Status: Complete
Dying of the Light
Asher
Things didn’t improve at school. Sure, I wasn’t exactly encouraging people to talk to me, but I wasn’t been a total ass. If I’d ever regretted going to that basketball camp, it was nothing compared to now. Because of it, people weren’t even willing to give me a chance. I should have been glad, because it made my job that much easier. I couldn’t let anyone get too close.
But I could tell that Mom was starting to feel guilty about making me go to school. I was feeling angrier than ever about life. “Sweetie, you can stop going if you want,” she offered one day. “You were doing just fine with the homeschooling. I have no problem going back to that.”
The expression on her face made me feel awful. She was almost crying. I knew she just wanted me to be happy. So why was that so hard for me? I should at least be pretending harder. I hugged her, and she hugged back fiercely.
“Don’t worry so much, Mom. School’s great,” I lied. She didn’t answer, and she didn’t bring it up again.
Government class was a constant trial for me. For one, there was Bennet, who never seemed to get bored with hating me. And then there was Molly. Every day, she seemed more beautiful, more awfully perfect. Awful because I knew I could never get too close.
I’d been at the school for three weeks when I heard the teacher make the most cruel of announcements.
“Class,” she said, “we’re going to be doing some partner work! I want you team up and present to the class research about the American fight for independence. Due tomorrow.” Not only was this a ridiculously small amount of time, but who in their right mind would want to have me as a partner? I knew I was a reject, but having it confirmed wasn’t something I looked forward to.
I was understandably shocked when Molly waltzed right over to my isolated desk, taking the empty one next to it. I glanced at Ben and saw that he was not part of this plan. Great.
“Partners?” she asked briskly. She avoided my gaze, instead painstakingly arranging her pencils in a perfect row. When I didn’t respond, she glanced up, and I noted with no small amount of surprise that she was nervous. About what? Did she really think I would say no?
I considered this for a few moments, then nodded my head. “Are you sure your boyfriend over there is okay with that? He looks a little miffed,” I commented. This was probably my lowest moment at this school yet. I was fishing, trying to find out if she was taken.
Not that her response mattered to me, of course.
She looked pained, then, after a visible effort, relaxed her pretty face into a smile. “My friend will just have to deal.” I didn’t miss the emphasis on ‘friend.’ I held back a grin.
So maybe that answer did matter to me, a little.
Immediately after, though, I was glad I’d kept a straight face. Standing right behind her was Bennet, and he looked furious. My heart sank. I knew this was too good to be true.
“Molly, could we talk? Over there?” He waved behind him, towards the other side of the classroom. She looked at me, and I realized that I was blushing. I was getting more pathetic by the hour. She frowned, and my heart sank a little further. I looked away.
“No, sorry, Ben. Asher and I really need to start working on our project. Either wait until later, or say whatever it is you want to here,” she said, and I was surprised by the amount of malice in her tone. I was clearly in the middle of a fight. That must be the reason she was sitting here next to me.
I stared at my folder and tried my best to block out their conversation. I didn’t want to hear any more. It worked, and by the time I looked up again, Bennet was gone. Molly had her eyes shut, with her face blank. She looked like a porcelain doll. My hands burned to touch, but then her eyes snapped open and I looked away, studying my folder yet again.
“I’m really sorry,” she apologized. Her tone told me she meant it. Still, I kept my eyes glued on my desk. But then she touched me, and her hand was on mine. It took all of my strength not to react to the funny tingling sensation. Now I couldn’t keep my eyes away from her. How embarrassing.
“Let’s get to work,” she whispered, drawing her hand away from mine. I noticed that she was blushing, but it was nothing compared to the heat in my cheeks. After that, it seemed like time dragged, but before I knew it, the bell had rung.
She stuffed a shred of paper in my hand as she headed towards the door, saying, “come over tonight around four?” The idea was horribly appealing. I didn’t want to say yes, because I could feel myself wanting closer and closer to her, and that was unacceptable. But I couldn’t refuse. After all, our project needed finished for tomorrow. I nodded reluctantly. This was going to be a long evening.
But I could tell that Mom was starting to feel guilty about making me go to school. I was feeling angrier than ever about life. “Sweetie, you can stop going if you want,” she offered one day. “You were doing just fine with the homeschooling. I have no problem going back to that.”
The expression on her face made me feel awful. She was almost crying. I knew she just wanted me to be happy. So why was that so hard for me? I should at least be pretending harder. I hugged her, and she hugged back fiercely.
“Don’t worry so much, Mom. School’s great,” I lied. She didn’t answer, and she didn’t bring it up again.
Government class was a constant trial for me. For one, there was Bennet, who never seemed to get bored with hating me. And then there was Molly. Every day, she seemed more beautiful, more awfully perfect. Awful because I knew I could never get too close.
I’d been at the school for three weeks when I heard the teacher make the most cruel of announcements.
“Class,” she said, “we’re going to be doing some partner work! I want you team up and present to the class research about the American fight for independence. Due tomorrow.” Not only was this a ridiculously small amount of time, but who in their right mind would want to have me as a partner? I knew I was a reject, but having it confirmed wasn’t something I looked forward to.
I was understandably shocked when Molly waltzed right over to my isolated desk, taking the empty one next to it. I glanced at Ben and saw that he was not part of this plan. Great.
“Partners?” she asked briskly. She avoided my gaze, instead painstakingly arranging her pencils in a perfect row. When I didn’t respond, she glanced up, and I noted with no small amount of surprise that she was nervous. About what? Did she really think I would say no?
I considered this for a few moments, then nodded my head. “Are you sure your boyfriend over there is okay with that? He looks a little miffed,” I commented. This was probably my lowest moment at this school yet. I was fishing, trying to find out if she was taken.
Not that her response mattered to me, of course.
She looked pained, then, after a visible effort, relaxed her pretty face into a smile. “My friend will just have to deal.” I didn’t miss the emphasis on ‘friend.’ I held back a grin.
So maybe that answer did matter to me, a little.
Immediately after, though, I was glad I’d kept a straight face. Standing right behind her was Bennet, and he looked furious. My heart sank. I knew this was too good to be true.
“Molly, could we talk? Over there?” He waved behind him, towards the other side of the classroom. She looked at me, and I realized that I was blushing. I was getting more pathetic by the hour. She frowned, and my heart sank a little further. I looked away.
“No, sorry, Ben. Asher and I really need to start working on our project. Either wait until later, or say whatever it is you want to here,” she said, and I was surprised by the amount of malice in her tone. I was clearly in the middle of a fight. That must be the reason she was sitting here next to me.
I stared at my folder and tried my best to block out their conversation. I didn’t want to hear any more. It worked, and by the time I looked up again, Bennet was gone. Molly had her eyes shut, with her face blank. She looked like a porcelain doll. My hands burned to touch, but then her eyes snapped open and I looked away, studying my folder yet again.
“I’m really sorry,” she apologized. Her tone told me she meant it. Still, I kept my eyes glued on my desk. But then she touched me, and her hand was on mine. It took all of my strength not to react to the funny tingling sensation. Now I couldn’t keep my eyes away from her. How embarrassing.
“Let’s get to work,” she whispered, drawing her hand away from mine. I noticed that she was blushing, but it was nothing compared to the heat in my cheeks. After that, it seemed like time dragged, but before I knew it, the bell had rung.
She stuffed a shred of paper in my hand as she headed towards the door, saying, “come over tonight around four?” The idea was horribly appealing. I didn’t want to say yes, because I could feel myself wanting closer and closer to her, and that was unacceptable. But I couldn’t refuse. After all, our project needed finished for tomorrow. I nodded reluctantly. This was going to be a long evening.