The World Is Still Sleeping, While I Keep on Dreaming

"I hate this," I thew another pair of jeans across the bedroom floor just as Jonathan walked into the room.

"What are you doing?" Jonthan questioned looking at everything that had been thrown across the floor.

"Trying to find some fucking jeans that fit," I mumbled finding yet another pair that were too tight.

"Have you started packing for the road trip?" He asked sitting on the bed.

"What the fuck do you think I'm going?" I growled.

"Do you need any help?" He questioned.

"You've done enough," I snapped at him rubbing my temple as I heard him stand up, "I'm sorry, it's just."

"It's fine," He shrugged walking over to me to stand against the wall and watch me.

"I just hate how nothing I love is fitting anymore. Maybe like all my work out clothes but everything else is so tight and-" I started feeling my eyes water.

"Hey ssh," Jonathan pulled me into him, "It'll be ok."

"No it won't," I mumbled into his chest.

"It will, it be much longer til our kids will be here and you can get back to working out and everything will fit."

"Yeah but then we'll have kids crying at odd hours of the night all the time."

"We'll managed," He smiled kissing the top of my head, "Promise."

"Ok," I sniffled moving away from him.

"You ok?" He looked down at me as I nodded, "Are you mad about being pregnant still?"

"No," I shook my head looking through the closet, "But I swear I'm not wearing old people pregnancy clothes."

"If you did I think I'd have to get you help," He smirked at me.

"I just can't believe that I'm starting to show a lot more," I looked down with a smile at the bump growing, "It's kinda cool."

"Kinda cool?" Jonathan smirked raising an eyebrow at me.

"Well yeah, there's two life forms growing in there and dude it's just interesting," I smiled as he took my hands and kissed me quickly.

"I'm so glad you're coming on this road trip."

"Me too."

"I'm going to let you finish packing," He smiled.

"Thanks."

Finally on the plane to the first game of the road trip, I would've been asleep since I was so tired but my lap top had me awake with working out details of a New Years Eve thing at Empire and spending time with the guys the same day. Not to mention, I was put in charge of finding uniforms for my dance team even though this was supposed to be my time off. Still, it was my job and since Jonathan was working, so was I.

"You work too much," Jonathan leant over to me pulling me from my daze.

"As opposed to what?" I smirked.

"Sleeping on the plane when you know you should be."

"Speaking of sleep," I paused to look over at him, "Are they letting me stay with you in your room or what's the situation there?"

"I'm rooming with Kaner," He sighed rubbing his eyes slightly, "I think Coach roomed you with Sharpie since he knows it won't cause a problem there."

"And me sleeping with you in your own bed will cause a problem who?" I raised an eyebrow at him.

"Because I wouldn't want to get out of bed," He gave me a look.

"Not my problem there, nown is it?" I giggled to myself.

"Plus he wants us to spend time apart so we don't start fighting on the road or something."

"Yeah like something won't set us off anyway," I rolled my eyes.

"Only because you'll annoy me," He smirked.

"Just because you're an ass," I shot back.

"Children," Kaner looked back at us, "Do I need to seperate you two?"

"No, but I should probably seperate you and Jonathan," I stuck my tongue out at him.

"Blaze, how can you work now?" Patrick looked down at my lap top.

"Because some people have things they need to do."

"I mean here you are on a plane with Jonny here and all you're doing is working when there's an unoccupied bathroom right over there," He pointed in the direction of the bathroom as I raised an eyebrow.

"What are you implying?"

"Well Coach is asleep, hell half the plane is," He shrugged.

"Do you know your best friend is trying to get us to have sex on a plane?" I turned my head towards Jonathan as he shrugged.

"It's not a bad idea."

"Oh my god," I mumbled not believing the two of them.

"Like you haven't thought of it," Jonathan looked at me.

"It's cramped, not comfortable at all and other people get pissed when they have to pee."

"You talk like you've done it before," Kaner smirked at me.

"I was with Chris for too damned long," I shook my head, "Things happened in some of the most random places you could think of and all when we were making up."

"Still," Jonathan shrugged, "It's not a bad idea."

"Only you," I shook my head just as I went back to my work on my lap top for a while before getting tired and logging off.

I fell asleep on Jonathan's lap as his fingers ran through my hair the rest of the flight. I don't even remember getting to the hotel room, I just knew I woke up in Sharpie's room which was empty since the boys went to practice but according to the alarm clock next to the bed, they'd be back soon. I stretched slightly then got off the bed to look in the mirror.

My make up and hair were a mess. I had frizzed out hair like there was no tomorrow and my eyeliner was smeared. I looked like hell yet still had that certain glow which kinda aggrivated me. I fixed my hair and eyeliner quickly, just enough so I didn't look like the living dead at dinner.

Just as I sat back down on the bed to channel surf for a while, the door to the room open and a bag thumped down as I nodded at Jonathan.

"Hey," I smiled lightly at him.

"Jonathan's pissed at you."

"Me?" I questioned not knowing what he was talking about, "What I'd do?"

"It's not really you, but," He sighed running a hand through his hair, "It's paparazzi."

"Huh?" I looked clueless at him.

"Here," Patrick handed me a magazine which I took to find it was People of all things.

"You know, people should stop reading-" I started when my eyes fell onto the picture that made my blood boil and my heart stop.

Just when I thought things were finally working out for me, there sitting in front of me was a picture of me and Tyson Ritter making out behind Empire that day they came to town. It was a while ago and it was a spur of the moment thing, one of those times when I doubted Jonathan and before I realized that I was being stupid about doubting him.

"He knows that this happened a while ago, right?"

"That's the thing," Patrick sighed sitting down next to me, "All these media outlets are reporting it to being just last week."

"You've got to be kidding me?" I threw the magazine down, "And he believes them?"

"Well no, but you know how his attitude gets."

"Yeah, first hand."

"It's not all he's pissed about."

"Oh god, there's more?" I questioned.

"Seabs let out that you're a smoker, well were a smoker and smoked once you were pregnant."

"Fuck," I sighed falling back into the bed.

"He's venting to Kaner right now."

I sat up then started to head to the door, "I'm going to talk to him."

"Are you sure?"

"Patrick I just got here and he's pissed at me," I looked back at him, "There's no way in hell I'm spending this trip arguing with him about stupid shit that's happened in the past when now of that matters anymore."

"Good luck," He smiled.

I headed to Jonathan's room where Patrick had just walked out of as I was about to knock when I felt myself being pulled into the room and the door shutting behind me. I watched as Jonathan walked around me withi a s igh, clearly stressed.

"Before you start bitching," I started but he put a hand up.

"Look, I thought about it and I'm over it," He shook his head.

"What?"

"I'm over it."

"Well, then that was quick," I mumbled then looked at him, "But you're still an iditot for not coming to me."

"You've got a bigger problem," He looked at me.

"Which is?" I was clearly clueless.

"Paparazzi are following you now," He sighed which it finally hit me, "Maybe it's because I am who I am or because you're dancing and making a new for yourself but either way, they're a part of your life now and now we've got to make sure they stay out of it for us and our children."

"I didn't," I sat next to him, "I mean."

"It's ok," Jonathan took my hand, "They're going to start digging up dirt on you but we'll get through it, promise."

"Thanks," I smiled at him lightly.