "Not a problem, Where are you staying?"
"The Hilton about 40 blocks over." I replied.
"No shit? Thats where were staying too!" He said with a chuckle. I laughed at the coincidence and followed him and the rest of the guys out to the awaiting limo.
"We need to put this painting up somewhere on our tour bus." Johnny said, admiring the painting of Jimmy once more.
"They should put it on the back wall, above the door in the bunkroom." Jimmy said looking at it.
"You guys should put it on the back wall up above the door in the bunkroom." I said.
"Yeah thats a great- hey how'd you know it would be a great spot?" Matt said curiously.
"Because one time I snuck on your tour bus and took a pair of your boxors. Used of course, and framed them. They hang gloriously above my bed now." I kept a straight face, when I was dieing on the inside from the laughter that was trying to bubble up. Thank God I was good at distracting people.
They looked at me shock written on their face, until Matt saw my lips twitching into a smile. "Hey! That's not funny! I thought you where fucking psycho for a second there!"
I busted up laughing, and Jimmy laughed his ass of, rolling arond the limo floor. I watched a smile still on my lips as he stuck his butt in Johnny's face and looked at me with a pout, "Teddybear, Johnny's face is in my butt!" I busted up laughing again, the guys gave me funny looks.
"S-sorry I was just thinking about the look on Matt's face when I said I framed his undies." I managed between fits of laughter. All of them cracked grins at that, even Matt. We finially pulled up infront of the hotel, and climbed out. Zacky got out first and offered me his hand which I gladly took.
Matt scoffed and threw me over his shoulder, obviously trying to outdo Zacky. He carried me to the elevator and pressed the up button. "Um Matt? When can I get down?"
He laughed, which shook me too and sent butterflies to cause havoc in my stomach. "Not until your safely in your room young lady."
I scoffed and said "Shut up! Im only five years younger than you!"
"You counted?" I could hear the smirk in his voice.
"Butthead." I muttered as he walked into the open elevator doors, followed by Zacky and Johnny. Jimmy I'm assuming was already up in my room.
He swung me down so I was now being carried bridal style and he said, "Did you really just call me a butthead?" I nodded and stuck my tongue out. "Oh my God, you are a mini Jimmy." He replied.
"Nah uh cause I gots boobs and....other suff." I said innocently.
"Nice boobs too if you ask me." Zacky said with a smirk. I snickered and flipped him off. "What the hell? I am outraged Nicky Bean!" He said with mock fury.
I laughed and snuggled into Matt, his arms automatically tightening on me. I yawned, the adrenaline suddenly draining from my body as I closed my eyes.
Seconds later Matt shook me a bit, "Sweety what room number are you?" He said softly.
"701." I mumbled before going back to sleep. I faintly heard someone through the fog of sleepiness say "Dude shes on the same floor as us."
I felt someone slip my keycard out of my pocket and heard the 'click' of the door. I felt Matt lay me down on the bed and I tightened my grip on his neck, "Sleep in here please?" I asked sleepily.
"Okay, let me just go get some shorts on, I'll be back in a sec, I promise." He replied. I sighed and let go of his neck. I got up and pulled my hair out of its ponytail and pulled my jeans down. I got my t-shirt over my head just as Matt walked in. "Shit sorry I'll just-"
"Don't trip just give me a sec." I said cutting him off and rooting through my bag until I found my pajamas. After slipping them on I crawled into bed with him and layed my head on his cotton covered chest.
"What so he doesn't get cursed at when he sees you in your underwear?" Jimmy grumbled before dissapearing with a pout on his face. I rolled my eyes to tired to care about my deceased friend at the moment. Matt started twirling a long strand of my hair around his finger, making me even more tired if that where possible. I drifted off to sleep within minutes.

~xOx~

"Come here bitch!" My father yelled at me. I ran from him but it didn't help. He caught up with me and pulled me back by my hair. I yelped in pain, as he threw me to the side in disgust. He started kicking me in the ribs and calling me a worthless whore. He landed a blow right on my head, nicking me in the brow. Blood gushed. He cursed, calling me a disgrace for getting his new shoes dirty with my filth. I sobbed and he crushed my wrist, stepping on it. "FIne then! Don't fucking talk!" He spat in my face. He started repeatedly slapping me until he got bored. He pulled out a switch-blade and clicked it open. Moonlight glinting off its sharp edge. He brought it down to my throat and caressed it with it. He pulled it slowly across, drawing a line of blood. He pulled back his hand and came down fast slicing my neck half way open. Blood gushed and spewed, Strings of my muscle hung sloppily out my neck.
I woke up screaming. Matt shot up and instantly wrapped his muscular arms around my shaking body. He rocked me back and forth for a few minutes until I finially calmed down. "Bad dream?" he asked softly. I nodded and sniffed. "Want to talk about it?" he asked, I nodded my head again.
He lay down pulling me with him. I told him the whole dream, in vivid detail. He winced slightly at some of it. "Jesus you have a twisted imagination." He said rubbing my back soothingly.
"It wasn't my imagination. My dad really did that to me. Well obviously not the slicing my head off thing but...yeah." I said looking down from his intense stare.
"Is that how you got that?" He asked, his thumb tracing over the scar that was just above my eyebrow. I nodded and he held me tighter, his heartbeat singing me a lullaby."I'm sorry. No one deserves that." He said gently.
"Don't be it's not your fault. Whats done is done. It made me stronger though. The fucker is in jail now for rape and physical assault on a minor." I said, venom dripping from my words.
"H-he raped you too?" Matt asked incrediously.
I laughed bitterly, "You sound surprised. He got bored one day and after deciding breaking my leg wasn't enough, he raped me. Said I better not get pregnant and if I did he was going to throw me down the stairs to kill the retard baby. Not like he hadn't before. Throw me down the stairs I mean. But still. Killing a baby? That just really crossed a boundary. After he finished, taking my virginity by the way, I went to the police told them and havn't seen him since."
"I-I don't know what to say. What did your mom do?" He asked.
"She was dead. Died when I was three." I replied.
"You've had a fucked life." he said after a few minutes of silence.
"Yeah but I've learned to cope with it. I'm perfectly content with knowing my father is going to rot in the firey pits of Hell." I replied yawning again.
He seemed stunned by what I said and we sat in silence, him playing with the tips of my hair. "I'm sorry your dad wasn't there for you." he said after a while.
"Yeah well after age five I pretty much just saw him as my source for a roof over my head clothes on my back and- if I was lucky- food in my stomach." We sat in a comfortable silence before I asked him, "Hey Matt? Do you beleive in ghosts?"
"Yeah I do actually. Kinda freaks me out a bit though. Why do you ask?" he replied looking at me.
I couldn't beleive I was about to tell him this but by his aura I could tell I could trust him. "Promise not to think I'm crazy?" I said.
"I promise." He replied.
"Well, I-I can see ghosts. I've been able to ever since I was a little girl. A-and the reason I came to see you guys in the first place was because, Jimmy wanted to talk to you guys one last time." I said in a rush.
He sat there for a moment, taking it all in and said, "Are you fucking serious?"
I looked at him wide eyed and nodded. "This isn't you bull shitting me?" I shook my head. As if on cue Jimmy popped up and knew I told him too.
"Tell him that Jimmy says the Stallion Duck was really a goose and that he realizes it now and he's sorry that he can't pay you the hundred for the bet." Jimmy said.
I took a deep breath and said, "Jimmy says your right and the Stallion Duck was really a goose and he's sorry he cant give you the hundred."
Matt looked at me wide eyed, "Holy fucking Hell. Your not bull shitting me.."
I shook my head and said, "Hes here right now. Smirking at you. He can hear you by the way."
Matt looked around and said timidly, "J-Jimmy? It's not the same with out you man."
Jimmy relayed his message to me and I said, "He said He knows and that you guys are all bored as fuck without him but not to worry because you guys have me."
Jimmy made thrusting motions and I laughed. Matt looked at me smiling, "What?" He asked.
"Well Rev is over there," I said pointing to the edge of the bed, "Trying to make his own ghostly porn. I think he's trying to turn me on. Not working by the way Jimbo!" I said. Jimmy instantly pouted.
Matt laughed along with me. Jimmy tapped Matt on the nose and Matt's eyes popped open in surprise. "Oh yeah Jimmy you never did tell me how you where able to start touching things again?" I said.
"Well I think it's from staying Earth bound for so long, I just got stronger and now I can do little things." He looked at me mischeiviously before saying, "Im going to leave you two alone now to do...whatever." His laughter echoed through the suite and looking at Matt's wide eyes, he heard it too.
"You okay?" I asked.
"Yeah that was just like, fucking surreal." Matt said looking around. "Is he gone?"
"Yes but not for good he's still lurking around somewhere. You know he posed for that picture last week." I said.
"He's been pestering you for a week?" Matt said chuckling.
"Yeah but the little shit's grown on me, even though he's tried to sneak into my bathroom while I'm showering.." I trailed off glaring at the wall.
Matt shook with laughter, "God it's so good to have even talked that little bit with him." He said after awhile.
"Hey Matt?"
"Hmm?"
"Thanks."
"For what?"
"Beleiving me, being here, the tour, just everything." He smiled and kissed the top of my head. I fell asleep twice that night to the rythm of his heartbeat.