Ways to Love Your Brother

We were seven days into you fourteen day grounding, and things couldn't have been more perfect. We weren't allowed to see our friends after school, so there was no Frank to get between me and Gerard. But, even though I was grounded, Frank still found was to get me alone with him.

"Frank," I whined, as he attempted to pull me into a deserted class room, "Frank please."

"Calm down, Mikey," he said with a laugh, "I just wanna talk to you," I surrendered, letting Frank pull me into the room, and close the door.

"What do you want," I asked, sitting in a desk that I had pulled closer to the wall, and further away from Frank.

"When you're ungrounded," he said, "I was wondering if you wanted to come over."

"Is that what you wanted," I was getting angry, "You could have asked me that during lunch!"

"Yes, but I also wanted to know....," Frank stopped, and looked out the door's window.

"What?"

"Well....," Frank got up, and came over, "Well.... I wanted to know if you still.... What I mean is, after your grounded would you.... Would you...."

"Would I what?"

"Would you still like me," he looked to the floor; his cheeks red.

"Of course I'll still like you," I answered, now extremely confused, "You're my best friend."

"No! Not like that....," Frank's eyes jumped from the floor to mine.

"Frank.... We were wrong from the beginning," I said, "I love you, but.... I'm with Gerard."

"Break it off them," he said, "He'll always be there."

"But this is the happiest I've ever seen him. I'm not gonna mess that up by breaking up with him."

"What about your friends," I held my breath, "Would you want them to be happy?"

"Of course," I said, "But Frank, you're being extremely unfair!"

"How am I unfair, Mikey?"

"You're playing the friend vs. family card. Come on, Frank, we both know who wins that one."

"But, I feel that there's something wrong with that now."

"You don't know that," I exclaimed.

"Like hell I don't," Frank grabbed my shoulders, "Mikey, all you have to do is follow your heart!"

"Shut up!"

"Follow it, Mikey!"

"Shut up," I couldn't take it, I wouldn't take it. Pushing Frank away from me, I got up, and went to the other side of the room.

"Mikey-"

"Just stay there, okay? Please, just stay away," I sat in the corner of the back wall, staring at the expression on Frank's face. It pretty much killed me. I had to talk to someone, I had to.

"Mikey....," Frank said, "I'm sorry. I was pushing too hard and forcing you to go in a direction that you didn't want to go in. If.... You love Gerard... I will except that, and leave you alone. But I must warm you, don't expect me to be there when you don't love him any more."

"Frank....," I couldn't believe this. He was actually giving up. What the.... He never gave up! "Frank.... Just stop whining, and get your ass over here," Frank smiled, and came over.

Straightening my legs, Frank straddled them, closing as much space between us as he possibly could. Our faces bent, and our lips met.

It was a very heated kiss, actually more heated them any of our kisses. We both gave it our all, which made it a whole lot better.

"Dammit," Frank whispered, pulling away, "I'm gonna miss you kid," my eyes widened.

"What?"

"I'm letting you go, Mikey. You're right.... We are wrong," I gave him a kiss. It was only a simple one this time. Little, meaningless.

The sound of a door closing came, and I pulled away. I Looked out of the door's window in time, to see my brother, Gerard walk off.

*_*After School*_*
Ever since the kiss, I haven't seen Gerard all day. He wasn't at his locker the same time I was, he wasn't at lunch, and his car wasn't in the parking lot during resource. I was getting worried, so before packing my books in my locker next to my brothers, I went to the office. It turned out he went home sick near the beginning of the day. Had our kiss made him sick?

Opening my locker, a small piece of paper fell from the top tray of the inside. Bending down, I put my books on the bottom, and picked the piece of paper up.

Unfolding it, I found it was a letter.

Mikey-

If you wanted more, why didn't you come to me? I would have given you that, an more willingly. Willingly. Anything you ever wanted, I would have done so, or said so.

I understand that Frank is your best friend, but I love you. I think I've loved you more, and longer than he has. Why would you taint my feelings for you y doing that?

I HATE you Mikey. You know that? Right now, I really truly hate you. I can't believe you would cheat on me. I can't believe you would ever hurt me. I just hate you.

Right now, I feel like killing myself. If I do, you'll be forced to blame yourself.

I can't believe you. You're not my brother.

Gerard.

No 'see ya at home' or 'Your loving brother', just Gerard. I could have sworn the little wrinkle be his name was a tear drop.

Tears of my own filled my eyes. Shoving everything into my book bag, Iran out of the school, and started for home. The note said he might kill himself. I wouldn't let that happen. I couldn't.

Running up to our front door, I found it to be locked. Fumbling for my key, I jammed it into the lock, and twisted it until the bolt was unlocked. Pulling the key out, I ran into my house.

"Gerard," I called, "Gerard! Please answer me," when no one answered, worst case scenarios started playing in my head.

What if Gerard had already killed himself, and his body was lying in a pool of blood on our bathroom floor? What if he went somewhere else, and killed himself there, and his body was never found? What if I had to shut the thoughts our of my head.

Running up the stairs, I looked in my parents room, in their bathroom, and in our bathroom. No sign on him. I stopped in front of our bedroom door. Taking a deep breath, I opened the door.